Minnesota’s Somali Scam Shindig: Empty Daycares And Sharia Dreams

“I understand, but it is my duty to remind him that my men are surrounded by thousands of armed Somali militia.” – Black Hawk Down

Somalians can’t learn to spell because they don’t know the alphabet:  they spend years at C. (most memes as found – the boating one is mine)

I have a friend that I’ll call “Jim”, primarily because his name is Jim and he often gets confused when I call him random names that aren’t “Jim”.  After I got divorced, there was one female I was put into regular social meetings with.  I thought she was cute.  Jim met her, and asked me after a brief conversation:  “John, what do you have in common with her besides your eyes and her butt?”

It was a good thing for a friend to say for me to recognize that, yeah, I’ve got nothing in common with her.

Which brings us to Minnesota.

Minnesota is the land of ten thousand lakes, casseroles, and apparently, a bottomless pit of taxpayer dollars fueling Islamic terrorists and Somali grifters.  If you thought the only thing in Minnesota that was make-believe were the Vikings’® Super Bowl© hopes, well, wait until you hear about their “child care”.

Not that the mainstream is talking about it.

Nick Shirley, the X®-using reporter (@nickshirleyy), created a recent video exposé has actual Americans madder than Ketanji Brown Jackson when you ask her what a woman is and it’s mean of your to ask because you already know she’s not a biologist.  In a 42-minute takedown that has racked up millions of views, Nick and his crew documented over $110 million in fraud in a single day.

That is not a typo.  One.  Single.  Day.

It is like finding out your grandma’s cookie jar is funding a phantom bakery run by the Taliban and Bernie Madoff.

Let’s start with the star of the show: a so-called daycare in South Minneapolis with a sign that reads “Learing Center.” Yes, “Learing.”

As in, they cannot even spell “learning,” but they managed to “lear” how to get $1.9 million in tax-exempt funding from the state’s Child Care Assistance Program in 2025 alone.

Shirley rolls up to the Learing Center, camera in hand, and what does he find?  No kids.  No toys.  No sticky fingerprints on the walls or small bootprints in the snow.

Just an empty building that looks like it last saw activity during the Carter administration.  This is not some isolated oopsie; it is one of hundreds of such “daycares” sucking down (at least) tens of millions in government cash.

Critics are demanding accountability from Governor Tim Walz, who is in classic politician “just don’t talk about this inconvenient fraud”-mode.  J.D. Vance chimed in, blasting the whole mess as a symptom of deeper rot, because he’s in his “let’s tweet® about this but not do anything”-mode.  And the FBI? They say that they are surging resources to dismantle these schemes, with Director Kash Patel calling a $250 million food aid fraud just the “tip of the iceberg” while he’s in his “how do I keep this hot chick”-mode.

No arrests.

Just a guy with a camera exposing this while the FBI was busy (poorly) redacting Epstein Files.

Now, if this were just about misspelled signs and empty rooms, we could laugh it off as bureaucratic bungling and that legendary Somali ingenuity in creating mud-huts.  But here is the punchline that is not funny:  it appears that almost all of this fraud ties back to Somali operations.  I guess when you’re a pirate at heart, everything looks like plunder.

Minnesota has the largest Somali population in the U.S., thanks to refugee resettlement programs that started in the 1990s because Somalians viciously killed Americans who were there to protect people bringing Somalians food and medical care.

Yes.  We took in people from a country so feral that they’d kill you while to tried to keep them alive.  So, these Somalis had a thought:  why not scam the people who saved them?  Thus, “Feeding Our Future” scandal:  dozens, mostly Somali, charged with stealing $250 million meant for kids’ meals during COVID.

Prosecutors say the total fraud across fourteen social services programs could hit billions.

That is enough to buy every Minnesotan a lifetime supply of lutefisk and still have change for a Vikings® Super Bowl™ ring.  Oh, wait.

I guess there’s still the lutefisk.

But the fraud doesn’t stop at fake daycares.

Medicaid is another black hole.  Allegations suggest up to $9 billion has been siphoned since 2018, with (surprise!) Somali-linked groups in the spotlight.

This is like a magic trick where your tax dollars disappear producing no good for society, and poof, luxury cars and overseas wire transfers appear so that moslem warlords can have a Mercedes™ and RPGs.  Republicans in the state legislature are pushing for reforms, but Democrats?  They are busy condemning the scrutiny as partisan because it’s partisan to not want to waste tax dollars on people who want to kill Americans.

Heaven forbid we ask questions about where the money goes.

This brings us to the extrapolation part, where the plot gets thicker than a Somali accent.  If fraud is this rampant in welfare programs, what about voting?  Minnesota’s automatic and same-day voter registration and no-ID policies are a fraudster’s dream.

Non-citizens getting ballots?  It happens.

