COVID – Page 16 – Wilder, Wealthy, and Wise

Your Economy, Featuring: Romans, Rothschilds, and Rioters

“You have two settings-no decision and bad decision. I wouldn’t let you run a bath without having the Coast Guard and the fire department standing by, but yet here you are running America. You are the worst thing that has happened to this country since food in buckets and maybe slavery!” – Veep

I had made a mistake and bought too many art supplies. That was my excess stencil crisis.

Cui bono. That’s Latin for “who benefits,” and in this case doesn’t have anything to do with the singer for the band U2©, who have been benefiting from everything. Even my GPS is branded by U2™, and it sucks. The streets have no name, and I still haven’t found what I’m looking for.

Cui bono.

That quote being in Latin is especially appropriate for today’s post. Marcus Licinius Crassus (115 B.C. – 53 B.C. – they aged backwards then) goes down in history for creating the first fire department that Rome had. At his own expense, he recruited and trained a brigade of 500 men who, at the first sign of a fire, would speed toward the smoke and flames.

Crassus would rush to the fire with them. Once the fire department was on site, Crassus would find the building owner and offer to buy the burning building at an obvious discount. I am not making this up. Obviously, the longer the fire went on, the lower Crassus’ offer would go. Once the property owner had sold, Crassus would give the signal and his fire department would save his newly purchased building.

I’m sure that sometimes the fire got away from him, but most of the time Crassus profited from the deal. It was a fire sale, right?

When I was working as a firefighter, in one building all that was left was the bottom of a shoe – it must have been the sole survivor.

Often, Crassus would then rebuild the building using his army of slave architects and artisans (not making that up, either), and then lease the building back to the original owner. So, Crassus even had a way to get his money back. Crassus was wealthy not only by ancient standards, but by any standards. He’d be worth at least $11 billion in today’s money.

Cui bono? Crassus. I looked for a name I could call Crassus, but it was hard to find one, this being a family-friendly blog. I’ll settle on cullion.

This is an early example of economic plunder. Legal, yes. Honorable? No.

It didn’t stop with Crassus.

I once paid $20 to meet the Prince, but I partied like it was only $19.99.

When you search the Internet for tales of Nathan Rothschild back in 1815, you’ll find a host of stories that from the scholarship of 2020, don’t seem to be supported. But what generally seems to be agreed with (even by the Rothschild Archives – LINK) is that during the Napoleonic Era, Rothschild and his brothers across the European continent had a fairly sophisticated system to transfer news and information to each other.

Information is just like a building fire in Rome: the sooner you catch it, the more it is worth.

What had been vexing everyone in London during June of 1815 was the return of Napoleon from exile and his resumption of power in France. Since Europe had been fighting alongside Napoleon or with Napoleon for nearly 20 years, people in the United Kingdom were scared to death that a victory by Napoleon could lead to another 20 years of war. And just like today, no one wanted to watch a re-run.

Napoleon broke out of exile because he needed more Elba room.

Lord Wellington had been put in charge of a coalition of armies from across Europe, 68,000 total troops. Joined by 50,000 Prussians under Blücher (cue obligatory whinny), Wellington met Bonaparte at the small village of Waterloo. Napoleon wasn’t alone. He had 73,000 French soldiers, and Wellington had left his panzers in his other coat, so the French fought back like they’d have to shower and give up cigarettes if they lost.

Spoiler alert: Napoleon lost, but barely. I think it had to go into at least one overtime, and there were some controversial instant replays.

The story goes that with the Rothschild information network, Nathan was notified about Wellington’s victory before anyone in London. By knowing that, Nathan could make a killing in the stock market. How well did he do? We don’t know. His courier wrote him: “I am informed by Commissary White that you have done well by the early information which you had of the Victory gained at Waterloo.” It is reported (LINK) that the Rothschild fortunes went from £500,000 to £1,000,000 in that year. So probably pretty well, since I assume a £ is a metric $ or something.

Yes, I know that there are other stories about Nathan’s Big Day Out® that are much more exaggerated, but this one does fine in proving my point: the best time to make money is in an uncertain market. Or, as has been attributed to Nathan: “The time to buy is when there’s blood in the streets.” Especially if, like Nathan and Marcus, you can remove the uncertainty and make your bet a sure thing.

I did invest in an Asian/Middle East fusion restaurant called, “Wok Like an Egyptian.”

This went on during Roman times, and it went on during Napoleonic times. Is it going on today?

It certainly is. I was having a conversation with a friend of mine the other week, and he works for a company that was funded by a private equity firm. Per my conversation, they deals that just his company is looking at are in the range of one hundred million to one billion dollars. Sure, that’s a pretty big range. But the kicker was this:

“There are pools of billions of dollars waiting for deals.”

What kind of deals? Deals on great assets in a collapsing economy.

As we look at the wreck that we’re seeing in the economy due to the WuFlu and now the great #BLM (Burning Looting Marxists), what sort of reaction are we seeing? Does it surprise anyone that 269 companies (LINK, H/T to CA at Western Rifle Shooters) are supporting the (actual, really founded by Marxists, look it up) BLM?

Does it surprise anyone that hundreds of millions of dollars are flooding in to BLM and affiliated organizations? And I’m not exaggerating the amount – the fund just for bailing out rioters and looters in Minneapolis was over $90 million dollars. Some people can loot a whole week and not make that much!

The support for BLM could be from one of the following sources, and I suspect that one or more is in play depending on the company donating:

Genuine support for civil rights. Sure, I believe that from companies that import goods made by overseas labor treated more poorly than the Wilder family treats our outdoor cat.
A cynical ploy signaling corporate virtue to get people to buy burgers. Think of it like an advertisement, but instead of featuring the social justice flavor of the week, it’s BLM this week.
Coordinated donations with full knowledge that the money will go toward a Marxist transformation of the United States.
Selected by the CEO’s secretary executive assistant at random.

I never let BLM members into my basement – I don’t want a whine cellar.

Amazon® has really been impacted by COVID-19. I’m betting that every facet of Bezos’ business has been helped, from their online shopping to their web infrastructure to their movie rental business. Coronachan has been good to Jeff. But I don’t blame Bezos for that – I don’t think it was his plan to infect the United States with a virus and convince everyone to stay in the basement for three months and then have seven pages of BLM merch to sell.

Because if he did? That’s some real Bond villain stuff and I’ve got to say, that’s the most anyone has ever done to try to convince me to buy a Prime® subscription.

Cui bono? I mean, besides Bezos?

Someone is going to profit from BLM, even beyond the hundreds of millions of dollars donated recently to it, and even beyond the billions of dollars that will go to purchase assets during the crisis. And it may not be money, or burger sales. It might be measured in raw power, the power to turn a society towards the Marxist goals of the founders of BLM.

But even Crassus knew that once a fire got started, it just might get away from you.

A Modest Proposal: Defund D.C.

“In an emotional address at the state capitol, Nebraska Governor Paul Burmaster made a public apology for his state being so flat.” – Hot Shots! Part Deux

If I could have a steak dinner with any historical figure, it would be Gandhi. More steak for me.

The Family Wilder was having dinner out a few weeks ago. We generally do that every Friday. Pugsley has OCD so he insists that we give the waitress what we want starting with the highest priced item first. It’s an extremely rare dish order. Of course, I kid.

As is our custom, before we go out for dinner we toss all of our cell phones on the table. We literally party like it’s 1999. Discussion takes place without the constraint of Internet-enabled fact checking. Rather than argue the facts, we agree to table that discussion until later, and can talk instead about pure ideas, like when The Boy decided that giving up spreadsheets forty days before Easter was an Excel® Lent idea.

Our conversation often travels into weird subjects, like it did that night. This is actually the combination of several conversations we’ve had over time. Being married for years means that a lot of what’s included in this conversation was said weeks or even years earlier, so it’s not exactly our dinnertime discussion.

John Wilder: “You know, part of the problem is Washington, D.C. is just in the wrong place. Sure, when the nation was founded it was smack in the middle of the 13 states. Now? It’s stuck on a seaboard, three thousand miles away from California, and 1,500 miles away from anything that could plausibly be called the center of the country.”

I want to ban the sale of pre-shredded cheese. Together, we can make America grate again!

The Mrs.: “Yes, plus all the lobbyists flock there. They spend huge amounts of money wining and dining Congress. Gotta get that bacon-wrapped shrimp.”

JW: “Yes! Plus the population there has just grown to love government. Heck, in 2016, 90.9% of the folks in Washington, D.C. voted for Hillary. Donald Trump got 4.1%. This doesn’t have remotely resemble the nation as a whole. It also explains why the Left was so surprised when he won. They probably don’t even know someone who voted for Trump. Though you could have made a fortune mining the salt from their tears.”

