“It’s not the money I’ll miss. It’s just all the stuff.” – The Jerk
What’s the difference between my dog and Amber Heard? My dog has never made a mess on a bed.
Most of the time when people think about being happy, it’s about things that they want to add to their lives. They want to get a new car. To buy a new house. To get a new iPhone®.
That list is mainly about things: stuff. It’s not surprising. $285 billion was spent on advertising in the United States in 2021 (this sounds high to me, but I found it in two different sources). Digital ads alone were over $150 billion of that. And every one of those ad dollars was spent for one reason – to make the person who saw the ad unhappy.
Advertising, to work, has to create enough discontent to make someone pull a wallet out and make a purchase. “Oh, that looks like a great PEZ® dispenser! I’m sad I don’t have it.” And, yet, when I finally get that limited edition Sturmgeschütz (StuG) 40 Ausf. F/8 PEZ® dispenser, I can finally be really happy. Hey, I didn’t choose the StuG life, the StuG life chose me.
Would the StuG have looked better wearing a tank top?
The reality is, though, that it would briefly bring me some joy, and then I’d put it with my Founding Fathers PEZ© dispenser collection that The Mrs. got me for Christmas in 2012, and notice it from time to time. So, in one sense, (some) things that initially bring us joy also just end up cluttering our lives. Oh, I wear my grandfather’s ring daily, but how much do I need to have that Helix® concert t-shirt from 1994?
The purpose of advertising is to make the hollowest promise of all: money for joy. Sure, if I had the choice I’d rather be rich and unhappy than poor and unhappy, because the food is so much better. But unhappy is still unhappy.
Who steals from rich college students to give to poor college students? Ramen Hood.
So, the advertising and “stuff” is a problem. Since I haven’t watched commercial TV in almost three years, most ads I get are fairly poorly targeted online and spur very little discontent, since half the time I’m not even sure what the ad is for anymore. It seems like the current standard for naming companies is to take a noun or verb, mangle it, and add something silly at the end. So when I see an ad for Vomitorius® I have no idea if that’s a food delivery service or a shoe designed specifically for left-handed hermaphrodites.
So, I’m happier here not by addition, but by subtraction. It’s hard to be brought into a state of discontent by ads I never see. Or don’t understand.
What else is making people unhappy?
Another thing that’s driving us nuts is what we’re being sold in popular culture. Popular culture right now seems to be based on some sort of variation on a single, simple theme: if it feels good, do it. And it seems to be getting worse, especially in the last ten or so years.
I got surprised at work by an inspection of the leafy vegetables in the produce department. No one expects the spinach inquisition.
If it feels good, do it is, of course, is a just a version of what Aleister Crowley (a candidate for most unpleasant man, ever) said, “Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law.” And Crowley appeared to love the darkest sides of humanity. Heck, Crowley was a person that makes Hillary Clinton look like an amateur when it comes to the evil department.
This philosophy has been the driving force in culture for decades because it’s an easy sale – unlimited pleasure: all you have to do is ignore your values. This idea is implanted deep into the media: songs, movies, television, and even the news. Most of the time we don’t notice it for the same reason a fish doesn’t notice water – it’s all around us.
All of the behaviors that come from Crowley’s statement have had a horrible impact. It turns man from a person that reasons, delays gratification, and looks to a set of enduring values into a creature that is driven by the pleasures of the moment, no matter what form they may take or what consequences that might mean. So, I guess that brings Bill Clinton into the equation, too.
What do you get if you cross Bill Clinton and Hillary Clinton? Found in your cell, unresponsive.
Though it might seem like doing whatever we want whenever we want should make people happy, the result is almost always the opposite. True happiness, deep happiness comes from the opposite of the pleasures of the moment.
I’ll give an example: kids.
Kids are awful. They start out as useless blobs of flesh that smell bad. They take too much time. And then it gets worse. The time and emotional investment I have in just my son Pugsley alone has probably cost years of my life. I know it has cost tens of thousands of dollars in food alone, and that was just this week.
And I wouldn’t change any of it, especially now since he’s dropped out of the “being a total tool” phase. Raising kids has been the biggest battle of my life, and has also provided me the biggest rewards and the most happiness.
There is a new workout – you knock on every door in the neighborhood and talk to each neighbor. It’s called, “Jehovah’s Fitness”.
The things that are worthwhile, the things that provide the greatest joy aren’t easy, and you can’t buy them at Amazon®. The important things are difficult. The important things require discipline. The important things don’t happen all at once.