With the Somali community under the microscope for fraud, whispers of illegal voting are growing louder.  I’m sure that they’ll be natural conservatives, right?  I mean, when a moslem shot a bunch of people in Australia, he was immediately called right wing.

To top it off, videos are circulating of Somalis in Minnesota straight-up preferring Sharia law over the Constitution.

  • “Sharia law is better than any law here.”
  • “I’d rather live under Sharia in Somalia.”
  • They defend arranged teen marriages and violence for religious insults.
  • A Somali cop boasts, “We work for our own people.”
  • Another declares, “This is our land now.”

This is not blending in; this is invasion.   A survey shows half of Somali youth identify more with Somalia than America.  I generally say that it takes three generations (at minimum) to fully Americanize someone, but that assumes that they’re Christians from Europe.

How long until Somalians assimilate?  Forever if they want to turn Minnesota into the land they left, but with concierge service scammed from your tax dollars.

The total tab? Possibly $18 billion at the latest estimate and climbing.  It was only a billion a month ago, and $10 billion two weeks ago.

It is a corruption conga line, with Walz at the front, insisting everything is fine.

We work hard, pay taxes, and expect government to guard the till.  Instead, it is a free-for-all.  Hell, for all I know we could balance the budget and have a surplus if we’d just stop funding USAID and Somali Autism Pirates who funnel the money back to Democrats and terrorists.

But I repeat myself.

If Minnesota is the canary in the coal mine for unvetted immigration and lax oversight, the bird is dead.  It’s not pining for the fjords, it’s passed on.  This bird is no more.  He has ceased to be.  He’s expired and gone to meet his maker.  If Democrats hadn’t nailed him to the perch, he’d be pushing up the daisies.  This is an ex-canary.

We don’t have anything in common with the Somalians.

At all.  They’re not happy:  I mean, they wouldn’t be happy if we shut off the revenue.

We’re not happy.

And it’s time we all recognized it, separated, and moved on.

There Ain’t No Voting Our Way Out of This, Your Sunday Song.

The latest.  I can’t find an exact etymology of this phrase – it appears to be from around 2013, but, who knows?  Regardless, this is what happens when you have phrase and make a song.

Enjoy!

Behind the Music:
We’re getting pretty close to having the songs out into the world for purchase and streaming.  Accounts are being set up, et cetera. I need to generate the final cuts, and generate the final artwork and upload.  Until then, you can listen to them all here at this link.  Note that songs with an asterisk won’t be available on streaming.

There Ain’t No Voting Our Way Out of This
By John Wilder

Sittin’ on the porch with a rifle ‘cross my knee
Hearin’ the news spin lies like tumbleweeds
They tax us blind, send jobs across the sea
While the fat cats laugh in their ivory seats

We’ve hollered loud, we’ve marked our ballot true
But the game’s rigged tight, no red or blue
Ignore our children, the farmer and the mill
Bendin’ for billionaires on Capitol Hill

There ain’t no votin’ our way out of this
Ballot box broken, sealed with a Judas kiss
Washington’s forgotten the fire of ’76
Played into big money’s hands, now we’re in a fix

The spirit’s stirrin’, powder keg is lit
There ain’t no votin’ our way out of this

From sea to shinin’ sea, our voice is drowned
By lobby dollars, backroom deals downtown
They forgot the people who rose with pitchforks high
Men who fired the shot heard ’round the world that night

We tried the peaceful path, we marched and we prayed
But the chains get tighter every single day
Time to dust off the muskets, remember Lexington
The tree of liberty needs refreshin’, son

There ain’t no votin’ our way out of this
Ballot box broken, sealed with a Judas kiss
Washington’s forgotten the fire of ’76
Played into big money’s hands, now we’re in a fix
But the spirit’s stirrin’, powder keg is lit
There ain’t no votin’ our way out of this

We’ll stand like Washington at the Delaware’s edge
Cross that river again, make our solemn pledge
No more kneelin’ to kings in suits so fine
This land is ours, by God, it’s nearly time

There ain’t no votin’ our way out of this
But we’ll rise like eagles, clench our fist
Washington’s forgotten, but we remember well
The shot heard ’round the world ringin’ clear as hell
Revolution’s callin’ if you listen to what they say
There ain’t no votin’ our way out, we’ll have a new Independence Day

1776 . . . you can see it on the horizon

Paperwork American: Saturday Song

This one is for Vivek.

Behind the Music:
We’re getting pretty close to having the songs out into the world for purchase and streaming.  Accounts are being set up, et cetera. I need to generate the final cuts, and generate the final artwork and upload.  Until then, you can listen to them all here at this link.  Note that songs with an asterisk won’t be available on streaming.