The Mrs.: “Perhaps there’s a better place for the capitol?”

JW: “Perhaps. How about Sioux Falls, South Dakota? I think it gets hot there in the summer, but also cold in the winter. If we just made sure the new capitol building had substandard heating and air conditioning . . . .”

The Mrs.: “And made sure that no hotel better than a Holiday Inn Express® could be built . . . .”

JW: “And made sure that all fancy parties had to be catered by Sonic®?”

It would be so nice if Sonic added an “e” to its name.

It was a fun thought – fancy lobbyists forced to eat chili-cheese tater tots instead of the previously mentioned bacon-wrapped shrimp. Perhaps the reason is that I, as an American citizen in the southern part of Northern Midwestia, have no real connection to the level of luxury and power that our Congresscritters experience on a daily basis.

It’s not just that. The power in Washington, D.C. has proven to be as attractive to Leftists as Jeffrey Epstein’s plane was to Bill Clinton.

I recall back in 2000 when some sort of group on the Right was thinking of marching on Washington, D.C. In the comments, one person asked, “Why would you want to go there? There is no one from the Right there. You’re travelling into enemy territory. If you want to protest, try Wyoming.”

Make no mistake about it, Washington, D.C. is enemy territory. Although everyone there isn’t a Leftist, it’s Leftist enough that wearing a Gadsden Flag t-shirt in a public location is probably not conducive to long term oxygen use here on Planet Earth. There’s a reason that Trump “inspected” the bunker as fires and riots were raging outside of the White House. I mean, riot season so early? I still have my COVID decorations up.

There were riots in Detroit, too. They caused $7 million in improvements.

Would that riot have happened in Sioux Falls? Or Hastings, Nebraska? Or Missoula, Montana? Or Bismarck, North Dakota? I think not.

Since the conversation that night, I had the idea that there’s no real reason that the United States needs to have a fixed capitol at all. Put the thing into a group of double-wide trailers and move it around from state to state – each state gets a shot to have the capitol for six months or so.

To make it even spicier, make sure that the cities the capitol lands in have populations of less than 300,000 or so and are more than two hours from a really big airport. Heck one month they could skip telling the New York delegation where they were going, just for giggles.

I tried to think of a social-distancing joke, but this was as close as I could get.

It wasn’t long after this conversation that I got an email from a reader suggesting exactly this same idea. “Defund D.C.” was the suggestion. I’d name them, but I didn’t have permission, but here’s a direct quote (with minor changes – style only):

“On January 21, 2021, start moving all Federal offices out of D.C. and Northern Virginia. Leave only small legislative liaison staffs, and establish new offices in currently red states. All national monuments in the area will continue to operate, if they charge admission and become self-sustaining without National Park Service funds.”

I’d add that we don’t want to burden Red States with a batch of imported Leftists, so the offices would be moved, and we could pick up new staff at the new locations. We could house most of them in empty big box retail stores and malls. Plenty of locals would like the jobs, but I worry that they’d be more efficient than the Leftists they replace and we might actually get the government we pay for.

All in all, I like the idea. Heck, anything we could do to reduce the power of the Federal government at this point, I’m for.

I once pushed a female mathematician into a swamp. She ended up with algae bra.

But I worry it’s too late.

When I look at the way that both sides have been spending money over the last twenty years, I am fairly certain that all of them go to parties where “deficits don’t matter” is written out on the buffet table in prosciutto ham wrapped asparagus. Beyond the financial stress, the political stress has been built up. To be clear, this political stress was built up when things were relatively good in the country. When things go bad financially?

Look out below, it’s a long way to drop.

Given that, it might be too late. But I will admit that it does make me smile when I think about Congresscritters bathed in rivers of sweat in July and having to give speeches in overcoats and mittens in November in double wide trailers on the Great American Prairie.

It might not solve anything.

But it sure would be amusing.

You’re Not Alone

“Théoden King stands alone.” – Lord of the Rings

Google® is so biased they only ranked our Solar System one star.

Originally this was going to be an economic post (as is usual for Wednesday) about Crisis Capitalism and how this particular Crisis, like many others in the past will be used to concentrate wealth even more, perhaps with bikini graphs. Maybe the bikinis get smaller as the economy shrinks? At least that would bring some good out of the current crisis. Plus I’ll always be known as “the guy who made economics interesting at last.”

That post will have to wait until next Wednesday.

What hit me today was an onslaught of news. Not one story, but nearly every story I read was about deplatforming or attempting to silence alternative viewpoints to the conventional narrative as seen on TV. In rapid-fire, I saw stories about deplatforming of news and opinion outlets, deplatforming of individuals and doxing (making private personal information public of non-public figures) of pre-teens(!) for thoughtcrime.

Heck, there was even a Serbian soccer player (playing soccer for an American pro soccer team) that was fired (after he was made to apologize) for comments his wife made on social media. And his wife made those comments in Serbian. I guess that he should have done his manly best and kept her home without access to electronic media devices? Is the message that athletes should take away from this is that they should keep their women on a shorter leash?

Is this the Left telling men that they need to be more patriarchal and tell their women to be seen and not heard?

But his wife wanted to go anyway.

But the seemingly disjointed activities all had one purpose: to make you feel alone.

The biggest story is that Zero Hedge® was cut off from Google® advertising revenue. Since ZH™ is a for-profit company, this will hurt them. Why was it cut off? The story I saw indicated that it was because people commenting on the site were being less than politically correct. And, yes, Google® has the legal right to do this, unless they did it because Zero Hedge© is transgender.

No, I don’t have examples, but these are commenters, not ZH© staff. I jumped in to see the comment section on a typical post that I thought might be incendiary. Would all the comments be safe to repeat at work? No. Have I seen worse comments on Twitter®? Yeah, a lot worse. I’ve seen worse commentary on Yahoo® news stories.

Zero Hedge™ has already been banned “permanently” once by Twitter©, and then reactivated. The reason given was that Zero Hedge® had “doxed” a Chinese researcher . . . by publishing information that was already on the Wuhan Institute for Creating COVID Virology’s website. As of now? They’re unbanned. Twitter© called it “an error.”

But it’s clear that they have made someone angry.

How much will it Google’s deplatforming cost Zero Hedge©?

I have no idea.

Google® did give a four star rating to Chernobyl. They would have given it five, but the locals ran out of fingers.

I do know that The Federalist™, another website was threatened with Google® demonetization due to comments on articles like this one (LINK). The Federalist© just shut off comments entirely.

And that just might be the point.

Comments here are (generally) fairly unmoderated. I think that outside of auto-moderated comments, I’ve nuked only one or two comments out of thousands during the life of this blog. I am blessed with some of the smartest, most well read, and politest commenters on the planet. You’re also probably the most physically attractive commenters on any website in existence, and I bet you all have impeccable armpit hygiene to boot. But the comment section gives people a chance to talk to each other, bounce ideas off each other, and get to know each other. It also is a little light on a dark Internet letting you know that you’re not alone.

Even the people who don’t comment benefit from the comments section. For each person who comments, at least 100 other readers don’t comment. But they read what you say. And it’s important to them, and lets them know that they’re not alone, either.

Then there’s Laura Towler.

Laura is a British YouTuber® who is on the Right. On June 6, she sent the following Tweet® and got the reply that follows it:

“Chuffed” is slang that means “happy as a poodle with a pudding pop.”

This all went international. The idea that a company would be so “brave” as to come out in favor of a group that is only supported to the tune of tens of millions of dollars by the largest tech companies and most of the largest news companies is really risky.

To boot, Yorkshire Tea© then picked on a (nearly) unknown individual citizen. Brave, indeed – I’m sure that Laura is quite the power to be reckoned with given her 50,000 or so YouTube™ subscribers. And Yorkshire Tea® is so small, being the biggest selling tea in Great Britain (which made 5.5 billion tea bags last year).

It’s like Coca-Cola® decided to pick on some kid going to prom.

But it led me to ask this question: Did any of the companies that sponsor BLM even bother to go to the BLM website?

Outside of the cringing references to “comrades” and “collectivism” on the BLM website, they note that BLM wishes to:

“disrupt the Western-prescribed nuclear family” and “collectively” care for one another.
They also want to [free themselves] “from the tight grip of heteronormative thinking.”

This is not the language of a civil rights program, it’s the language of a communist front masquerading as a civil rights program. And it’s not even Halloween yet, and I think that all of the cosplay conventions are on Coronahold.

What’s the best way to kill communists? Communism.

We’ve seen that at C.H.A.Z. and virtually every other protest activity that BLM is tied tightly to Antifa. Imagine that C.H.A.Z. wasn’t six blocks being held by armed Leftists, and instead was being held by a militia from the Right. I’d imagine we’d see National Guard Apache helicopters and the Seattle mayor calling for a neutron bomb strike to make the Hug Box of Seattle safe again.

