Bikini Economics, Guns, and the Problem with Free Stuff

“Good job, isn’t it? Type something will ya, we’re paying for this stuff.” – Ghostbusters

I like guns.  And butter.  Especially cocoa butter.  Admit it – you’ve never enjoyed economics more.

Economics means choices.

One choice presented by Marxist economics professors to hung-over sophomores in college is between “guns or butter.”  This is a classic economic model.  In it, a choice is presented:  produce guns for defense, or food for the people, or another shot of Jägermeister© before Calc 201.  I added the Jägermeister® for the sophomores.  No one should have to learn 3-space vector calculus sober.

The idea is that there is some balance where government can feed people just enough so that they can make guns for beautiful Marxist bikini soldiers to take over the world with love and kindness and AK-47s.  In this fable, once the world chooses peace (that means Marxism), guns will no longer be produced and the glorious workers will now luxuriate in a worker’s paradise.

These are the deep thoughts of a dimwitted socialist like Kamala Harris, or of an overly caring 11 year-old who is earnestly trying to solve the world’s problems.  But I repeat myself.

Don’t be mean to Kamala.  She already enough difficulty explaining to her husband why she’s in the top results for “slept her way to the top” on a Google® image search (this is true).

Just because Marxists were wrong about economics doesn’t mean that economies that there aren’t economic choices to make.  There are.  The biggest actual economic choice to make is whether to spend the output of that economy on building additional productive capacity or on Free Stuff.

Building additional production is investment in the economy.  Sure, Leftists like to use “investment” as just another word for Free Stuff, but investment, by definition, produces a return.  In the case of investment in an economy, after the investment is done the economy produces more than it did before.  Instead of dividing a finite economic pie between guns or butter, the genius of investment is that it creates a bigger pie for everyone.  By definition, that’s a win, because it also means more guns for everyone!

There is a time to tell the truth, and a time to lie.  If she’s holding an AK, it’s time to lie.

This was self-evident in Western Civilization during the Cold War.  We picked the strategy that we invest in our economies so that they became larger, and we’d defeat Communism by out producing them.  In order to do that, we increased freedom of the free market so that instead of handfuls of production bureaucrats and commissars guessing what should be produced, millions of free people experimenting in an open economy would make that choice.  The winners were selected by the market, and even when things like the Hula-Hoop® or Justin Bieber became wildly popular, industrial capacity was increased all across Western Civilization (and Japan, which had largely adopted all of the winning parts of Western Civilization).

I would try to Hula Hoop©, but last time the neighbor called an ambulance because they thought I was having a seizure.

We allowed this to guide our military spending, too.  Multiple companies competed to produce new jet fighters that were more capable, missiles that were more accurate.  The technical prowess of the military came not from a top-down dictate, but from the companies competing to produce better defense products.  Sure, some of them were horrible, but most of our equipment and doctrine was better than the Soviet stuff.  How much better?  Ask Saddam Hussein.

As the focus of our economy was growth, the economy grew.  How big did it grow?  It grew to the point where Reagan could consciously bankrupt the entire guns and butter Soviet economy through pretending that the Star Wars™ missile defense was going to make intercontinental ballistic missiles obsolete.  The economy of Western Civilization was such a potent weapon because it harnessed the ingenuity of everyone through capitalist incentives and rewards.  The system of capitalism was so obviously successful that China®, Inc. decided to copy it for their economy and get rid of the silly Maoist collectivism.  Keep in mind, capitalism does not mean freedom.

Economies still have limits.  There’s a maximum amount of “stuff” that the economy can produce, and certainly there’s a limit based on sheer physics, if nothing else, though we’ve yet to see it.  The real choice isn’t guns or butter, it’s investment versus Free Stuff.  It used to be that money mattered, but that was in the time before Modern Monetary Theory (The Worst Economic Idea Since Socialism, Explained Using Bikini Girl Graphs) fans tossed bottles of Jägermeister© into Congress and told ‘em to spend as much as they wanted.

If Venezuela had a dollar for every time giving out Free Stuff worked, they’d have zero dollars.  Oh, that’s exactly what Venezuela has.  Never mind.

What Free Stuff do the Leftists want to toss out?

• “Free” Healthcare – for everyone. Including illegal aliens.  You might think that they don’t give it away now – they do.  A pregnant illegal alien show ups to have a baby?  You get to pay for that right now.  I guess the good news is you don’t have to change it’s diaper.
• “Free” Daycare – for everyone. Why?  Because who could be better at raising your children than the state.  They do such a good job at the DMV.
• “Free” College – for everyone.  That kid that sat behind you with his finger up his nose, who talked about how he wanted to ride a tyrannosaurus on Mars?  When he was a senior in high school?  Yeah, he gets free college, too.  Although riding a tyrannosaurus on Mars does sound cool.
• “Free” Income – for everyone.  Why not give everyone $1000 a month for free.  It won’t distort the economy at all.
• “Free” Reparations – not for everyone. People who were never slaves would get paid by people who never had slaves, for the sin of slavery.  Makes about as much sense as the rest of this list.
• “Free” Housing – just not in the gated communities where Congressmen live.

Oh, and don’t forget regulations, since regulations is another way to give Free Stuff.  They take freedom from the economy and create winners and losers.  The Green New Deal is an example of this – the idea of the Green New Deal has nothing to do with the environment – it’s all about creating a socialist economy.  In the words of AOC’s advisor:  “Do you guys think of it as a climate thing?” Saikat Chakrabarti asked. “Because we really think of it as a how-do-you-change-the-entire-economy thing.”

Regulations are used to change the economy.

Take a look at all of the innovation spawned by Communism!

At some point Free Stuff will grow to encompass the entire economy leaving nothing for productive growth.  Ever notice that every Communist economy freezes at the technology level (outside of military technology) that existed when it went Commie?  Cuba is a great example, what with all of the vintage 50’s Ford® and Chevy© rust buckets and fine Soviet cars they have on the streets.  If only they would have waited until the 1970’s to go Communist they could have had Ford© Pintos™.  That would have made driving exciting!

The same thing happened in Venezuela.  PDVSA was a very profitable oil company before Hugo Chavez gutted it to provide Free Stuff to the Venezuelan people.  Now?  PDVSA is deeply in debt and incapable of producing as much oil as it did in 1998, despite having 77.5 billion barrels of reserves.

Yeah.  Free Stuff can make a country bankrupt.

The nice thing about this concept is that it also applies to individuals.  Every day each of us has a choice:  do we work to make ourselves better, or do we goof off?  The choice is an important one.

Do you invest time in increasing your capabilities every day?  Do your work to make yourself better?  I mean, really work?  Take Steve Martin’s advice – “Be so good they can’t ignore you.”  (“Be so good they can’t ignore you.”-Steve Martin Plus? A sniper joke.)

You have the choice.  And time is running out.  And I’m certain you can’t afford Free Stuff.