Paperwork American
By John Wilder (with apologies to The Beatles)

Paperwork American
Paperwork American

Dear Harley Davidson, will you sponsor an H 1-B
I’m from Mumbai wonderful India, you see
I know that the needful you will do
Because I worship a monkey god that is blue

Paperwork American

My application says I know I.T.
But I bribed an Indian University for a degree
I don’t know a thing about tech that will last
But I want to get a job and hire my own caste

Paperwork American
Paperwork American
Paperwork American

I’ve got a thousand relatives, give or take a few
They’ll be making more in a week or two
I can grovel to you if you like the style
And hate you behind your back all the while

Paperwork American

If you really like me get me a green card
And we’ll immigrate a million into your backyard
If you must return us, please not back to India
Because I need a break and I want to be a paperwork American

Paperwork American
Paperwork American
Paperwork American
Paperwork American
Paperwork American
Paperwork American
Paperwork American

Merry Christmas: Holy Birth Thunder

I described my plan for this song to Pugsley:

JW:  “I want to make a badass metal Christmas song.”

Pugsley:  “I think you’re missing the meaning of Christmas.”

I then made him listen to it, and said, “I like it!”

No, third graders won’t be singing this at the Christmas program anytime soon, and I imagine Silent Night is safe (for now).  But I got what I wanted out of this song – a badass metal song that is reverential about Christmas.

I was going to post it tomorrow, but, what the heck.  Enjoy!

Behind The Music:
All the songs so far are here (LINK).  Still working on the downloadable stuff.

Holy Birth Thunder
By John Wilder

In the shadows of Judea, under heaven’s watchful eye
A virgin pure conceives the Word, defying mortal lie
Prophets’ words ignite the night, the ancient scrolls unfold
The Messiah comes tonight, to shatter chains of old

Shepherds quake on hills of stone, angels blaze the sky
“Glory to the newborn King!” their cry splits the high

No silent night, but a thunder divine
Sin’s empire crumbles, the holy sign
From Bethlehem’s manger, the King is born
Redemption’s hammer, the veil is torn

Holy birth’s light shakes man’s throne
Son of God descends, flesh and bone
Crush the serpent, break the curse
Salvation’s fire, the universe

Holy birth’s promise, eternal might!
He pierces darkness, endless light!
For mankind’s soul, the King arrives
In glory’s blaze, the faithful thrive

Wise men ride from eastern storms, guided by the star
Bearing gold and myrrh and frankincense, from lands afar
Herod’s rage, a tyrant’s fear, seeks the Infant’s blood
But divine decree protects the child, in the holy flood

No room in inns for Heaven’s Heir, in a stable low
Yet from humility, empires He’ll overthrow

No tranquil scene, but a cosmic war
The Word made flesh, forevermore
Against the void, the Savior stands
Eternal victory in His hands

Holy birth’s thunder shakes man’s throne
Son of God descends, flesh and bone
Crush the serpent, break the curse
Salvation’s fire, the universe

Holy birth’s thunder, eternal might!
He pierces darkness, endless light
For mankind’s soul, the King arrives
In glory’s blaze, the faithful thrive

The cross awaits, but here it starts
The Lamb of God mends broken hearts
Not seasonal cheer, but sacred flame
In Jesus’ name, we’ll win the game

Holy birth’s light cracks the sky
Emmanuel, the battle cry
Defeat the grave, redeem the lost
He’ll pay the cost, He’ll pay the cost

Holy birth’s thunder, divine decree
From manger to throne, set us free
The holy fate, The King’s roar,
Christ is born – forevermore

Gloria . . . gloria . . . in excelsis Deo
Gloria . . . gloria . . . in excelsis Deo
Gloria . . . gloria . . . in excelsis Deo
Gloria . . . gloria . . . in excelsis Deo

 

The Post of Christmas Past

“The most enduring traditions of the season are best enjoyed in the warm embrace of kith and kin.  Thith tree the a thymbol of the thpirit of the Grithwold family Crithmath.” – National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation

The Mrs. made a Christmas decoration out of $100 bills.  She called it her Aretha Franklins.

Notes:  I’ll have a new song tomorrow and two for this weekend.  I am, however, debating on putting together a post for Friday.  We’ll see – it’s a coin toss right now and probably depends on how sleepy I am after Christmas dinner.

Ahhh, Christmas.  One of the things that has become traditional in the time since the VCR ruled supreme is, of course, the Christmas movie.  Many of them are quite bad, but a few stand out in my mind and they’re below.  This doesn’t include Christmas TV specials, of which A Charlie Brown Christmas is clearly the very best.

It’s a Wonderful Life is on the top of many lists and it’s the oldest on this list with the next-oldest showing up forty years later.  It’s got a solid cast, and a message that, perhaps, unbridled capitalism isn’t the way so it probably makes Libertarians sad.  Yet, the reason it’s so popular is, like Night of the Living Dead, the copyright holders failed to renew that copyright in 1975 so television stations could flog it like a rented horse and pay nothing.  If you have ever been around people in the broadcasting business, “free” is their heroin, so they played it over and over because, hey, free Christmas heroin.