I’m sure someone will bring up the Wildlife Refuge seizure by members of the Right in 2016. But 26 of the occupiers of the Wildlife Refuge were charged with felonies. Care to take bets on if the C.H.A.Z. occupiers will face any criminal charges? Any of them?

Ms. Towler was able to handle the media storm that followed, and not apologize. Heck, her Twitter® feed now cheekily shows “Disavowed by Yorkshire Tea©” as the lead line. That takes style.

But Laura knew she wasn’t alone, and has weathered international condemnation.

It doesn’t stop there.

Russians call their website censoring the Inter-nyet.

The classic (and very boring) movie Gone With The Wind, the television shows of COPS®, Live PD™, and an episode of (the very funny) Fawlty Towers that first aired on October 24, 1975 have since been either hidden or cancelled. Just like statues, these works of art define who we are as a people. And removing them makes us not more, but less.

Every person who has a statue made out of him has something in common with those works of art – they have faults, especially when viewed through the lens of the 2020s. And removing them or hiding them or tearing them down with mob violence is meant to make you feel alone.

If you’re against police corruption and militarization? You’re not alone.

If you’re against excessive use of force by police? You’re not alone.

If you’re against rioting and mob violence? You’re not alone.

If you mock companies that virtue signal popular causes while avoiding tough issues like the near slave labor they use to produce goods that they offshored from American production? You’re not alone.

If you’re against globalism and collectivism? You’re not alone.

I’m not saying that the position of the Right is always the right position. There are times the Right has been wrong. But the positions of the Right aren’t based in hate – they’re based in a love of freedom, or family, or tradition, or nation, or a healthy desire to be religious.

If those things are important to you?

You’re not alone.

And if you suffer from paranoia, you’re not alone. There’s someone behind you.

If you want this nonsense to stop so you can see economic graphs featuring bikinis?

You’re not alone.

Civil War 2.0 Weather Report: The Tsunami Begins, But You Knew That

“If we can stop him, we shall prevent the collapse of Western Civilization. No pressure.” – Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows

I liked the ticking of the clock I got from the pawnshop, but in the end it was a second-hand emotion.

People actively avoid being near those of opposing ideology. Might move from communities or states just because of ideology.
Common violence. Organized violence is occurring monthly.
Opposing sides develop governing/war structures. Just in case.
Common violence that is generally deemed by governmental authorities as justified based on ideology.
Open War.

In the first issue of the Civil War Weather Report, I put together ten steps to a new civil war. I did not expect that on the one year anniversary of that first report we’d move from step 6 nearly to step 9. Step 9. is, of course, two minutes to midnight.

We are very, very close. I debated internally more than a bit whether we were at an 8. or a 9. this month. I finally decided to stay at an 8., despite multiple jurisdictions doing everything but arming the rioting faction of the protest movement with automatic firearms and bullhorns that make them all sound like Gilbert Gottfried. It is clear we are at least an 8., and you will see in the graphs section that our Wilder Violence Index has reached new highs.

In this issue: Front Matter – You Knew Where This Was Going – Violence and Censorship Update – Updated Civil War 2.0 Index – Balkans or Caesar Might Be The Best Case Scenario – Links

Welcome to Issue 12 of the Civil War II Weather Report. These posts are different than the other posts at Wilder Wealthy and Wise and consist of smaller segments covering multiple topics around the single focus of Civil War 2.0, on the first or second Monday of every month. I’ve created a page (Link) for links to all of the past issues.

You Knew Where This Was Going

The most popular posts on this site have been about the political state of the country. The Civil War Weather Reports aren’t my usual form of post, but have proven to be very popular. I’m sure it’s not just for graphs featuring bikinis. Well, at least not only because of the bikinis.

I think the reason these posts are popular is simple: many people could sense the fragile peak that it seems all of Western Civilization is perched on. Whether it is a conscious review of the surrounding culture or just a feeling in the pit of the stomach when confronted with an outrageous news article, something’s just not right. Society has been changing by increments over the years, but those changes are coming faster and faster and faster.

Claire Wolfe, the groundbreaking and iconic Freedom blogger said it very well at her place last week (LINK):

Each day I think I’ve processed the latest craziness enough to blog something coherent. Useful even. But then new waves of craziness wash over the world. I don’t know what to say. I can’t write good sense against the onslaught of the crazy. I don’t know how civilization is holding together under tsunamis of crazy.

But then, of course civilization isn’t holding together — and I’m not just talking about the one-two punch of totalitarian don’tleaveyourhouseism followed without pause by riotandlootallyouwantism.

Chains of rapid-fire events and chaos like this are not generally the friend of those that love freedom. The Russian Revolution promised:

Peace, through ending World War I,
Food, because Communists are well known to produce excess food,
Land, whereby peasants would get parts of land owned by the wealthy,
Minimum wages,
Maximum working hours,
Running factories by elected worker representatives and
Lots of other promises.

In the end, up to 12,000,000 people (mainly civilians) died in the civil war that followed, and the promises that were made were largely ignored. The Bolsheviks said and promised anything to get a force of disaffected behind them. Not sure if this sounds familiar to AOC fans?

Hey girl, are you the French Revolution? Because I keep imagining you sans-culottes.

I get a sense that the Left today is up to the same trick. They’ve “created” media events and have managed them to get power – political power and power in the street. Some of the Leftists may even be stupid enough to believe that there are magic economic levers that they can move to keep the promises they’re making. In reality, they really don’t care: it’s all about the power.

Lenin’s reintroduction into Russia and subsequent funding from foreign sources bring George Soros to mind. Soros continually funds groups in the United States that are directly opposed to actual freedom. The protesters and their associated rioters have a structure that has been funded and provisioned with everything from water and medical supplies to pre-staged bricks and gasoline. Not saying that George is funding those directly, but . . .

The Rule of Law: It’s not just for breakfast anymore.

“You used the law and a badge to heal that scar on your neck.” – Hang ‘em High

I would recommend him as a lawyer, but he told the judge he ate my appeal.

About 4,400 years ago, a Mesopotamian king by the name of Urukagina developed the first known civil laws. They certainly weren’t the first laws, but they are the first ones we have written proof of. Perhaps the biggest mystery of Urukagina is how he got through middle school with a name like Urukagina.

Law is the bedrock of human civilization. If we don’t have rules we all (more or less) agree to, we can’t live together. Sometimes the laws are complex: I’ve heard that it’s a law that you have to turn on your headlights if it’s raining in Sweden. I’m not sure how am I supposed to know if it’s raining in Sweden, so I guess I’m quite the rogue when choose to live on the edge and drive without my lights.

Sadly, everyone can see what happens when laws break down. The riots that started in Minnesota are an example that won’t be forgotten soon. The breakdown that started in Minnesota is currently still spreading across the United States. That’s not good. In my opinion, the only good riot is three dyslexics.

Laws are like money – they’re a virtual system. They exist only because we all agree that they exist – the same way that East Germany disappeared as soon as people stopped being afraid of it. As soon a majority of people in an area stop believing in them, laws are as worthless as Johnny Depp’s liver on the black market.

Johnny Depp told David Letterman he never watches his own movies. What a lucky guy.

The anti-police-violence riots were based on a winning argument that could have resonated all across the political spectrum – not allowing the police to use excessive force. Had the protesters brought out the cases of LaVoy Finicum and Daniel Shaver as additional examples, I think they would have been surprised at the support they got. Instead? They rioted, burned, and all they got was a free t-shirt from Target® and enough looted liquor to fuel the protest for the next night. Can’t go looting without a nice Natty Light®.

However, the protesters managed to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory. Most of the time, when cops are presented with that awful decision to pull out their gun and shoot, it’s justified. But the larger injustices are the ones we see when police do things that, if you or I were doing them, would put us in jail. Rather than engaging others with that simple and powerful point, they protested entirely through the lens of race. The protests escalated into riots. The violence and property damage have ironically made the case for the use of significant force in putting down the riots.

They were never serious about protesting against police violence.

It’s lucky for those that like living in a stable society that people generally like laws. They want to know where they stand and have a predictable society. Research has shown that people have an innate sense of justice – it’s something that we appear to have been born with. When the legal system works, it makes the Karen inside each one of us happy. We generally want people who do bad things to be punished. We want innocent people to go free. And we want Whoopi Goldberg to develop a decade-long case of laryngitis.

Looks like Minnesota picked the wrong week to stop snorting glue.

