Burning Your Way To Happiness

“No! Look, what’s the matter with you all? It’s perfectly simple: We have the fire drill when I ring the fire bell. That wasn’t the fire bell! Right?” – Fawlty Towers

At the pub, the owner told me I was drunk and needed to take the bus home.  Turned out those are even harder to drive when you’re drunk.

It was a cold, February campout.  It was also rainy, and also weather that most folks would call miserable.  In fact, it was also the first campout that I was Scoutmaster.

I think the temperature, at its highest, was probably around 45°F.  It froze at night.  We put our tents up in the dark, and I snuggled deep into my sleeping bag.

The next morning, we had breakfast.  One thing that I had changed since I became Scoutmaster was that the Scouts bought, cooked, and ate their own food.  One thing I observed on previous campouts was when the kids and adults ate the same food, the adults wanted good food, and wouldn’t leave the kids alone.  Me?  I had no desire to eat chicken tartare, so I let the kids fix their own food, and I often cooked for the adult leaders.

I drew a picture of a criminal once.  He looked pretty sketchy.

The plan for the day was fairly simple.  80% or more of the Scouts needed to get to First Class (a rank where a boy would know most of the things so they could survive a solo campout for a few days, if need be).  We focused on First Class skills.  One other thing I instituted is that the older Scouts were to teach the younger Scouts, for reasons that are probably obvious.

My job, mainly, was to drink coffee and take someone to the hospital if the hatchet got the best of them.  At this campout, there was one Scout in particular who had very little skill at anything.  One of the Scouts of higher rank ran him through building a fire.

Jack London aside, building a fire after a rainy night on a blustery, rainy day isn’t the easiest of things.  And, to be fair, this Scout wasn’t the quickest on the uptake.  But he worked at starting his fire for a really long time.  More than an hour?  Certainly.  But he had dogged determination, and finally got his fire going.

“Okay,” I said, “You can put that one out now.  That qualifies.”

“No, I want to keep it going.”

I hear arsonists do well on Tinder®.  They have a lot of matches.

I was fine with that.  It was his fire, and if he wanted to keep it going, I was fine with that.  There was little chance of him burning down the soggy campground.

He kept the fire going through the night, feeding it, and teasing it along.

He made First Class, but I must point out, by the time he got the rank badge it wasn’t nearly as important to him as building that fire.  He had acquired a skill.  He could do more than he could before.  He did not need outside validation.  The achievement was part of him.  He was proud of himself.

So often, we get tied up in feeling about things that are beyond our span of control.  Marcus Aurelius wrote, “You have power over your mind, not outside events.  Realize this and you will find strength.”

I hear that Marcus Aurelius got the first weather report.  “Hail, Caesar!”

I know that we are living in a world filled with tough situations.  I would say this, if some outside event upsets you, go ahead and be upset.  Until midnight.

Then, take control.  Realize that what you can be and do is the important thing.  As that Scout taught me, being fulfilled isn’t being surrounded by supermodels and driving a Lambo® while they softly nuzzle your neck and . . . where was I?  No, that’s not fulfillment.  Fulfillment is achievement.

Almost every single person reading this has the power to be better tomorrow at something.  A skill.  Bench pressing five more pounds.  Learning Shakespeare in the original Klingon.  Becoming a better carpenter.  Finally trimming those nosehairs, or at least weaving them into an attractive scarf.

Me?  I write, and try to get better.  When I’ve written what I want, I don’t need anyone to tell me – I feel it inside.

And I’m okay.

Except in especially tragic situations, it is in our power to be better.  It is in our power to improve.  And through doing so, it is in our power to build internal strength.  And we don’t need anyone to validate it.

Life is tough, and it’s even tougher when we try to take on every injustice in the world.  Sometimes we just need to take a few minutes, and build a fire.

Author: John

Nobel-Prize Winning, MacArthur Genius Grant Near Recipient writing to you regularly about Fitness, Wealth, and Wisdom - How to be happy and how to be healthy. Oh, and rich.

32 thoughts on “Burning Your Way To Happiness”

  1. Fire is a construct of Prometheus. (sarc)

    “Uh huh huh, uhh…let’s burn something.”

    Beavis

    Fettermann/Abrams 2024 burns it all down the extra most bestest.
    Yes we can!

  2. At the moment I am in an early morning waiting room and my plan for improving myself today is getting a small basal cell cancer removed from my right ear. Collateral damage from my ear being gently nuzzled by sunlight over the years in a topless convertible? Maybe. I think they are gonna cut instead of cauterize, so if i wanna improve myself via fire, that’s on me.
    Thanks for the push, John.

    Out, out damned spot!

    1. In the ops room now. Turns out they DO cauterize, with the wall mounted Hyfrector 2000! Here we go…

  3. True and very true, There is less merit in naming every injustice and lamenting
    about them all day and all night Maryann. There is more merit in creating a solution,
    if only for your loved ones. TaDa

  4. ‘Life is tough, and it’s even tougher when we try to take on every injustice in the world. Sometimes we just need to take a few minutes, and build a fire.’

    Good counsel. I think I will build a fire and burn down every iniquity in Shit World. Might be some iniquity-doers included.

    Stocked on marshmallows. Don’t need weenies because New Amerika is full of them.

  6. And, yes, the recent election was a huge disappointment, but – Get Over It!
    Concentrate on the things you CAN change – like working with your local election board to clean up the rolls.
    Or learning new non-electronic skills.
    Or building your local alliances (and, equally useful, your personal list of the Never-to-be-Trusted).
    But, don’t whine about what you can’t change.

  7. All elections are local.
    Consequences are local.
    Trees and rope are local, too.
    Smokey says, “Only you!”

  8. Thanks, John for another uplifting post as we all try to grapple with what we can control. Hard part is trying not to let those things we can’t fix at our level get you down.

  9. This brings to mind a discussion from the mid-80s with a Ph.D chemist for whom we stored chemicals (MEK, Varsol®, etc.) to make furniture finish strippers. He grew up dirt poor in rural Manitoba, and at age 7 or 8 his mother gave him radish seeds to plant and care for. Excitement got the better of him, and he pulled all plants up two weeks later. He proudly showed them to her, seeing the disapointment in her eyes turn into a smile. She said that was great, but let’s see what happens after a month next time.

    He never forgot that lesson when it came to dealing with his children. As well as well-intentioned but “slow” employees.

  10. I really enjoyed this one. It resonated especially well with me. I told my wife about it, and her take on it was that your conclusion was perfect: she will continue to try to take on every injustice in the world, and I can build the fires.

  11. Compared to life prior to the midn19th century we do NOT live in a world of “tough situations”. We !I’ve in a plush, comfy, warm well fed world full of choices. Most of which we suffer few if any serious consequences for if we make a poor choice. If the criminals power have their way we will all learn very soon what a “tough situation” really is. And many will not survive that harsh lesson.

  13. Ah, yes I remember it well. To this day, I always carry a Zippo and a small, secure container of Boy Scout Water wherever I go. Bleib ubrig.

  14. A read that brings back memories. Sea Scouts, so building a fire in the keel was kind of frowned on. But we had other pleasures, like leaning how to sack a 200sqft jib soaking wet in 8ft swells or doing the math for a noon sighting mostly in your head.

    I notice our author graduated from the Henny Youngman school of comedy. Keep it up. 🙂

  15. For some reason, some of the more miserable camping experiences are the most memorable to me. Freezing rain, snow, and as I was bugler, the pleasure of always being the first one dragged out of “bed” every time by a scoutmaster. But they always had a fire going already so I could warm up before and after blowing reveille.

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