Home Alone is a funny movie, but not horribly Christmas-y.  Change the setting to Thanksgiving or summer vacation or the execution of a convicted killer based on a wacky misunderstanding and nothing really changes.  But a lot of people really like this one, so it’s in.  And it is hilarious, especially the Stooge-esque scene of mayhem at the end.  Heartwarming?  I little.  It tries but mainly fails, because my heart is mainly immune from warming.

Die Hard?  Yes, it’s a Christmas movie.  The real villain in the movie was Joseph Takagi.  Why?  He scheduled an office party on Christmas Eve.  Who does that, the Japanese Grinch®?  The movie is really well made from start to finish, and holds up to repeated viewings.  And, after all, as my kids say, “It’s not really Christmas until Hans Gruber falls off Nakatomi tower.”

Elf.  So, let me get this straight, Santa kidnapped a baby and we give him a pass?  I’m not really that fond of Santa movies.  Why?  I don’t know.  Let’s just say I figured out that scam pretty quickly and hold a grudge.  But Will Ferrell is generally funny, and plays childlike enthusiasm very well, especially bouncing it off of Jimmy Caan.

A Christmas Story.  Top tier, and probably tied for my very top spot as a Christmas movie.  It is very uniquely a story about Christmas in America before globalism and while commercialism was still amateurish (Drink more Ovaltine®?).  It did also capture that great sense of joy, wonder, and anticipation that comes from being a kid awaiting his first shootin’ iron.  It also was wonderful at showing a family that was cohesive despite of (and maybe because of) the daily ups and downs and struggles.  When I was younger, I saw it through Ralphie’s eyes, and then through the eyes of The Old Man.  Perfect on all levels.

National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation.  Did I ever mention that the clerks at the grocery store would let me buy National Lampoon® when I was 8?  I think they would have sold me booze and smokes, too.  Regardless, this is clearly the best of the movies that National Lampoon™ ever put its brand on.  I’d also say it’s the most consistently funny movie on this list.  Randy Quaid still makes money autographing photos with “Shitter’s Full.”  Why can’t I have that career?

Scrooged.  This is a favorite of The Mrs.  Peak Bill Murray hamming it up with a message that, perhaps, it’s not all about him, but rather his family, which (as far as I can tell) nearly all in this film playing various roles.  But maybe stapling the antlers to the mice would have been an interesting scene to make the movie more engaging?  I think the late, great Michael O’Donoghue was the spark on the script, but whoever was responsible, they did a very good job bringing this story into the 1980s.  Making fun of commercialism while bringing $100,000,000 back to the bank was pretty good work.

Fatman.  It’s Mel Gibson as Santa taking a contract with the military-industrial complex to produce weapons because business is down while being pursued by a hitman.  Santa Claus becomes John McClane?  Barely a Christmas movie.

The Long Kiss Goodnight has Geena Davis at her hottest playing an amnesiac assassin in a story written by the guy who wrote Predator and directed by the guy who directed the only move I’ve been in (The Adventures of Ford Fairlane).  Christmasy?  No, not really even though it’s set at Christmas.  And, this is crucial to the plot, but it could be almost any holiday.  Why on the list?  It’s an excuse to post a picture of Geena Davis.

I very much expected this list to be longer, and, in fact, had to throw on a few that I normally wouldn’t (Fatman, for instance) to pad it out.  I’m imagining there weren’t a lot of surprises on the list.  Did I miss any of your favorites?

Die Ho Ho Ho: A Christmas Carol

A bit of something lighthearted for Christmas.  I’ll have another Christmas song for Christmas day.

Behind The Music:
All the songs so far are here (LINK).  Still working on the downloadable stuff.

Die Ho Ho Ho
by John Wilder

Deck the halls with boughs of Holly Genaro
Fa la la la la, la la la la
John McClane needs more dinero
Fa la la la la, la la la la
Terrorists crash the festive cheer
Fa la la, la la la, la la la
Hans Gruber’s plan is crystal clear
Fa la la la la, la la la la

Yippee-ki-yay, Father Christmas night!
Fa la la la la, la la la la
Nakatomi’s tower, what a fight!
Fa la la la la, la la la la
Barefoot hero squirms the vents so tight
Fa la la, la la la, la la la
Saves the day with guts and dynamite
Fa la la la la, la la la la

‘Tis the season to be crawling
Fa la la la la, la la la la
Through the elevator, the bad guys falling
Fa la la la la, la la la la
Holly’s a hostage, Argyle’s drivin’
Fa la la, la la la, la la la
Powell’s on the radio, forgivin’
Fa la la la la, la la la la

Yippee-ki-yay, Father Christmas night!
Fa la la la la, la la la la
Machine guns blaze under twinkling lights!
Fa la la la la, la la la la
John drops Hans from the Nakatomi height
Fa la la, la la la, la la la
Ho ho ho, now I have a gun, right
Fa la la la la, la la la la
Now the snow falls on the wreckage below
Fa la la, la la la, la la la
Family reunited in the glow
Fa la la la la, la la la la
Evil thwarted on this holy eve
Fa la la, la la la, la la la
Die Hard Christmas, we believe!