We’ve had good laws and bad laws during the time humanity has been on Earth, but regardless, the law represented a standard. The only reason that we grant the state a monopoly on the use of force is that we trust that the state is just as bound by the law as the people are. There’s a satisfying symmetry in that.

That shared submission to judgement based on law is what makes the law work in the first place. If a random citizen commits a crime and is punished, a member of the police committing the same crime should receive the same punishment. If a citizen commits a crime and a politician commits that same crime, the politician should receive the same punishment. Even if the law isn’t fair, it should be equally applied.

The cries of “drain the swamp” from the Right are a recognition that this really isn’t so – a politician or Federal bureaucrat can commit crimes that would send you or I to jail and never have to worry. There is ample evidence that there isn’t a single system of justice – there are three. One group follows the rules as best as they can, but could still be found guilty of obscure crimes. I just hope that if I’m ever in that position I have a great lawyer. A good lawyer knows the law. A great lawyer knows the judge.

If I lied in testimony before Congress, nice Federal attorneys would seek to take away my voting rights by making me a felon as they did with Roger Stone. If former CIA chief John Brennan does it? Well, it appears nothing happens. That’s the sort of immunity you get when you’re in the club.

In a rare moment of clarity for the FBI, Peter Strzok was fired. Don’t worry – he’s suing to be reinstated with back pay.

People have lost trust; that’s where we’re at as a nation. There appear to be three systems of law in the United States:

one for the favored elite, where they are untouchable,
one for police, where (sometimes) crimes are never investigated,
and one for everyone else.

It’s not that the favored elite have great lawyers and can use them to avoid being convicted. The favored elite is never even charged with a crime. Hillary Clinton admittedly broke laws, and the FBI further pointed out that she had broken laws. Charging her, however, was just not something that they wanted to do. They know how enemies of Hillary end up. Heck, 2 out 3 presidents that were impeached were impeached for embarrassing Hillary.

For all I know, the systems for the elites have been in place as long as the elite has been in place. But now it’s visible. Ford had to pardon Nixon so he wouldn’t be prosecuted. Obama appears to have gotten a hall pass from Attorney General William Barr – pardon not required. Congress is much the same: Charlie Rangel evaded Federal taxes to the tune of tens of thousands of dollars. At least.

Any member of the non-elite class would have been sent to jail. Obama is buying mansions; Charlie retired from Congress. Oh, Charlie got “censured” which I guess makes it all better. And Obama is stuck living with Michelle.

She might be mad that an immigrant took her job?

The Deep State is similar – members of the FBI can do pretty much whatever they want to do, as long as it doesn’t make the other elite folks unhappy. I talked to a former Federal banking regulator once who mentioned that the only real trouble he could have gotten into was if he tried to be tough on a big bank. Otherwise? He could have stayed there for years, doing not much of anything. The Deep State first and foremost protects its own.

Like the elite, the police have a different process, too. You or I would get arrested, but a cop gets to have his behavior examined administratively. By his buddies on the force. This is where the case is reviewed by the people who hired him to see if there was a violation of policy. Most of the time officers are cleared.

If you or I shot an intruder into our homes, we couldn’t just grab a group of people in our families to check to see if they thought we did the right thing. Nope. There would be independent review by a District Attorney to see if our actions were justified. If our actions were not justified? We would be charged with a crime. I hope my lawyer thinks I’m a penguin when going for bail – then he can tell the judge I’m not a flight risk.

Penguins don’t go to England – they don’t like to be that close to Wales.

I can absolutely understand the need to give officers benefit of the doubt, and I think a jury generally does. But if an officer can say “I was in fear of my life,” on the stand, it ought to work for me, too. I think the system with police accountability is broken. But I think it’s easier to fix than the problems with the elite.

Is there hope for our system? Perhaps. But unless the rule of law can be made to be truly impartial, we’re going to be in for a rough time.

It could be worse. It could have been me who was named Urukagina.

Scott Adams, Debt, and Economic CPR

“Could be worse. Could be raining.” – Young Frankenstein

I heard Joe Biden was thinking of having a horse for a vice president, to make the economy stable.

Scott Adams is the creator of Dilbert® and a close personal friend who I bonded with during the Olympic trials for rhythmic gymnastics. Okay, that’s not quite true. Scott’s a long-time acquaintance and we go to some of the same parties. Okay, that’s not quite true, either. Probably a more accurate statement is that I have quite a few of his books and he liked exactly two of my Tweets® back when I Twittered™ on a more regular basis.

The last one is actually true.

Anyway, Mr. Adams used to be a blogger, and had some interesting written posts over the years. Now, he spends more time doing a YouTube® show rather than blog (LINK). I listen to him a couple of times a month as I drive to work. I’d watch him, but the people on the sidewalk seem to mind. I guess I’m not as bad a driver as Helen Keller. But she had a real excuse, being a woman and all.

One comment I’ve heard Scott make at least twice during the COVIDanomic® crisis is that he’s optimistic about the economy restarting and taking right off. More or less he has said, “Unlike a war or some other catastrophe, everything we need for a successful economy is still sitting there. All we have to do is restart it.”

One thing I’ve enjoyed about Mr. Adams is that he’s incredibly perceptive, and the reason I listen to him is he’s a constant source of unique opinions. He was one of the first to pick Trump winning in 2016. Adams noticed the way Trump uses the language of persuasion and thought it would be the difference in the election. Me, I generally vote based on lawn signs, which is why I voted for my realtor last election.

Jeb was a pallbearer at his dad’s funeral, so he could let him down one final time.

Trump’s persuasion immediately frames and freezes the way people think about public figures. “Low energy Jeb (Bush),” and “Little Mike (Bloomberg)” were the verbal equivalents of public political homicide. Once Trump Tweeted® those phrases, ¡Jeb! and Little Mike could still campaign, but their chances of winning were the same as a belt made of watches – a waist of time.

So, when Mr. Adams speaks, I pay attention. New ideas are fairly rare and I like to steal mine while they’re fresh. As noted, many times he’s very perceptive in ways the news media forgot about being when they first caught Trump Derangement Syndrome. In this case, I think Scott is wrong. Everything may still be there, but you can no longer restart the economy to the previous levels than you could resuscitate Grover Cleveland by giving his corpse CPR. I mean, I can give CPR to a steak, but it still won’t moo.

Just like Grover Cleveland, everything is there, but putting him in a lawn chair and propping him up with a tropical cocktail (with umbrella) won’t really help. Everything’s there.

But it’s really not.

If only Grover Cleveland had Twitter®, I’m sure we’d still be laughing at the dank Benjamin Harrison memes.

Just like you can’t restart a heart after a few weeks of it sitting on the bedside table, you can’t restart an economy after months of it sitting dead in Coronapause©.

Let’s take the human body analogy a bit farther. A business is an organism. It consumes money and raw materials and produces goods and services as a byproduct. You could even call that byproduct a waste if it had anything to do with Kardashians. Companies eat metal and energy and use employee labor to pop out automobiles and beer and knee braces and fruitcake bloomers. And where would we be without fruitcake bloomers???

A lack of oxygen makes cells in your body die. No oxygen, no cells.

In business, a lack of money causes employees to die. Oops. They don’t die, they just don’t come in anymore, unless your business was in the Soviet Union, where ‘being terminated’ had an entirely different and completely Schwarzenegger-free meaning.

That lack of money for a business is called debt, and debt is what kills an economy. Just as weak people like The Mrs. complains that she needs a constant supply of oxygen after being stuck in the car with me after a week-long backpacking trip, debt is a mechanism to make sure that people and companies require a constant flow of money.

Why would a company be in debt?

Well, for small ones, the same reason that you or I would go into debt, namely because they don’t have the money to pay for everything up front. Debt can also provide money for the business to grow.

And moderate sized companies that you can buy on the stock market nearly have to be in debt. Without debt, a guy from New York would buy them out using the cash that the company had hanging around for a rainy day. They even have a name for this – a leveraged buyout (LBO). In an LBO, the person buying the company buys it with money that he borrowed against company he’s buying.

It sounds complicated, but it’s really not. An LBO is the same thing that happens when you sell your house. The person buying the house uses the house as the basis of the loan to buy the house from the owners.

And good news, it’s already several trillion higher than this!

But in the case of the company being bought out, the resulting company after the LBO is actually weaker and more likely to fail since it’s now saddled with debt. Just because you can borrow the money doesn’t mean you should borrow the money.

Giant sized companies don’t face this problem nobody but Jeff Bezos has enough money to buy his stake in Amazon®, plus he’d send his android double to come kill you if you tried to buy the company or made fun of his girlfriend. Apple® is similarly large, so they can have billions of dollars in cash on the books, too, but Apple™ doesn’t have a girlfriend. Yet.

