Three Best Stocks To Own After A Nuclear Attack

“It’s not the money, it’s just all the stuff.” – The Jerk

Biden wanted to emulate North Korea’s experience for COVID – Biden liked the way Kim implemented a lockdown.

I was on hold with Tech Support working on site issues (again) when I came up with the post name.  I couldn’t resist, because that’s exactly the sort of headline that I see when I flip through financial pages.  Oh, sure, I could have just as easily gone with “How A Zombie Holocaust Can Help Your Portfolio”, but the nuclear attack seems a wee bit more timely.

As I’ve written before, a big part of wealth isn’t just cash.  It isn’t money.  Queen Elizabeth II may have had a much fancier funeral than I will, but just like Generalissimo Francisco Franco, she’s still very dead even though there are rocks worth hundreds of millions of dollars on top of her coffin.  Money could buy her a lot of stuff and allow her to avoid Markle, but it couldn’t buy her one more minute on the planet than she had.

So, wealth means more than just money.  And as the world seems to be shifting ever so fast under our feet, what are the true components of wealth?

I did hear about one king that was exactly 12” tall.  He was a horrible king, but a good ruler.

First on my list would be having a horde of skilled fanatical barbarian soldiers that do my every bidding.  That’s pretty cool.  Sadly, I can’t find a wizard who’s willing to narrate things like the following every morning when I get out of bed and get ready to go to work:

“Between the time when the oceans drank Atlantis and the rise of the sons of Aryas, there was an age undreamed of.  And unto this, Conan John Wilder, destined to wear the jeweled crown of Aquilonia Modern Mayberry upon a troubled brow.  It is I, his chronicler, who alone can tell thee of his saga.  Let me tell you of the days of high adventure!”

That would be nice.  I guess second on my list would be a wizard-bard to narrate my life, throwing in things like, “And despite having had one too many glasses of wine the night before, John Wilder bravely got up as his alarm went off, brushed his teeth, stared into his mirror, and began the noble process of finding socks to wear today.”

An illiterate wizard is useless.  He can’t spell.

What would be third on my list?  I mean, I’ve already got a fanatical army and a wizard-bard.  Some people work a whole lifetime and don’t get either of those.  At one point, I would have said “Immortal Life” but then I realized that if I lived too long, that would probably void the factory warranty.  So, that’s out, unless those random calls I get on my cell phone about getting an extended warranty aren’t a scam.

But I still need to have a number three on my list.  I’d say food for my fanatical barbarian army, but I think they’d be fine feeding themselves – that’s the advantage of having a barbarian horde – they make their own sauce.  I guess I’ll have to live with surgically altered doubles that look and sound exactly like me.  Why?  If I have a fanatical barbarian army, why wouldn’t they send James Bond® after me?

I always invite Bond over to my BBQ.  He’s got a license to grill.

For my fourth item, I suppose the boring thing would be to look for would be a lair hidden deep underneath a volcano suitable for launching my spaceships.  The big problem is demand.  First, I think Elon Musk has the market cornered.  Second, if James Bond© saw what Great Britain looked like in 2022, he’d probably join up with Blofeld™ because he and Blofeld© probably share more actual British values than Britain does.

I’ll be serious – I wouldn’t turn any of those things down except the doubles.  As irritating as I am, I can’t imagine what it would be like to live with multiple iterations of myself.  And I can’t even imagine the number of socks that would be in the living room.

But what is real wealth outside of money?

I’m going to start with family.  The Mrs., for whatever reason, is on board with my nonsense.  And, as I wrote recently, we are building the people that will take us into the future. They are our children. We build them for the future, so that they can build the future. Of wealth, there is absolutely none more precious.  Except the fanatical barbarian horde.

Yet, more battles are won by infantry than by adultery.

Second on the list is health.  I can only buy this a little.  The rest I either have due to genetics (on one side of my family, I have heard that the only thing that can kill us is gravity), or hard work.  I need to spend a bit more time on the hard work.  And that’s an easy way to invest in myself that has amazing dividends.

Third on the list is skills.  Skills are yet another way of investing in myself.  What kind of skills?  The basic ones are the best – and there is depth required in some of them.  If I garden, it’s not just planting a seed and then walking off to come back later and eat.  Nope.  There are millions of ways to kill a plant, and I know most of them.  Many skills come from simply knowing how to not screw it up.  So, picking the right ones is one way to get to the future.

I debated putting reputation up higher, bud decided that I’d leave it here.  In the world, leadership is a way to multiply yourself.  And that leadership is a function of reputation.  Known as a liar and a cheat?  No man will follow me or trust me.  Known to be a man of my word?  I can have influence far above my level of skills or health.  When General Patton took over the II Corps in North Africa, he had a few weeks to turn them into a fighting force.  That he was able to do so was built on skills, sure, but more than that on his reputation for having an amazing force of will.

The last thing on my list for today is a variation on the first real thing.  Just as my children take me into the future, the inheritance that I got from Pa and Ma Wilder allows me to know what to send into that future.  It is the inheritance of values that I speak of here.

I heard she never carried cash – who wants to carry around pictures of their ex-mother-in-law?