Yippee-ki-yay, Mother Christmas all!
Fa la la la la, la la la la
From the party start to Hans Gruber’s fall!
Fa la la la la, la la la la
Peace on Earth, with an American yell
Fa la la, la la la, la la la

Vivek’s Annual X® Mass Meltdown: Second Verse, Same As The First

“It’s a core meltdown, sir.  It can’t be stopped.” – Galaxy Quest

Is your refrigerator running?  If so, Ohioans may want to vote for it. (All memes as found in responses to Vivek’s tweets®)

As we slide into the end of 2025, Vivek Ramaswamy is at it again, melting down into a puddle on X™ like a little brown chocolate Easter rabbit in a sauna.  Last year right around this time, Vivek was preaching that Americans are lazy sacks of mediocrity who need a flood of immigrants to save us from our own couch-potato culture.

In December 2024, Vivek dropped a bombshell thread on X®, blaming American culture for “venerating mediocrity over excellence” since (at least) the ‘90s, you know, when he was 10.  Ramaswamy ranted about how we celebrate prom queens over math whizzes, jocks over valedictorians, and then made bizarre sitcom references.

His fix?  Import more foreign-born people like, well, Vivek.

Because why?

Because, apparently, native Americans (not the feathered kind, the lazy you and me kind) can’t hack it.  “Our American culture has venerated mediocrity over excellence for way too long,” he tweeted, as if the country that broke the sound barrier was built by sleepover parties and mall hangs.

The H-1Bs arrived starting in the 1990s.  They didn’t build America.  We didn’t need them to rescue us from squalor.  They were an economic invasive species who flocked here because America was already great.

This year the blue monkey god he worships must have whispered in his ear, “It’s time, Vivek, make them hate you.”

Vivek is doubling down, insisting that no one is more American than anyone else.  Blood doesn’t matter, loyalty to . . . I guess ‘90’s sitcoms . . . does.

The Wilder family tree is rooted deeper in American soil than a sequoia, so I’ll beg to differ.  My ancestors have been buried in the United States for 250 years, fighting in every scrap from the Revolution to WWII.

Vivek?  He’s a first-gen Hindu anchor baby whose parents, even today, aren’t American citizens. He really does worship a blue monkey god (Hanuman, for the uninitiated), I’m not making that up.  Vivek, despite being tied to the United States neither by culture, blood, religion, or duration is lecturing us on what makes someone “American.”

This is irony thicker than his mother’s accent.

As I write this, Vivek’s second annual X® tantrum is in full swing.  Running (currently losing) for Governor of Ohio, he’s gone into full defense mode.  “Blood doesn’t make you American, loyalty does,” he posts, all while defending legal immigrants as often “the most American of us all.”

I’ll let you marinate on that one for a bit.

But here’s the rub: Vivek’s definition of Americanism is so broad it’s borderless.  If it’s just about swearing allegiance and buying into “ideals” like consumerism and sacred cultural events like Toyotathon™, then every person on the planet is an American who just hasn’t hopped the fence yet.

Forget cultures that clash with ours, like those that prioritize caste (in his book, Vivek proudly notes he’s from the Brahmin caste) over equality, or Sharia over the Constitution.

Many immigrant cultures are absolutely antithetical to the American ethos the Founding Fathers baked in.  Those guys weren’t dummies; they knew ancestry, culture, and religion were key to cohesion.

Jefferson warned about importing “principles adverse to freedom.”

Franklin fretted over Germans diluting the Anglo-Saxon stock, imagine what he’d think about Vivek.

They built a nation for “ourselves and our posterity,” not a global Airbnb® for anyone with a passport stamp.  Vivek’s self-serving schtick reeks of opportunism.  He’s a biotech billionaire who made his fortune through what looks an awful lot like pump and dump schemes. Remember Axovant™?  His Roivant® spinoff hyped a failed Alzheimer’s drug that he bought for pennies, went public in a splashy IPO, and tanked when trials flopped.

This netted Vivek millions while investors ate dirt.  Sounds familiar?  It’s like Martin Shkreli’s pharma bro antics, but bigger and with better PR.  Critics call it a “Wall Street speculator scam,” fleecing folks just like those Indian phone scammers who promise to fix your computer for a Playstation® gift cards.