The chain of death of a business in after WuFlu looks something like this:

Lockdowns stop businesses from being open, which
Stops the money coming to Employees so,
Employees stop buying, therefore
Businesses don’t have money.

Keep this cycle up for two months and in some cases you’ve used up more reserves than the business has. The result is either more debt, which the business still can’t pay because debt is the problem in the first place, or bankruptcy.

Well, TP is one problem that’s been wiped out.

The same cycle can be seen with landlords.

A dollar owed for rent isn’t owed to a random person,
It’s often owed to a person who has a mortgage against the property, and
If the rent isn’t paid, many times the landlord can’t pay his
But when the landlord can’t pay the mortgage, the bank isn’t paid.

If you’re worried about the bank, don’t. The old saying is that “Debt is always paid, either by the borrower, or the lender.” In the case of banks, there’s the three Fed Amigos: the Federal government, the Federal Reserve™, and the Federal Deposit Insurance Corporation (FDIC).

The reason the FDIC was created was that banks failed faster and more frequently than FUNNY during the Great Depression. If people keep their money in Mason© jars in the backyard, it’s pretty hard for the other two Feds to track it, so they had to convince people the banks were safe.

They idea behind the FDIC is that if a bank goes bankrupt, the insurance will pay off the depositors. I was going to look up the total assets of the FDIC to see how big a crisis it could cover, but decided it was irrelevant. The Federal government (Treasury) or the Federal Reserve© or some group will simply print all of the money required to pay off the depositors.

I knew there was a reason that clowns scared me.

If my bank runs out of money? Well, the Fed will just lend them some. The FDIC is for amateur problems.

But lending money into a system where the primary problem is debt isn’t the solution, and it explains why things won’t just “start right up” after months where car sales are at 50% of last year, and airline flights are at 10% or less. The debt is the reason that the economy was able to fall so far, so fast. And you can’t loan more money to solve what is, at the core, a debt problem.

I do hope my close, personal friend Scott Adams is right. But I fear he’s wrong. But hey, we’ll always have those Olympic™ medals we won for rhythmic gymnastics.

COVID Nightmares: The Karen, The Mrs. Grundy, and the AWFL

“You see, in this world there’s two kinds of people my friend, those with loaded guns and those who dig. You dig.” – The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly

The Four Three Horsefaces of the Apocalypse. (Concept via JW, Photoshop via Pugsley, after an idea by Sergio Leone.)

“Okay, everyone, I’d like to welcome you all to this meeting of Karen Anonymous. Who would like to start?”

I raised my hand.

“Hi, I’m John, and I’m a Karen.”

The voices responded in unison, “Hi, John.”

“I’d like to tell you my story. Two weeks ago, my family ordered dinner. Due to the virus, we couldn’t go to the restaurant. They delivered. When they brought us the dinner, they forgot to bring the entrée for my son, The Boy.” I paused. “The Mrs. called them back and they said they would bring it. They forgot.”

Everyone in the room nodded. I could see the tension. This was fertile ground for a Karening.

“So, the following Friday, I suggested we order again from them. As The Boy was finding out what everyone wanted, he asked me if I wanted the Bigfoot roasted over moonrocks with a side of fried Dodo wings, which is my usual order. I told him, sure, it’s not like money is an object, but then I reminded him that they hadn’t brought his entrée the previous week. I told him we should get it for free.”

I looked at the rest of the KA members. I could see beads of sweat on a few brows. I could see a pulsating vein in the temple of one lady to my left.

If you’ve never seen a pack of Karens migrate, you don’t know true terror.

“The Boy said, point blank, ‘Dad, if you want to do that, if you want to call them up and tell them that, it’s fine. You go ahead and do that. But I won’t. You’re being a Karen about this.’ I was shocked. I asked him exactly how I was being a Karen, and he responded, ‘Dad, this is a small restaurant, not part of a big chain. The owner just bought it right before the virus hit. He’s being beaten up financially already. And now you want to bust his chops over an eight dollar chicken and rice dinner when we will never even notice eight dollars missing in our lives? No. I won’t do it.’

There were a few tears, and nods in the audience. I continued.

“Yes. I was being a Karen. I had lost perspective. And I was proud that The Boy called me on it. I realized right then: I don’t need to see the manager.”

Then they applauded, hugged me, and made me king of Lower Southeast Modern Mayberry.

What’s the point of having power if you don’t abuse it? That’s the last time the mailman will argue with me!

Okay, there isn’t a real Karen Anonymous, but The Boy really did call me out for being a Karen, and I was proud of him for doing so. But I’ll be damned if I’m going to stop wearing the crown around town.

Karen is pretty simple to explain, and in reality. We all know her. Her hairstyle alone tells us a lot. Karen wants things the way she wants them. And if she can’t have them her way? She’d like to see the manager.

That was me over The Boy’s entrée, which was the absolutely true part of the Karen Anonymous meeting. It didn’t matter that I was technically correct, as The Boy pointed out, in the bigger picture of the world I was absolutely wrong. The restaurant is small, locally owned, and has generally given us both great service and great food.

Is being a Karen morally wrong? No, not really. Karen is looking out for the best for her and her family, mostly. Would I like to be a husband to a constant Karen? No, it would be hard to decide who had to give birth to the kids.

Is it bad that the first thing I notice in this picture was the trigger discipline?

In the larger sense of things, Karens are harmless. Karens stop worrying about most everything after they’re happy. Sure, they might make noise, and they might be annoying FaceBook® friends, but if the manager has a designated employee to pretend to “fire” when Karens are on the warpath, Karens are happy. They rule their own little world. They have no real reason to mess with you, they just want things to go well for them.

Karen memes are peaking right now, so I feel safe in saying that we’ve reached Peak Karen™. Heck, I bet in a few years it will be safe again for middle-aged women to wear the “can I speak to the manager” haircut without fear of becoming an Internet meme.

The second personality type that the WuFlu has brought to the forefront are the Mrs. Grundys. Where the Karen is concerned about Karen, Mrs. Grundy is concerned about you.

Who is Mrs. Grundy?

Mrs. Grundy is Karen’s great-great-grandma who entered the English language in 1798. Mrs. Grundy is obsessed with the rules. The smaller and more petty and more obscure and meaningless, the better. But if it were just Mrs. Grundy following the rules, that would be okay. No. It’s worse. Mrs. Grundy wants you to be observant to the rules, and has appointed herself judge, jury, and executioner. Me? I say before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way you have his shoes and you’re a mile away.

The judge told me I was in court for drinking and kissing women. I don’t think he was pleased when I said, “Excellent! When do we start?”

Your grass is ever so slightly too tall? Mrs. Grundy is calling the Home Owners’ Association (HOA). But more likely, Mrs. Grundy is running the HOA. She’s and her fellow Grundys are the first to try to be appointed to the HOA and the only ones who care enough to want to be in a cycle of continual judgement over their neighbors.

Why? It’s likely that they’ve never had real power in life, so seeing the next door neighbor paint his house an unapproved shade of tan gives them the shiver of pleasure in anticipating the pain that they’ll cause their neighbor. But they’ll wait until he finishes, first.

Is it easy becoming a Grundy? Sure. Heck, I was taking a walk in the city where I work (Modern Mount Pilot) and almost Grundifyed myself. I was taking a walk during my lunch break, and saw a guy in an SUV pull up to a dumpster at a baseball field. He popped his trunk and began dumping his garbage into the dumpster.

I had a moment where I managed a bit of indignant outrage, but then realized: it wasn’t my city, it wasn’t my ballfield, and for all I knew the city was fine with what he was doing. He certainly wasn’t dumping his trash all over his front yard or in the road. I calmed myself, but I could easily see how one gives in to the Grundy side.

I’ll give in to the Mrs. Grundy side when my badge shows up in the mail.

Mrs. Grundy has been such a feature of culture that she’s a fixture of Western culture. C.S. Lewis, Aldous Huxley, Dickens, Barnum, Chesterton, Joyce, Heinlein, Jack London, and even P.G. Wodehouse have all referenced her in their writing. And now her crowning achievement of recognition: I mentioned her.

Whereas the Karen just wants the world to fit her expectations, Mrs. Grundy is far worse. Mrs. Grundy wants the world to follow the rules, which she conveniently knows better than anyone else.

Karens don’t want to wear a mask. Mrs. Grundy wants to see you executed for not having one, preferably after the torture of, say, having to listen to Miley Cyrus describe quantum physics. Thankfully, Mrs. Grundy, however is only dangerous if you live in that small circle of control where she can stamp her puny feet and shake her wrinkled fists in rage. Which is normally within 200 feet (37°C) from where she is at any given time.

