“Oh, and remember, next Friday is Hawaiian shirt day. So, you know, if you want to, go ahead and wear a Hawaiian shirt and jeans.” – Idiocracy
When I was a kid, I thought, “This little piggy went to market,” meant the pig went shopping. He did not.
Thanksgiving is over, sadly. We had a great one here. We had eight for dinner, and five under the roof when nightfall hit. Of course, Stately Wilder Mansion has room for more, but this was a good number. After dinner, we played games and enjoyed being with each other until things got rough – I was put in jail and nearly stabbed while I was in there. The family takes Monopoly® pretty seriously.
Other than that, it was a peaceful night. That is why I love Thanksgiving. It’s a space where (around Modern Mayberry) only one store was open today, and that store was only open for a few hours. Not that it mattered – we had everything required for dinner. I thought we were low on cream, so I sent Pugsley to the store on Wednesday. He brought home nonfat half-and-half.
At least he tried. Nonfat half-and-half? That’s like PEZ®-free PEZ™.
Thankfully, The Mrs. already had cream, and we had plenty for the mashed potatoes.
But now it’s time for the Friday after Thanksgiving: Black Friday.
My activities in Black Friday in recent years have mainly been related to not leaving the house. I really love spending time with my family, but spending time with strangers standing in line to buy things I don’t really need?
What’s the best place to find a man who has no arms and no legs? Where you left him.
That’s not my idea of fun. I don’t like shopping, even for shrubs – plant shopping always leaves me bushed.
Don’t get me wrong – I don’t look down on people looking to get a bargain on Black Friday. I’ve been fortunate enough in the last two decades of my life that the main shortage in my life isn’t money, it’s time. For those that are experiencing an acute lack of money, well, I can sympathize. To be a few dollars short is tough. Marrying my first wife was like winning the lottery: five years later I was broke.
I’ve been there.
At one time in my life, I was running at the ragged edge. Every dollar that came into my life had a home – it was already spent. That was okay, but it limited my choices. One time I was needing to pay dues to play rugby with the local club, but I was raising two children with help only from my friends. The dues were $75. I didn’t have a spare $75.
So, I had decided I couldn’t play. The next day? A check for $200 showed up (that I had no idea was even owed to me) in the mail. Huh.
I guess I could play (prop), after all.
Why are Jedi® so bad at rugby? Because there is no try.
Regardless I’ve known a life where a spare $20 made the difference in a month. This helps me to understand those that stand in line for deals at Black Friday without looking down on them. Those people are looking to do the best that they can for their family – they’re trading their time to make the lives of their family better, just as everyone who has a job and sells 40 or 60 hours of their life every week does.
The part of Black Friday that has always bothered me, though, isn’t the searching for bargains. The part of Black Friday that bothers me is the willingness of people to abandon rules of civil behavior so they can get $10 off on a toaster that they’ll use once in the next year.
Oh, sure, I love toast enough to keep mine in a cage – then I can say it is bread in captivity. But I don’t love toast enough to engage in wanton violence for cheap consumer goods. I have standards. It would have to at least be moderately priced consumer goods for me to riot for them.
The violence, though, are a signal that the cohesion that made society function so well during most of my life is breaking down. I already know that economy is broken. I think that here, in 2021, the economy is broken more than at any time in my life. That’s the good news.
I got one federal stimulus check on Saint Patrick’s Day. Must be the luck of the IRS.
Why is that good news? Even though it will undoubtedly be difficult and tough, the way forward always brings with it the promise of a new rebirth. This rebirth isn’t unprecedented – at more than one time in history have the eternal guideposts of truth, beauty, and virtue faded.
But they keep coming back. Truth may become dim under the tyranny of oppressors, but the fact that it is being oppressed doesn’t make it any less True. Again, I believe in absolute Truth. I didn’t say that I had it, but I know it exists. One plus one is two – it is never any other number. If you start at the physical, very quickly there are many examples that prove that Truth isn’t relative.
Likewise, beauty. We know what it is, because we see it. The curve and texture and color of a rose petal is elegant. It is something that is beautiful. You can, no doubt, come up with many similar examples. Beauty, though difficult to quantify, is nearly always something that people can agree on.
And virtue? For thousands of years we have known what virtue is. It shows itself in the action and grace of those that walk with it.
TOAST
I keep the toaster on the lowest setting. I am black toast intolerant.
I have spent paragraphs and posts talking about truth, beauty, and virtue. Why? Because truth, beauty and virtue matter. They are timeless and ageless. They will endure.
Humanity cannot be long isolated from them. We keep finding them, again and again, not because we are clever, but because they are eternal concepts.
Glad you had a good one John. Ours have become a bit non-traditional – this year’s was pizza and Italian desserts – but thankful none the less.
The point about the breakdown of civil order as seen on this shopping day as well taken. I think the only thing that may make this one less remarkable and then others is the fact that I have not heard nearly as much about Black Friday being a thing.
Well, this time of year, real mashed potatoes are the way to go . . . mmmm.
I think that the ‘Rona put a damper on it. I know I didn’t shop all day . . .