Vivek’s version?  Promise miracle drugs, pump the stock, dump before reality hits.  Billions in the bank, ethics in the toilet, I mean, if he owns one.

And now he wants to govern Ohio?

Good luck selling that to Buckeye voters who value straight shooters over slick operators.

The irony is, Vivek’s behavior does more to stoke distrust of Indians than any redneck rant ever could.  By shoving his “I’m as American as apple pie” narrative down our throats while ignoring cultural clashes, he alienates the very heartland he’s courting.  Ohioans aren’t buying it.

Polls show the race tightening, but with AG Dave Yost calling the GOP endorsement of Vivek a “wrong choice,” and Democrats like Amy Acton gearing up, his path looks rockier than the Appalachians.

A Hindu lecturing Christians on American identity?  In a state where churches outnumber tech startups?

He can’t win.

His meltdowns highlight the divide: America isn’t just ideals; it’s blood, soil, and shared history. Dilute that, and you get chaos.

What portends when this bubble bursts?  Vivek’s campaign will fizzle like his drugs in trials.  But the bigger fallout: his rhetoric erodes trust in assimilation.  His little kids have Star Wars® names and worship a blue elephant god.  I’ve said forever, if you didn’t consider naming your kid “Brandon” or “Jason” you’re clearly not American, and that takes roots that are about three generations deep.

If “loyalty” trumps culture, why stop at legal immigrants?

Why not amnesty everyone?

It’s a slippery slope to turning America into a mini-UN, where clashing values breed division. The Founders knew better:  cohesion requires common roots.

Vivek’s vision?  It’s a balkanizing civil war in the making.

In the end, meltdowns like Vivek’s are built on illusions:  that America is just a proposition nation, no heritage required.  But as my family’s graves attest, it’s more.  He’s increasing dislike of Indians faster than a bad curry, all while scamming his way to the top.

Ohio deserves better. We’ve seen this show before (cough Obama cough) and know that electing someone who is clearly not American won’t make America better, but instead just leave little brown puddles everywhere.

 

Nothing to do with Deer: Sunday Country Second Amendment

Sometimes it’s a chorus, sometimes it’s just a phrase that’s the start of a song.  This was the phrase that became the title.

Behind The Music:
All the songs so far are here (LINK).  Still working on the downloadable stuff.

Nothing to do with Deer
By John Wilder

In the heart of the city where man becomes prey
Weak and evil men want to take guns away
But listen up close, if you want to understand,
About the world that you’ll live in, if guns are banned

It’s not exactly a gun problem, hear me say,
It’s thugs with long records, gettin’ their way.

Judges lettin’ killers walk without a fight,
Bail ’em out quick, boy, ignorin’ what’s right
Gun-free zones? Just unarmed victim traps,
Where the criminals strike and the evil snap.

Let me make somethin’ perfectly clear,
The Second Amendment has nothin’ to do with deer.

Twisted judges let the mad ones roam,
Repeat offenders tearin’ up our home
It’s folks with dark pasts or minds in a twist,
Not men and women just trying to exist.

Your family’s at risk to judges without a spine,
But a gun in your hand keeps the danger in line.

Judges lettin’ killers walk without a fight,
Bail ’em out quick, boy, ignorin’ what’s right.
Gun-free zones? Just unarmed victim traps,
Where the bad guys strike and the evil snap.

I say again, Let me make somethin’ perfectly clear,
The Second Amendment has nothin’ to do with deer.

Look over to England, where a father’s head hangs,
His daughter’s innocence lost to grooming gangs
Evil men rise up when the people can’t fight,
But here we’re armed strong, holdin’ back that night.

Don’t let ’em fool you, your rights keep you free,
From shadows that creep, protecting you and me

So stand for your freedom, don’t back down,
They’ll find out, if they mess around,
When trouble comes knockin’ at your front door,
You’ll be ready to answer, even the score.

It’s ’bout protectin’ what’s yours in the fray,
Gun rights save innocent lives every day.

Judges lettin’ killers walk without a fight,
Bail ’em out quick, boy, ignorin’ what’s right.
Gun-free zones? Just helpless victim traps,
Where the bad guys strike and the evil snap.

If you missed, it, let me make somethin’ perfectly clear,
The Second Amendment has nothin’ to do with deer.

You know, the truth is, we ain’t got a gun problem . . .
And if you want to talk about common sense gun laws,
Let’s talk about common sense voter laws first

Somalisota: Saturday Song

Ahhh, Somalisota, filled with Scandinavian traditions like Medicaid fraud, childcare fraud, autism fraud, and immigration fraud.  How would that look to a Somalian who is getting the benefit of, perhaps, $8 billion in illegal benefits while recreating Mogadishu on the Mouth of the Mississippi?

Well, like paradise!

Aren’t you pleased that they’ve been able to live their dreams?