But then there’s the last one: The AWFL. AWFL stands for Affluent White Female Liberals. And if Karen is annoying and self-centered, and Mrs. Grundy is the would-be tyrant, the AWFL is the Queen of the Left.

It’s also how many times she had to watch the Sesame Street® episode on the letter “O” before she realized that was her middle initial.

What’s an AWFL?

She’s a 30 year old Yale graduate in Woman’s Studies who marches against white privilege hand in hand with her Harvard husband who works in investment banking while their surrogate-born child is in the care of their illegal Guatemalan nanny.
She writes letters to the congressman she knew back in prep school about the lack of government spending for poverty while wearing a $380 sweatshirt that was hand embroidered in Pakistan.
She sends her kids to a private school for a “better education” than they could get in the local integrated school, and lives in a gated neighborhood to keep out undesirables.

A prototype AWFL is the Governor of Michigan.

Yes, this really happened.

Gretchen Whitmer outlawed, based on Corona (and I’m not making up any of this):

Driving a car between two houses you own. Because COVID-19 hides in vacant houses and might slit your throat because it hides behind the door with a knife to ambush you when you come in.
The Gretch said that grocery, pot, liquor and abortion stores could stay open, but buying plants was forbidden. Because having an abortion while stoned is a right, but growing food in a garden is a privilege.
Kayaks? They’re ok, liberals like those and they allow you to buy those cute outfits like Stacey has, and you look so Motorboats? A sure sign of the viral apocalypse.
And science certainly shows that fishing and hunting is the number one way that COVID-19 is transmissible. It’s proven science according to YouTube®.

As I said, I think we we’ve hit Peak Karen. Karen is harmless, and fun to make fun of. But when I see her show up all over the place at the same time? Yeah, that meme is a month from being a Doge.

Keep Doge alive!

Mrs. Grundy? I’m on a solo quest to bring her back as a meme. Mrs. Grundy makes society worse for all of us.

But the AWFL?

The AWFL is probably the single most dangerous thing in society today, and Whitmer is the Ur-AWFL. And if you repeat “Ur-AWFL” fast enough, you can sound just like a Muppet®. But Whitmer isn’t a Muppet™. She has power. She has money. She has control. And she’s not alone. Even in a crisis, Whitmer’s ideology overwhelms actions that could actually be reasonably put in place to save lives.

And that’s AWFL.

Of the three? I’ll take Karen any day.

Healthcare, Unemployment, and Soviet Nails

“Point of interest? Offering to shoot us might not work so well as an incentive as you might imagine.” – Firefly

But that’s not as bad as the unemployed jester: he’s nobody’s fool.

As I looked at the headlines today, two of them jumped out at me. The first was this (capitalization same as the original):

82% WANT MONTHLY STIMULUS CHECKS . . . . (LINK to actual study)

As usual, there are some misleading bits behind the headline. If you clicked through the fluff pieces (several times) to the actual study on the stimulus checks that I linked to, it really says that 82% want stimulus checks as long as the government is mandating a shutdown. That’s a lot more reasonable, since it’s not asking for that money, you know, forever. Except in Michigan, where I believe governor will keep the economy in shutdown mode until scientists develop immortality.

So, the headline was misleading, and people didn’t want the money forever. That made me happy. Until I read the real story embedded in the study and saw this statistic:

74% of Republicans and 84% of Democrats agree that we should move to a universal health care system.

Stick a fork in it, folks, like a doughnut around Stacey Abrams, it’s done. If the numbers in that study are correct, regardless of how you or I might feel about it, nationalized health care in some form is now probably just a matter of details and whose name goes on the package.

At least the Washington Post can explain that unusual eclipse on the East Coast now.

I could spend a lot of time talking about how and why we got here, including discussion of how the system we have is just like Michael Moore: it incorporates the worst aspects of capitalism and the worst aspects of socialism. But I won’t. This battle, I think, is effectively lost. A shrewd candidate for president will make this a centerpiece of his campaign, and the only difference will be if the final version is called TrumpTreatment© or BidenBenefits®.

Obamacare has served the only purpose it was designed for: it is the capstone of a series of Federal mandates since the 1980s that have served to make the costs of healthcare in this country so incredibly high that literally anything is better than the status quo. Healthcare in the United States doesn’t in any way mimic a free market, except in plastic surgery and laser eye surgery. Those costs have gone down because insurance generally doesn’t pay for them and doctors have to actually compete. I guess the other nice thing about being a plastic surgeon is that they get to see new faces every week.

Healthcare should remind everyone of the mantra of the Left: “Never let a good crisis go to waste.” This crisis has been made through successive actions of the Left to make hospitals have to charge responsible people for every drug addled meth and crack head and pregnant illegal alien that drools or waddles their way into the emergency room. But there’s enough blame for everyone, since the corporatist wing of the Republican party has taken action to ensure that insulin makers can charge Americans six times the cost for a life giving drug (insulin) in the United States as compared to our neighbors to the North.

If the first headline wasn’t bad enough, the second headline was:

68% Of Unemployed ‘Eligible For Payments Greater Than Lost Earnings’ . . . . (LINK to study, and not three layers of journo-fluff)

This is one with which the extended Wilder family has some experience. Alia S. Wilder was recently working from her home composing Mongolian throat-singing mix tapes for the black market. Normally she does this in an office, but due to BatFlu, she was sent to work from home. Her boss called and told her they were temporarily shutting down the business.

The cat then told me, “Snitches get stitches.” I had no idea he was closely watching health care policy.

Since the market they serve of throat-singing aficionados was entirely shut down by Corona-chan, it was a logical business move to make. Alia S. Wilder was also one of the first people to get called back. Good? Well, yes. But she had to take an income cut to do so, since her job pays less than unemployment insurance plus the $600 a week that Uncle Sugar was kicking in.

I was proud of her that her complaint level was exactly zero: she was roaring and ready to get back to work. Those mix tapes won’t make themselves, after all. But how many people would just love to stay home and collect the WuFlu bucks? Get paid for doing nothing? It must be that “new normal” that people keep talking about.

I actually understand the reason people would like free money, and would prefer to stay home and eat nachos and smoke weed on Gram-gram’s couch rather than deliver pizzas. However, the $600 a week bump sets up bad incentives: I read one story of a guy who needed pizza delivery dudes, and no one would take the job because unemployment paid so much more. I can see that, given the horrible hiccup in the economy, why the government would want to print lots and lots of money encourage consumption, but the increased payments have essentially raised the minimum wage to somewhere between $20-$25 just to break even with current unemployment payments. How much more would you have to pay people to actually work?

For markets to work, there needs to be some sort of connection between supply and demand. If you pay people $1000 a week, how many will think that working for $1200 a week is a good idea? Not many. And I’m willing to bet that if the economy is as bad as I think it is, the Federal government will continue the payments for longer than the current end date in July. During the Great Recession, the Federal government continued unemployment insurance for 100 weeks. Two years.

What kind of distortion will that have on the labor market?

Yes, this happened on a CNN special last week.

In thinking about this story, I was reminded of an old story that I heard about the Soviet Union:

There was a Soviet nail factory. In the factory, the communist leaders from Moscow called and told the manager, “Make sure you increase production of nails! You must increase the tonnage for Comrade Stalin!”

The manager hung up the phone. “Yuri,” he called for the production foreman, “make a production schedule change. Make very, very large nails this month.”

Accordingly, the factory had a record production month in tons of nails produced. The communist leaders printed a picture of the factory manager receiving an award. But soon enough, the leaders in Moscow realized that not a lot of people needed nails that weighed two pounds each. The communist leader called the manager back. “The tonnage was good. But this month, make more nails for Comrade Stalin.”

The manager hung up the phone. “Yuri,” he called for the production foreman, “make a production schedule change. Make many very, very, small nails this month.”

Not my translation. The KGB spy school told me to pretend I don’t speak fluent Russian.

I wasn’t able to verify the basics of this story, but I did find the accompanying cartoon which at least hints that the Soviets themselves were aware that something was broken in their system. And I did find a story about a Soviet plant that made a machine to help make tires. They developed new technology that allowed the machine to make tires much faster, but refused to make it.

Why?

Then they would make fewer machines. In a market-based economy the company would celebrate their new, better machine and use it as a selling point to beat their competition. But in this case, the incentives were to make more machines rather than make better machines.

This is the primary failure mechanism of socialist systems. They have bad incentives. I read once that in Great Britain that people ring up the ambulance to take them to the doctor. Why not? It’s “free,” right?

Once a “free” system takes hold, however, it will never leave until the economy collapses under all the “free” money and “free” services. Why? People become dependent on free things. If you want to make someone dependent on you? Give them things. Proof?

Ever hear your parents say, “My house, my rules?” Giving is a form of control.

I think the last person I saw driving this windowless van was named Bernie.

