âAnd he wasn’t alone. He had close to a thousand followers when he died. They conducted rituals up on the roof, bizarre rituals intended to bring about the end of the world. And now it looks like it may actually happen.â â Ghostbusters
I guess that makes my wife Mrs. Doubtpfizer.
Disclaimer: Humor writer, not a doctor. But Iâm a humor writer that likes to look at the worst-case scenarios because someone has to know that âIâm sorryâ and âI apologizeâ donât always mean the same thing, especially at a funeral.
One of the more disturbing things about the trajectory of the panic-response-panic model that weâve seen in the last year about the âRona has been the nearly complete abandonment of the idea of impartial science. Oh, sure, we knew that scientists could be bought, and in most cases, theyâre cheaper than congressmen. Scientists can be bought for a shrimp cocktail. To buy a congressman, you have to spring for the bacon-wrapped shrimp.
When you look at the data from only eight months ago, the University of Pennsylvania, actual scientists that were presumably not under the influence of shrimp came to this conclusion (LINK):
Pay attention to the phrase, âNo large trials of any (emphasis added) mRNA vaccine have been completed yet.â
Any.
This is a first attempt at ever using this technology, and the decision was made that, âHey, sounds good, letâs do it. What could go wrong?â
This sounds suspiciously like the reasoning I used with my first marriage, so, on its face, this is the same logic used by amorous 20-year-olds. I wonder: were they playing beer pong when they made the decision?
So, what could go wrong?
Iâll start with the least scary and move to the scariest ones. To be fair, the least scary are the impacts that are the most likely, and in some cases, they are certainly happy. Data, however, is murky. Congress voted to keep the report on the origin of the virus classified, so Iâm not holding my breath that any information counter to the official narrative will be seeing daylight anytime soon.
Heart Attacks In Healthy Young People â As far as I can tell, this is 100% confirmed. How often is it happening? Difficult to say. This is, however, often enough that I think it is clear that with the death rate from COVID for young, healthy people is lower than the risk that they have of driving to school.
How low?
If you have been documented to have COVID, the death rate is in the range of 1 out of 100,000. Since itâs my theory that between one-half and two-thirds of âRona infections in kids arenât ever officially reported, that rate is probably closer to (conservatively) 1 out of 300,000. Translation: rub some dirt on it, youâre fine.
How frequent are the heart attacks induced by the jab? Donât know. And with data and reporting being what they are today, we might not know for a decade, if ever.
Thatâs okay. No pharmaceutical company has any liability, so you donât have to worry about the CEO losing his bonus.
I hear that Mountain Dew® is coming out with a new flavor for heart attack victims: Code Blue®.
You know itâs going to be a grim list when Widespread Sterility is the second-best case scenario. This one is still speculative, and thereâs evidence for it. Iâm stunned, really, that pregnant women were encouraged to get the âjabâ, because when The Mrs. was preggers I was pretty sure the doctor wasnât convinced that eating one Cheeto® a month was safe for pregnant women.
But here we are. I havenât heard of a lack of babies being born, though Iâve heard of more than one post-jab miscarriage. Again I ask the question: why would young, healthy people be taking this, especially after (again, anecdotal) evidence that the spike protein seems to concentrate in the reproductive bits?
Breakthrough and Jabbed Becoming Superspreading Virus Factories is happening right now. This one is, of course, the most ironic. It does (again, at least anecdotally) appear that the death rate due to the âRona is somewhat lower if the person is jabbed. But if it doesnât stop a person from getting or spreading âRona, all it does is act as a treatment against future cases? Again, the only trial data weâll ever get from Pfizer⢠stated that 14 people with the control died, and 15 people with the Pfizer© science juice died.
Because thatâs how you know itâs working.
But apparently I need to get jabbed so the jabbed wonât get the âRona from me even though they can get âRona and are much better at spreading it because they show fewer symptoms? This ranks higher because, more superspreaders? More mutations.