Behind The Music:
All the songs so far are here (LINK).  Still working on the downloadable stuff.

Down in Somalisota
by John Wilder
(apologies to the Beach Boys)

Autism,
Child care,
Ooh, we wanna scam ya
Jihad,
Sharia,
Ohh, we want to kill ya
Charity, Medicaid, baby, you’ve been played

Oooh-ohhh, it’s North of Iowa
There’s a place called Somalisota
That’s where you wanna go to

Steal it all

Way down in Somalisota

And bodies in the sand,
Infidel blood melting in your hand
We’ll be falling in love to the rhythm of a
Drive by shooting,

Down in Somalisota

Ilhan Omar, ooh,
Her brother wants to take her
For a green card,
Far away from the Coast Guard

Oh-ohhhh, it’s to the east of Dakota

Ooh, I wanna take you down to Somalisota
We’ll get there fast and then we’ll start a quota
We’ll definitely avoid the Lakota

Way down in Somalisota

Minneapolis, not at all Annapolis
We’ll cut down a tree and we’ll perfect bomb chemistry
By and by we’ll live on welfare and defy all the laws

Afternoon stealing, and moonlit double dealing
That dreamy look under your veil
As they give me a zero dollar bail

Way down in Somalisota

Autism,
child care,
Ooh, we wanna scam ya
Jihad,
Sharia,
Ohh, we want to kill ya
Charity, Medicaid, baby, ohh you’ve been played

Oooh-ohhh, north of Iowa
There’s a place called Somalisota
That’s where you wanna go

To steal it all

Way down in Somalisota

We’ll get there fast and then we’ll start a quota
We’ll definitely avoid the Lakota
Way down in Somalisota

Autism,
Child care,
Ooh, we wanna scam ya
Jihad,
Sharia,
Ohh, we want to kill ya
Charity, Medicaid, baby, ohh you’ve been played

Oooh-ohhh, north of Iowa
There’s a place called Somalisota
That’s where you wanna go

To steal it all

Way down in Somalisota

Autism,
Child care,
Ooh, we wanna scam ya
Jihad,
Sharia,
Ohh, we want to kill ya
Charity, Medicaid, baby, ohh you’ve been played

We’ll get there fast and then we’ll start a quota
We’ll definitely avoid the Lakota
Way down in Somalisota

Down in Somalisota . . . .

2025 In Review: The Wilder Way

“You’re up for review.” – Fight Club

I wrote a review of why graphs should use wider lines.  It’s called, “The Plot Thickens”.

As an annual feature of Wilder, Wealthy and Wise, we poll our writers and editors and ask them to nominate the top stories of the year.  Since they are just me, it’s a far less complex process than you might imagine.  Here are the top stories of 2025:

January 2025

  1. Donald Trump is inaugurated as the 47th U.S. President.  Trump immediately issues executive orders on immigration, trade, and withdrawing from international agreements like the Paris Accord.  Alexandria Occasional-Cortex protests, “I didn’t even know the French could pronounce ‘Honda®’, I mean, wouldn’t it sound like ‘Onda?  So we should let them have an Accord®.  It’s a sensible car.”
  2. Wildfires ravage Greater Los Angeles, destroying over 13,000 structures, prompting evacuations and a state of emergency.  Governor Gavin “Reptile Smile” Newsom declares homeowners may rebuild that the land will be confiscated and given to people that buy him nice things.
  3. Bulgaria and Romania join the Schengen Area, lifting land border controls in Europe.  Bulgaria is still awaiting its first visitor and has the crepe paper decorations and everything along with party poppers and a 10% discount coupon to Bob’s Bulgarian Borscht, Baguette and Baklava Buffet®.
  4. Liechtenstein legalizes same-sex marriage, becoming the 37th country to do so, and demands to be known as Gay Liechtenstein.

February 2025

  1. Trump imposes 25% tariffs on imports from Canada and Mexico, and 10% on China, sparking retaliatory measures and trade tensions.  Trump then immediately lowers them, noting, “I shot the tariff, but I did not shoot the subsidy.”
  2. China retaliates with export controls and tariffs on U.S. imports amid escalating trade war, threatening to send more TEMU® products and advertisements if the U.S. does not relent.
  3. Canada wins the 2025 4 Nations Face-Off hockey tournament against the U.S.  Nic Cage and John Travolta are unavailable for comment.
  4. The Taliban visit Japan for first diplomatic engagement since 2021 as the Japanese noted they were no longer talibanned.

March 2025

  1. Trump pauses U.S. military aid to Ukraine after tensions with Zelensky when Zelensky wouldn’t eat his peas at dinner.
  2. Romanian protests erupt against election annulment, supporting the far-right one candidate who doesn’t Romanians replaced by Syrians.
  3. The Nagoya High Court in Japan rules non-recognition of same-sex marriage unconstitutional, primarily because of military pressure from Gay Liechtenstein.
  4. Trump increases tariffs on Chinese imports to 20%.  Or 60%.  Or 200%.  Can’t keep track.
  5. India launches missiles into Pakistan after a terrorist attack, escalating border tensions over regional fights against body hygiene, deodorant requirements, and who had first scamming rights over Oregon.