Freedom comes from saying “no” to free things, but I have the sense that people are going to be saying yes to free stuff.

Always think back to what Admiral Ackbar says at a time like this:

The Leftist War on Culture: Comedy Edition

â€œIÂ wokeÂ up on the floor of some Japanese family’s rec room, and they would not stop screaming.â€ – Anchorman

I hear William Shatner hates one pie:Â Pe-Khaaaaaaan.

I like movies.Â And I like television.Â Up until recently, I used to read a lot of fiction books; now I read a lot more non-fiction.Â Together, along with the news we read and the Internet sites we visit, this defines the core of our mythology, our legends, and our shared experiences outside of religion.

When The Mrs. watches movies she likes to watch them for characters â€“ how people react and change based on the circumstances that they encounter.Â That seems to fascinate her, probably because The Mrs. is a human.Â Me?Â I like to watch movies for new ideas and new information.Â Billions of people have fallen in love, but how many have thought of a new idea?Â Ideas catch my interest, which might explain The Mrs.â€™ cute nickname for me:Â Soulless Human-Looking Robot.

But movies today, frankly, suck.Â Theyâ€™re awful.Â Not all of them, mind you, but a big majority.Â Seeing a good one is rare enough today that it actually surprises me when I see one that I like.Â For the most part, what passes for a â€œgoodâ€ movie is just one that doesnâ€™t actively disappoint me.Â The Mrs. rarely goes to movies, and even before Coronavirus made NetflixÂ® the king of media, she just stopped going to movies in about 2014 or 2015.

I had to stop talking to a friend who said that NetflixÂ® was the cheapest streaming service.Â I just canâ€™t be around a Huluâ„¢-cost denier.

About that time was another event:Â the functional disappearance of an entire movie genre: Â the comedy.Â What happened to comedy?Â Since the year 2000, there have been a total of 45 comedy movies that have grossed over $100 million (in adjusted 2000 dollars) at the box office.Â The last comedy to hit this threshold was in 2015.Â So, the numbers prove it â€“ comedy is currently deader than a Clinton opponent.

The strange reason that this is happening is that comedy movies just arenâ€™t funny anymore.Â Itâ€™s not that Iâ€™ve lost my sense of humor:Â objectively the movies arenâ€™t funny.Â Audiences have largely abandoned them.Â America clearly has an appetite for humor, there were 45 comedy films that that made over $100 million between 2000 and 2015, but the numbers keep dropping over time:Â comedy movies used to take in about 20% of the box office.Â In 2019, comedy was down to 6.6% of the market.

So, why are comedies not funny anymore?Â The audiences havenâ€™t changed:Â teenage boys are still teenage boys.Â So, it must be the movies.

When you look at the movies, theyâ€™ve gone from broad comedies that focus on making people laugh to either comedies that are created to push a particular viewpoint or comedies that depend on getting humor from extremely explicit sexual content.Â Certainly, there are good sexy jokes â€“ remember youâ€™re reading a post from the person who invented bikini economics graphs.Â But, like anything, thereâ€™s a line.Â And Iâ€™m not alone in being happy that Zack and Miri Make a Porno could have just as easily been titled Zack and Miri Make No Money since it did so poorly at the box office.

Another reason is that comedy is dangerous to the Left.Â To paraphrase a J. Michael Straczynski and Neil Gaiman Babylon 5 script, â€œComedians say serious things and get a laugh, politicians say silly things and people take them seriously.â€ Â Â At some level, great comedy is about telling a truth, but an uncomfortable truth.Â Thatâ€™s the reason that Stalin didnâ€™t allow real humor in the Soviet Union.Â Itâ€™s the same reason that Jerry SeinfFeld said he wonâ€™t do comedy shows at colleges â€“ the woke crowd wants to hear humor, but only the jokes they find politically acceptable, regardless of the truth.

Obligatory Stalin Joke:Â One day Stalin decides to go to the cinema in disguise and hear what people are really saying about him.Â When the newsreel comes on the audience stands up and applauds each time he appears on the screen. Stalin is pleased. Modestly, he himself remains seated. After a few moments the man next to him leans over and whispers:Â â€œMost people feel the same way you do Comrade, but youâ€™ll be safer if you stand up.â€

Sadly, the failure of comedies seems to apply to movies as a whole now â€“ the movie industry growth has been stagnant since 2012 or so.Â I think itâ€™s tied back to the same reason, Leftists feeling that movies should be explicit carriers of Leftist politics.Â Movies can have a point, but they have to have the politically correct point.Â They can be poignant or uplifting, but only in a Leftist-approved way that involves someone saying, â€œBut Iâ€™m a lesbianâ€ during the movie, though most of the time the other patrons tell me to shut up.Â Movies are crafted so they donâ€™t allow the audience to come to conclusions outside of those approved by Hollywood and the globalist Left.

And itâ€™s been getting worse.Â By most measures, the last three Star WarsÂ® films have been the worst of the franchise.Â Sure, The Force AwakensÂ® got big box office numbers, but that was primarily because people were so excited to see a new Star Warsâ„¢ film that they would have spent money to go see ChewbaccaÂ® having lice combed out of his hair for three hours.

There was a movie about ChewbaccaÂ® making vases out of porcelain.Â It was called Hairy Potter.

But Star WarsÂ® became something different after DisneyÂ© bought it.Â It became woke.Â The main character was a girl.Â Iâ€™m okay with that.Â But in this case, the girl had powers far in excess of, well, anyone.Â After merely touching a lightsaberÂ® and never having trained with it, she defeated a man who had trained with one for years.

Yeah.Â I would rather have watched the Wookieâ„¢ be de-loused.

To cap off The Force Awakens, a thoroughly uncharismatic group of characters with no chemistry defeated yet another Death Starâ„¢ in a way that was so memorable I canâ€™t recall it.Â Heck they might have unplugged it for all I remember, but I certainly do know that Luke SkywalkerÂ® didnâ€™t drop a torpedo into a reactor exhaust. Â Â When I left the theater after The Force Awakens, I was done with Star WarsÂ®.Â For good.Â What had generally been a dependably fun series of movies was gone.

But having a series of movies is now the norm.Â Movies had become a batch of either remakes of old movies or movies in a franchise.Â Since 2000, 119 movies (at least) have been released as part of a franchise.Â 23 of those are MarvelÂ® franchise movies.Â And, Iâ€™ll admit that in many instances those franchise movies have been entertaining.Â But after 23 movies, I think weâ€™ve reached Peak Marvelâ„¢, since theyâ€™re quickly becoming woke, too.Â The final straw for many will probably be Thor, who is reportedly going to be replaced by a woman, and IronmanÂ®, who will be replaced by Nic Cage in a suit he made out of old Coors Lightâ„¢ cans.

Understand â€“ itâ€™s not enough to create a new character, the Left wants to destroy existing characters by replacing them utterly:Â 2016â€™s Ghostbusters is another example.Â I think these changes are because Hollywood simply cannot help itself.Â For the longest time they were content to make money while slowly changing culture to the Left.Â Now?Â The message that seems to be seeping in is that there is a need to pay for the sins of humanity even if it costs the studio money.Â Who should pay for those sins?Â Well, not the filmmakers.Â Really, itâ€™s just the people they donâ€™t like.

Donâ€™t forget, celebrities are just like us!

And why?Â There has been a push to replace the dominant culture in the United States.Â That includes replacing old taboos with new ones that reflect the new culture the Left is seeking.Â The main idea is that you can do anything and there should be no repercussions.Â This especially includes sex, where the purely physical has been raised to the level of the sacred and there is no whim that shouldnâ€™t be not only tolerated, but celebrated.Â This also includes career choices, where every Grievance Studies graduate with no discernible skills should be given a living wage, complete health care, and the respect that they feel that they deserve, paid for by you and me.

This is really an infantilizing of the culture:Â itâ€™s the promotion of the idea that whatever urge you have should be indulged.Â The Mrs. described it as a culture of spoiled children with daddy issues:Â the fault is with their boss.Â Or their boyfriend/girlfriend.Â Or their parents.Â Or society.Â Itâ€™s never their fault.

In this instance, itâ€™s easier to blame a Civil War general or a Founding Father than to blame themselves for their condition.Â The result?Â Pull down a statue, and complain about Thomas Jefferson.

I was named after Thomas Jefferson.Â He was named a very long time ago, so you were probably named after he was, too.