And, generally, the most important things can’t be taken away from you. And no one will remember you for your iPhone©, or your house, or a car.
Well, unless it was a really nice car or house.
Thank you for taking the time to teach a timeless lesson; no matter how many times I hear it, I need to hear it again. I keep finding myself a Mark 4:19 and I want to be a Mark 4:20 person.
Anon, excellent, excellent reference. And yet again, it was said better than I could ever do it 2,000 years ago.
Thanks John for another reminder of the important things in life. I feel like I keep needing to relearn this lesson – I really want to be a Mark 4:20 type person but keep finding myself back in 4:19 (parable of the sower).
Tony, excellent, excellent reference. And yet again, it was said better than I could ever do it 2,000 years ago.
It seems like I’ve been here before . . . 🙂
I’m in Seattle visiting my weekly phoned but rarely seen in person son (sadly taken cross country decades ago by his now estranged mom he no longer sees or talks to at all) and introducing myself to toddler and infant grandkids. Been camping out mornings at a local pancake diner to read the Seattle Times and get the lay of the land. Im a great believer that travle is the best education…
What a beautiful broken paradise this place is! How the Times can publish such endless cognitive dissonance is beyond me. Across the street is a ridiculously priced Safeway grocery store with homeless strategically camped out to panhandle at the exits under the watchful eye of a gizmo I’ve never seen before – a large solar powered trailer with a 20 foot mast housing a cluster of cameras and flashing blue lights to deter(?) them from breaking into the shopper’s cars. According to the Times a third of the cops have quit and according to the store employees there are multiple break ins daily despite Big Brother. The only thing that’s free is the glossy 64 page cannabis ad magazine at the doors.
Money for joy is definitely not working here.
D’oh, I’ve spread misinformation. There’s 80 pages per issue, not 64.
https://issuu.com/nwleaf/docs/northwestleaf_july2022
That’s just the PacificNorthwest edition. They produce five other editions for other parts of the country, all free ad mags promising joy for money.
https://leafmagazines.com/magazines
“read the Seattle Times… [travel] is the best education…” Having briefly subscribed to the Seattle Times at one point in my life, I’d sooner describe that as “travail” than “travel”.
Sounds like paradise. For who? I have no idea.
Minor (yet common) mistake: the STUG III was a German artillery system, not a tank. That is like calling Patton an “armor officer”. He was Cavalry, but the actual (non-general) tank officers were all infantry branch in WWII (armored cars were from the Cavalry, however).
Oh, I never called it a tank – I asked if it would have looked better with a tank-top! See, I was sneaky!
You are spot on Mr. Wilder. Truly the only things that make a man happy are his family and a firm belief in GOD. These things calibrate a mans moral compass to always point in the right direction. To stand tall in the face of adversity and do the right thing even flying in the face of the law. An honest and moral man doesn’t need laws to guide him to whats right. He knows in his gut what the right path is. That path may very well be a rough road and require much faith, courage and fortitude to go forward regardless of the ugliness that will be required. There are (is) no amount of Rolex watches, mansions, money or fancy cars that will ever calibrate your moral compass to guide you to do the right thing. Each man must step back and look to see where his moral compass is now pointing and judge for your self.
I was thinking about the objects that meant something to me – when I pass, most of them will probably be discarded, because the meaning exists only for me. But that’s okay – it won’t be my stuff anymore.
Q: Who won the 1944 Tour de France?
A: George S. Patton Jr.
Exactly! And if Ike would have let him close that gap, he would have won the 1944 Tour de Berlin.
“And no one will remember you for your iPhone©, or your house, or a car.
Unless it was a really nice car or house.”
JW: The Hearst family is holding for you on Line 1, the Winchester Mystery House Foundation is on Line 2, and Bruce Wayne is calling from stately Wayne Manor on Line 3. He said it was something about his car, not his house.
The best things in life are free, but that’s because the best things in life aren’t things.
And anyone who tells you money can’t buy happiness doesn’t know where to shop.
Well, those are really nice houses. And a really cool car.
I think it was David Lee Roth that said, “Money can’t buy happiness but it can buy a huge yacht that sails right next to it.”
BTW the StuG is a Late Ausf G, not an F/8. 😉
I’d add that experiences such as in nature are fulfilling for a similar reason. Tracking down the buck you are hunting or starting a fire in a rainstorm is hard work… but that’s what makes the reward so great.