Clotting/COVID Spike Protein Runaway is a scenario that has been seen, well, at least the clotting part. Thereâs a reason they called the Johnson & Johnson⢠jab the #clotshot. According to one panel of doctors (it was on YouTube®, so take it with however many grains of salt youâd like), the spike protein is the problem. Originally it was the solution, because thatâs what the mRNA shot did: make a personâs cells produce the spike protein so that the immune system could recognize it.
This doctorâs theory was the protein wanders down through the bloodstream where it damages the blood vessel walls in the capillaries, the smallest section. This causes clotting, and I donât think it is disputed that this caused several deaths and several amputations because of the clots as directly caused by the jab.
This doctor went further, however. He maintained this clotting would spread since there seems to be ample continual production of the spike protein. His prognosis? Everyone who had the spike protein-inducing shot would die of heart failure in two or three years due to cumulative damage. Everyone who took the shot.
I rate this one as pretty bad â civilization-ending, in fact if there are billions of corpses to deal with in two years. But I also rank this as pretty unlikely.
I hope.
As bad as all of that is, there are three more horror stories waiting. Lucky you!
I donât think COVID was made in China â weâve had it 18 months and itâs still working.
The next is Antibody Dependent Enhancement (ADE). The short version is that in this situation (which really happens, though rarely) the candidate vaccine appears to create antibodies that would protect against the disease. Good news!
But not really. In this case, the antibodies actually make it easier for the virus to get into the cell. So, if when you get the virus you were inoculated against in the first place, it will kill you. Yup. In this case, the virus actually makes the disease deadlier. Iâm hoping that this wave of the âRona run isnât ADE showing up.
I donât think that it is, or I think we would have seen a very significant death wave among the jabbed, one so big it would be difficult to hide.
Marekâs Disease is the next case. A âleakyâ vaccine was created for chickens to vaccinate them against Marekâs Disease, which totally sounds like it was named after a Star Trek® character. The chickens could catch the disease, and the vaccine was just good enough to keep them from dying from it.
Good news, right? Well, no. Because the vaccine allowed them to be super-spreaders. The virus kept mutating until it was absolutely fatal to chickens. Now, most chickens have it, and spread it. Unless a baby chick (thatâs around other chickens) is vaccinated, it will die. Chickens as we know them are dependent upon having this vaccine.
If the âjabsâ we have against COVID are similar, we might see exactly what weâre seeing now: people who were jabbed having the virus and incubating it and spreading it and making it more and more dangerous. Under the worst-case scenario, the virus would mutate into a universally lethal form, and weâd all have to take some future version of the jab.
Or die. As a species.
That would be a big oops. Again, unlikely, but it does meet the patterns weâve been seeing. But the worst case is the next one.
To get to the other . . . oh, wait . . .
The Spike is a Prion prions are misfolded proteins. A perfect example of this is mad cow disease: a misfolded protein makes it into the brain and causes a chain reaction with other brain proteins. Eventually, when a person catches mad cow disease, a human brain becomes spongier than Joe Bidenâs.
The scary part about prions is, even though they arenât alive, they can spread and replicate in the body like they are alive. So, in this case, the spike protein would eventually cause some horrible jab-zombie end to mankind.
Thankfully, the prion theory looks to be the silliest and least likely scenario. But all of these scenarios, however, are showing up because the information is so very, very bad. I included the clip from the University of Pennsylvania study because it is honest. It shows what we know, and what we donât know. There isnât the lingering smell of corruption and shrimp anywhere in the document.
I got kicked out of the zoo for feeding the ducks . . . to the crocodiles. Those crocodiles sure will miss me.
With any luck we wonât see horrible health consequences from the jab. The biggest casualties right now appear to be any lingering trust we had in Big Science, our economy, the concept of private property, any restraint on government edicts whatsoever, and the illusion that we had freedom to begin with.
But, remember â to buy a congressman you need bacon-wrapped shrimp. I mean, they can be bought, but they donât want you to think theyâre cheap.