April 2025

  1. Trump imposes sweeping tariffs on imports from multiple countries, escalating global trade wars.  Or lowers them.  Or maybe doesn’t change anything at all.  I can’t remember.
  2. Pope Francis dies at 88 after mentioning he had inside information about Clinton crimes.
  3. China increases tariffs on U.S. exports to 84% in retaliation.  Or lowers them.
  4. South Korean President Win Won Soon impeached and removed and sent to Alabama to coach football.

May 2025

  1. Robert Prevost elected as Pope Leo XIV in the papal conclave, narrowly edging out Grammy®-nominated artist Taylor Swift.
  2. Germany’s AfD designated as extremist because it objects complete replacement of Germans by 2032, instead demanding it be put back to at least 2040.
  3. Japan allows bears in urban areas to be shot by hunters, as long as the bears are not gay, though the hunters can be gay and are encouraged to be vegan.

June 2025

  1. Protests erupt in Los Angeles over ICE deportations, leading to clashes and National Guard deployment and threats of military intervention from the Grand Gay Dutchy of Gay Liechtenstein.
  2. The U.S. intervenes in the Israel-Iran conflict by bombing Iranian nuclear facilities, which is less an intervention and more of a bombing.
  3. No Kings protests occur across U.S., Canada, Europe, Japan, and Mexico against Stephen King, Larry King, King’s Hawaiian Rolls® and King Kong™.
  4. An Air India© flight crashes in Ahmedabad, killing 242, proving that Indians can manage to kill more Indians than Pakistan can.  Prime Minister Modi proclaims:  “India Global Superpower 2030!”

July 2025

  1. Republicans pass sweeping tax changes through reconciliation in U.S. Congress.  No one is sure what is in them but the lobbyists say that it’ll be great.
  2. The International Court of Justice® (Superman presiding) rules countries can sue over historical greenhouse gas emissions.  White Americans immediately sue the descendants of black slaves for greenhouse reparations, noting that if they really were the ones who built America, it’s time for them to pay up.

August 2025

  1. OpenAI® releases GPT-5™.  Sam Altman celebrates by sacrificing a small child, but the evil god he worships rejects it because, “It’s not really a sacrifice because he does it every Tuesday.”
  2. The Russia-U.S. summit at Joint Base Elmendorf in Anchorage focused on the Ukraine conflict, got nothing done, but did have a nice burger and a promise to meet up again “in a week or two, you know, I’ve got a lot of stuff going on”.
  3. Air Canada© flight attendants strike to ban requiring stewardesses to serve in-flight beverage service to Indians hanging on the wings.
  4. Anti-immigration rallies in Australia lead to clashes against the evil white people who are totally not being replaced by the hundreds of thousands of refugees brought in to replace them.

September 2025

  1. The French government collapses after no-confidence vote.  Again.
  2. The Grand Gay Dutchy of Gay Liechtenstein demands the return of their gay crown jewels from France.  France protests, noting, “We’re not exactly sure where Liechtenstein is.”

October 2025

  1. In the U.K., Sarah Mullally becomes the first female Archbishop of Canterbury and immediately offers apology for all Christians resistance to moslem grooming gangs, noting, “It’s really white privilege to expect to not be sexually violated by short swarthy men with no upper body strength.”
  2. Grand Duke Henri of Luxembourg abdicates as the Gay Grand Gay Dutchy of Gay Liechtenstein attacks and begins to consolidate a European Homohegemony.

Why did Bing® A.I.® put Manson in the picture?

November 2025

  1. Canada’s measles-free status revoked.  Which is weird, because they had been measles-free since 1998.  Wonder how that could have happened?  No reason at all, I guess.  Odd coincidence that some of the highest measles rates in the world are in India.
  2. The Saskatchewan Roughriders win the Grey Cup.  Whoever and wherever they are, and whatever that it.

December 2025

  1. Trump’s economic approval hits a new low at 36%, but that only fills him with strength, and he decided to annex Antarctica and name it New Greenland.
  2. Sanae Takaichi becomes Japan’s first female prime minister, and immediately begins plotting to re-take Manchuria after tidying up a bit and doing some dishes.
  3. The Gay Grand Gay Dutchy of Gay Liechtenstein cedes the Gay Presidency of Europe to The Trans Republic of Trans Transylvania.
  4. Thieves steal priceless jewelry from the Louvre in France, but after they’re caught and determined to be moslem, are then given a key so they can loot whenever they want.

What a year!

What did I miss?