I remember those days of our youth scrabbling for rugby cash. We sure had fun, broke fun but fun it was.
Plus there was beer . . .
“Thanksgiving is over, sadly.”
Unfortunately, not here. My spawns’ holiday arrangements dictated that they were elsewhere yesterday, and here today, so the Domestic Goddess and I moved Thanksgiving to Friday this year. Which means I have a 15.15 lb (186 joules) turkey in the electrical smoker. Which means that I put him in there at 6 am. Which means I started preheating the smoker at 5:30. Which means that I was applying the seasoning rubs to the victim at 5 am, and wiring him for temperature telemetry via the Tooth of Blueness. Which means that I was up at 2 am to remove him from the brining bag, rinse him out, and dry him off. All of which means that I set my alarm three separate times last “night.”
On the other hand, I have relatively little to do for the next nine hours or so. I’m sitting here in my coffee place, reading the internet. It was nice of them to be open on (my) Thanksgiving! And I’m glad you had a good one.
Mmmmmm, I bet it was great!
“I have spent paragraphs and posts talking about truth, beauty, and virtue. Why? Because truth, beauty and virtue matter. They are timeless and ageless. They will endure”.
It is all around us continually you just have to seek it out. I despise black Friday. Not for the participants but for the shining example of the loss of the reason for the season. I use it to humble myself and try to refocus on that. Lord knows I need it.
May all of us here have had a happy, glorious, beauty, truth and virtue filled holiday this week. May the blessings of our Savior be poured out on us as we head towards the celebration of His birth.
Amen! And those blessings are around us, all the time.
The weird thing about Blaque Friday, other than it becoming more of a “Blaque All Of November” sale, is that I would bet the majority of purchases are stuff for the buyer, not gifts at all. Some good deals on ammo (by 2021 standards) and guns though, so it is a good time to fill in the gaps.
Yup – everything is about “the sale” – sadly.
There’s something sinister about Black Friday. That’s why I dig holes in the yard, fill them with punji sticks, and watch through the firing slits I placed in the exterior walls of my house. Considering what I’ve seen before on different news reports, it might be my only hope for survival.
Only on Black Friday? Weak.
There is something sinister, but it’s more the soul, giving in to greed . . .
I’m old enough to remember when “Black Friday” was called “Opening Day” for deer season. The mad shopping spree is not an improvement. I’m pretty sure more shoppers die than hunters now, too.
You couldn’t get me into the stores or out in the woods this weekend on a bet. I used to know a farmer who spray painted “COW” in fluorescent orange paint on both sides of his cattle the day before Thanksgiving. One or two of them would get shot every year regardless.
And don’t get me started about poachers . . . .
Yes, we used to joke about “Don’t shoot the big black deer”, back when we hunted on a farm.
Good times…
“Beauty, though difficult to quantify, is nearly always something that people can agree on. And virtue? For thousands of years we have known what virtue is. It shows itself in the action and grace of those that walk with it.”
I agree that there are standards, however they seem to shift across cultural and genetic lines. When I see Scythian art from 3,000 years ago I’m in awe, but I look at modern “art” and am appalled. Read some of the earliest European explorer’s account of Africa, and you’ll see people can have very different opinions on virtue. “The White Nile” by Alan Moorehead has some jaw-dropping accounts. Or their accounts of the Arab slave trade, some of which are included in that book.
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“I guess I could play (prop), after all.”
I too am big-boned. I played prop (I’m the other US rugby fan, glad to meet you!) for a couple years in a club. I never did figure out what the rules were, and when I asked for a rulebook I found no one had one and they said I wouldn’t understand it anyway. So I spent 2 years just chasing whoever had the ball.
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“The family takes Monopoly® pretty seriously.”
As a single guy I often get detailed to amuse the kids at family gatherings so the parents can recover from parenting. This seems to involve lots of brandy slushes. Until they saw me play most parents didn’t realize that yatzee, monopoly, trouble, hungry hungry hippos, and candyland unicorn edition could all be played with trash talking. Correction: SHOULD be played with trash talking. All games (and RL) are like poker, in that you aren’t playing your cards, you are playing your opponents. If you get inside their head you are at a huge advantage. Yeah sure sometimes they cry, but 6 year old girls gotta toughen up sometime!
I touch on modern art, and the reasons why it sucks on the Monday post.
Yeah, trash talk those kids!
None of the dedicated Black Friday shoppers I am acquainted with are in any sort of dire straits, financially. They are overwhelmingly female, and they simply adore…shopping. Touching, feeling, trying things on, leaving a mess for some poor “associate” to restore to order in their chaotic wake. Elder son’s ex had an entire bedroom reserved in their house for her endless unnecessary purchases, an astonishing portion of which was never even removed from the shopping bags, let alone unboxed and put into service.
Personally, I embraced Internet commerce the second it appeared, owing to my supreme distaste for mingling with humanity. I haven’t set foot in a mall since Garfield was president. I even order my yearly Valentine’s Day card for my bride from the ‘Zon. Just so I don’t have to rub elbows with some other clueless, awkward married guy who looks as woefully out of place at the Hallmark store as I feel at Forever 21.