This spirit has even invaded books.Â I used to pick up a science fiction book at random in the book store and feel that there was a good chance that Iâ€™d be exposed to new ideas and have fun in the process.Â More recently, a lot of the books have become a slog.Â I wondered if it was me.Â I then picked up some stories written a few decades ago, and was pleased.Â It wasnâ€™t me.Â Those old stories had more ideas and fun in a typical paragraph than most novels do today.Â Today, the novels seem all about preaching and explaining how awful people are.Â Back then, even though we faced a daily threat of nuclear annihilation, those stories were more positive about mankind and our future than the ones I see today.

We are in the midst of a concerted effort by the Left to destroy the culture we live in and the values it stands for.Â Old writers, old statesmen, and old heroes are all being viewed through the lens of the new culture and the new values in an effort to destroy them for sins they never committed.Â The Left understands the stakes: Â until they destroy the old culture and values, they will be judged by the old standards.

And they know they will be found wanting.Â Especially their comedy movies.

Those are just awful.

Stalingrad, Democide, and Maybe The Government Isn’t Here To Help You?

“What does a Nietzschean mother hope for her son when she names him Genghis Stalin?” – Andromeda

Actual Joke From the USSR (via Wikipedia©): Stalin reads his report to the Party Congress. Suddenly someone sneezes. “Who sneezed?” Silence. “First row! On your feet! Shoot them!” They are shot, and he asks again, “Who sneezed, Comrades?” No answer. “Second row! On your feet! Shoot them!” They are shot too. “Well, who sneezed?” At last a sobbing cry resounds in the Congress Hall, “It was me! Me!” Stalin says, “Bless you, Comrade!” and resumes his speech.

In August of 1942, the civilian inhabitants of Stalingrad probably totaled about a million people. That number included the normal residents, but also a huge influx of Soviet refugees caused by the Axis push through the Ukraine. However, the German Army Group: South was on the attack, and had been pushing toward Stalingrad for weeks.

According to Google Maps™ at the end of July, 1942, Stalingrad was less than a nine hour stroll from the German position. I assume that includes a lunch and bathroom break and maybe a juice box at halftime, but you never can tell since those Germans were sticklers for keeping to the schedule. Besides, I’m not sure that the Germans had good cell reception at that point, so they might have had to ask for directions.

Stalin decided that the Soviet soldiers would fight best if they had their backs to a city filled with innocent civilians, so he had absolutely forbidden any evacuation of Stalingrad. At least, any evacuation of people. The Soviets did take the time to get the grain, cattle, and railway cars out of Stalingrad. At least Stalin had his priorities straight, right? I mean, railway cars don’t eat and don’t complain.

Popular German Joke During Stalingrad: Our troops have captured a two-room apartment with kitchen, toilet and bathroom, and managed to hold two-thirds of the apartment, despite heavy enemy counterattack.

Not evacuating the inhabitants of Stalingrad was entirely consistent with Stalin’s fun loving and carefree personality. Stalin insisted that his own firstborn son become a Soviet artillery officer. When Stalin’s boy was captured by the Germans in the first few days after Operation Barbarossa kicked off and then rolled over Soviet troops like the media over inconvenient stories about Joe Biden, Stalin was upset.

Why?

Stalin was upset that his son hadn’t killed himself rather than be captured. So, yeah, Stalin wasn’t exactly a sentimental guy, but at least he was consistent. And he was consistent throughout decades. Between 1917 and 1987, the Soviet Union was responsible for (roughly) 62 million deaths of their own people. All but 6 million of those deaths occurred while Stalin was in some position of high leadership.

I guess you can’t make an omelet without breaking a few Kulaks, right? (Stalin’s Cannibal Island and Distracted Driving)

Sadly, Stalin’s line of Stalin-themed lingerie was less than successful, probably because it was made of unwashed wool and aluminum shavings.

I think I first understood the joke, “I’m from the government, and I’m here to help you,” when I was about 10 years old. It displays a pretty simple sentiment that was common in the rural area where I grew up: government wasn’t the solution to our problems, government was the problem. Reagan used both of those phrases during his campaign and inaugural address, but he could have been speaking for most of the farmers who had coffee in the local café.

Now, sure, those farmers were fine taking the government’s money, but what they didn’t like was when government told them what to do. From the farmers’ perspective, government was out of control even back in Reagan’s 1980. Those farmers had grown up in a different world: when they were young, say 12, they could have saved up enough money from their paper route or whatever Pa paid them to milk the cows, and marched down to the local hardware store and purchased a .22 rifle of their very own along with a box of ammo to go shooting with their friends.

Not at their friends, with their friends. City folks in the current year still can’t seem to figure that one out.

I tried to look up “ATF jokes” on Google®, but all Google™ would do was show me pictures of the ATF agents who planned the Waco operation.

The dads of those kids could go into the hardware store and purchase dynamite, without a license or even a reason. Want to build a dam on your own property? Go for it, though the states might have a rule or two if they ever caught you, which they probably wouldn’t. Want to build a combination strip club and church on your own land? It’s a free country, ain’t no one stopping you. Endangered species? Well, there was probably a reason for that – if it were tough enough or not so darn tasty, they would be fine.

In 1952, there were roughly 20,000 pages of Federal regulations in the “Code of Federal Regulations” – the big book that has all of the rules. In 2020? There are roughly 180,000 pages. Of rules. That’s (using my estimates) nearly two words of regulation for every person in the United States. My two are promulgate and trout. And you can go to jail for violating many of the regulations on those 180,000 pages. Why do we need 160,000 more pages of regulations than in 1950?

Control.

How are you supposed to keep track of that many rules? I’ve heard that “ignorance of the law is no excuse,” so I’m thinking that the people in America must be psychic, because there’s no way that any single person could know what they’re either:

required to do or
prohibited from doing or
free to do.

It’s actually the preferred end state of government: everything is either prohibited or mandatory, and thus you can selectively prosecute anyone for anything at any time. Everyone is guilty, and like Stalin’s buddy and head of the secret police, Lavrentiy Pavlovich Beria, said: “Show me the man and I’ll show you the crime.” Everyone’s guilty – it’s just a matter of picking the person you want to prosecute.

But one man at a time? That’s how amateurs operate.

Government regulations: keeping you safe from trucks that might be slightly taller than a number written in a book by a regulator who has never seen a truck.

When I spent time last year researching the causes of death between 1900 and 2000 (In the World Murder Olympics, Communists Take Gold and Silver!), one statistic popped out: 262 million people were killed by their own government. That’s more that every murder in the twentieth century, and more than every person killed in every war during that same period. More people were killed by their own government than were killed in every natural disaster during that century. It’s almost governments could use a warning label. Oh, wait, government regulations are what mandate the warning labels.

I’d post this warning, but the font is probably not legally the right size.

Thankfully, the decline in deaths caused by government decreased when communism ceased to be an active ideology. The end of the Soviet empire was one event, and the death of Mao and the adoption of a capitalist incentives in a still authoritarian China was another that made the citizens of the world their own nations safer.

But what led to those ideologies taking over in the first place? Generally, four things.

An Economic Crisis
A Governmental Power Vacuum
A Civil War
The Idea That Equality of Outcome Is More Important Than Equality of Opportunity

It’s ironic that the two countries both at the forefront of killing their own citizens advertised themselves as the most equal in human history, but not surprising. Stalin and Mao did their part to create an equal society – one where anyone could be killed at any time for any reason. They were also the reason a word was invented: Democide.

Well, they all look equal to me.

Democide means, in a really short definition, your government deciding you’re wasting too much of your country’s valuable oxygen. It doesn’t matter why. It’s that your government decides that’ it’s not them, it’s you. It doesn’t mean the Russians killing German soldiers. It doesn’t include the Germans bombing the Russians, soldiers or not. It includes the Russians killing Russian civilians. It also includes the Russians killing German civilians after they take over the places where the Germans were living, and vice-versa. So, Stalin didn’t kill only Russians, but that was who he was most fond of killing. And Mao? Mao pretty much exclusively killed Chinese during his bouts of democide, perhaps because take-out had yet to be invented.

If you want to look more into it, here’s a website devoted to it (LINK). It has the look of a Geocities website circa 1996, and some of the links that the site points to have been Clintoned: abandoned like Bill’s ex-girlfriends and eliminated like Hillary’s enemies. The site, however does lays out the numbers of dead for governments that decide that there are just too damn many of their own people hanging around. Did I say hanging? Sorry, poor choice of words.

Reprinted with permission.

Stalingrad’s number of civilians dead “officially” was 40,000. But it’s thought that 40,000 died just on the first day of German bombing back in August of 1942. A more credible estimate is that up to half a million civilians died during the six month battle. These citizens aren’t even listed in Stalin’s total above – these are “just” war dead, and not attributed to the Soviets.

Whew. I bet Stalin would be pretty embarrassed if it took the Soviet total up to 62.5 million instead of just 62 million.

Why do I bring this up now? Hmm. No reason.

None at all.