It might seem that big retailers have gotten smart or at least image-conscious about the yearly madness. Target, Walmart, Kohl’s, Hobby Lobby were all closed yesterday around these parts. But I suspect that just like the members of OPEC, who did not trust one another as far as they could spit, as soon as one of the majors breaks ranks and quietly returns to declaring open season on big-screen TVs at dinnertime, Thanksgiving Day, the floodgates will reopen. There are at least 3 women in my immediate family who recall, wistfully, the good old days of throwing hip checks and capping knees for one of those three discontinued-model Keurigs that went up on deep discount “while supplies last”.
Yup – most are women. Pugsley saw a monitor he wanted, but his brother talked him out of it (I think).
With the Dow down 2.5% today, and futures down another 2.5%, maybe we’ll restore the traditional meaning of “Black Thursday” (1929, Dow opened -11%): the official start of the First Great Depression.
Will there be enough Fed cash to prop it up? We’ll see . . . !
Black Friday meme:
https://ibb.co/LJ8NLVv
Ha! So true!
In the olden times, before we became an Idiocracy, the store would give everyone entering a 10% off coupon to celebrate Black Friday. We practiced capitalism then. So you’d wander around the store until you saw the bloke in the Pez aisle, looking at the expensive line of Pez dispensers that cost $2 each. You’d offer $1 for his coupon, which was a 50% savings for him. And you’d do that all over the store.
Pretty soon, you’d have collected 7 or so 10% off coupons and could buy a $2000 TV for $600.
Now, the store offers that same 10% coupon but the first thing everyone does is goes to the sporting goods aisle and picks up a baseball bat. Whoohoo! ‘Merica 2021.
Next year, there will be no merchandise available on Black Friday. Everyone will use their Thanksgiving Day Brick that night to get all the merch for free.
I’ve been reading Strauss and Howe, “The Fourth Turning”. It seems that the path back to Truth, Beauty, and Virtue must always pass through an Unraveling and then Crisis. Winter is coming!
Sure, why shop when you can have a flash mob and get 100% off?
We always put up our Christmas Tree the day after Thanksgiving. It is very pretty. I like turning off all the room lights and seeing the silent, peaceful glow.
In our house, most of December is “Advent”, not Christmas, so we wait, and wait, and wait, and put lights and ornaments on the tree just in time for the Solstice. The “Twelve Days of Christmas” start on Dec. 25. There will be Finnish braided bread (spiced with cardamom), hot tea and cider, for Christmas morning. I never figured out how the Finns got cardamom, though, since it’s grown in the Middle East.
Yup, with Christmas music and some wine or egg nog . . . .
I got up once early for Black Friday. We were spending Thanksgiving at the Mrs. and my best friends house. Thursday evening, we pored over the newspapers at the different deals. Made lists of stores and lists of things to buy and lists of all the lists we had. I had gotten into the spirit of Black Friday in a major way. You could say I was obsessed. Set the alarm clock and got about 2 hours sleep before waking up at O’ dark thirty (what’s the O stand for? O’ my god it’s early!)
Made coffee, cooked breakfast for everyone and then realized that I was the only one awake. Ate all the breakfast, then went back to bed.
Ha! Time spent well, when compared to shopping . . . (personal opinion, there).
We had a quiet Thanksgiving. Just The Missus and I (and the dogs).
I’d had a couple whiskeys and, not thinking, fed a couple large slabs of turkey skin to the dogs. I forgot how that ferments in their bellies; I was reminded of that at 11: 38, 1:23, and 3:44 when I woke up gasping for air.
Other than nearly suffocating, I’ve been binging on Yellowstone, catching up on the most dysfunctional criminal enterprise this side of Little Italy. Some interesting storylines, but I have trouble understanding the native gal, Monica, because even though I can see she’s speaking words, all I can hear is “WAAAAAH! WAAAAAH! I’m SOOOOO SAD!” (she is very annoying).
Went to the tree farm and cut our Christmas tree today. That was about all the excitement I could manage the Day After.
Cheers to all fellow readers here at the Triple-Dub.
I’ve heard good things about Yellowstone – I want for it to end before I watch it . . . I hate waiting.
Cheers to you!
At our school rugby was a club sport with less oversight. Somehow we were sponsored by Coors. Not the best beer but it can be intoxicating. Their contribution was 2 kegs per game. We’d finish one at the half – insisting the opposing team drink their share. That led to a lot of wins – and of course we had the second keg at the end then start drinking. I fondly recall enticing young ladies who had never attended to sit on a teammates shoulders so she could be “rugby queen” and then regaled with songs. “Barnacle Bill the Sailor”, “Lupe the Long Island Wh*re” and other great classics. The post-game lacrosse parties were almost as fun (big overlap in team players and fans). Late 70’s/early 80’s for context.
Now? Kids can’t (around here) wear shirts with beer company names on them. Shoulda changed our last name to Coors . . . 🙂
Good times – rugby, beer, and your whole life out if front of you.