So, on this day, I’m certain of one thing:  I’m wealthier than Queen Elizabeth.  And in better shape, too.  I wouldn’t trade her family for mine.  I’m certain I could beat her at Uno®, so I have skills covered.  Reputation, though is difficult.  I mean she couldn’t hit 100 before she died, though I think she made sure Diana did.

Remember: Your Mission Isn’t Done

“Santa Maria! Captain, you cannot punish the crew like this. They will mutiny!” – Sealab 2021

The big problem with the French Revolution is that lots of folks lost their heads.

Have a long way to drive tomorrow, so here’s a repeat.  Enjoy!

One winter, while hunting elk up on Wilder Mountain, we had, well, an issue.  We were about fifteen or twenty miles in from the nearest pavement, and headed home.

It was overcast.  It was lazily spitting snow, with a breeze that was slowly picking up.  Looking to the west, where there should be a resplendent sunset, the sky was dark, heavy, and pendulous with brooding storm clouds that blotted out even a hint of the winter Sun.

That was when the problem hit.  Pa Wilder, while driving over a “road” that was little more than a common path cut by four-wheel-drive vehicles over the course of decades of hunting and firewood gathering, drove over a small branch that had fallen in the road.  Not a problem, right?

Well, it was a problem.  In this case, the branch had the stem of a broken off limb, sticking straight up.  Pa drove the GMC Jimmy® right over that sharp shard of limb.

In the span of a dozen or so feet, we had lost not one, but two tires.  It penetrated the center of each tire, poking a hole the size of a half-dollar coin in each.

Amazingly, we had lost another tire already that day, already.

Ahhh, I remember this trip.  Those were the Goodyears®.

We now had a four-wheel drive with five tires and three flats.  In winter.  As a blizzard approached and night was setting in.  And all of this was in country where it could easily hit -40°F as night descended.

I bring this up to say that we had a mission.  Our mission at that point in time was to get home.  There were several challenges, and I’m pretty sure if most people were in the backcountry as a blizzard was descending that the last person they would choose would be a 12-year-old boy to be a guy on the team.

Which is sad.

Children can have missions.  Children can face danger.  Children can do important things.  We forget that because we’re in a society that doesn’t give children important things to do, mostly.  Midshipmen in the Royal Navy were as young as 14.

I hear the Russians just canceled their Penguin Army program.  Now all they have left is Navy Seals.

To be clear:  Midshipmen in the Royal Navy were 14.  A midshipman is an officer.  If you were unaware, the Royal Navy wasn’t a social club, and often those boys fought in wars.  As officers.

So we forgot that boys can be given real, substantial responsibility.  But there’s also the chance that we forget something else:  that each of us is on a mission.  And each of us has a role to play.

We currently are in a place where freedom is an increasingly precious and rare commodity.  It’s not just in the United States – Trump may have said, “Make America Great Again” but down under they seem to be following the “Make Australia A Prison Again” plan.  And Canada?

I love our Canadabros that come by regularly (Canada is the second-largest readership here), but Canada seems to be determined to become the Soviet Above the 49th Parallel, led by that Tundra Trotsky, Trudeau.

Pictured in background:  the only two Canadians Justin’s mother didn’t have sex with.

It seems like in this day and age we all have a mission.  Just like 12 isn’t too young, 80 isn’t too old.

Frankly, we need all hands on deck.  The size of the mission is the largest on the North American continent since 1774.  I almost wrote that the idea was to preserve the Constitution and the Republic.  Seriously, I’d love nothing more than to write that.

I’d love for that to happen.  I’d love for us to come together.  I’d settle for the laws to look like they did 90 years ago.  Heck, even 70 years ago.  That would be preferable to today.

A reversion, sadly, is impossible.

Whatever will come from tomorrow will not look like the past.  It may be a shadow.  The Holy Roman Emperors weren’t Roman.  And the Holy Roman Empire wasn’t the Roman Empire.

And I hear that soon enough he’ll be sending ambassadors to the Ottoman Empire, too.  Can’t you just sniff the leadership?

Or it may be something entirely different.

I think it will be entirely different.

And that’s where you come in.  Yes, you.

You have a mission to create a new nation here.  It won’t look like what we have today – it simply cannot, since we have created a situation that is at the far end of stability, but more on that Wednesday.

I assure you, you play a part.    The initial conditions of what happens are crucial to the final outcome.  If George Washington had wanted to be King?  If Thomas Jefferson had been a Martian Terminator Robot like the one that keeps triggering my motion detector lights at night even though the sheriff won’t believe me?

Things would be entirely different.

And you are important.  Your actions in the next decade are critical to the creation of what will come after.  Do we want a nation that will be based on slavery, control, and that eternal boot stamping on a human face?

I’d vote no.  If you’re a regular here, I’m betting that’s your vote, too.

I think everything he wrote was Orwellian.

If so, let me shout as loudly as I can:  You Are Not Done.  This is Not Over.  What is it that you can do to create a world where freedom beats slavery?  What can you do to create a world where children can run free from the indoctrination of an all-powerful, all-regulating state?

There’s a lot.

Our nation was, thankfully, built on the consent of the governed.  Most things that local government provides, we want.  To quote Python, Monty:

But apart from the sanitation, the medicine, education, wine, public order, irrigation, roads, the fresh-water system, and public health, what have the Romans ever done for us?

To be clear:  the Federal government does very little to make anything in the list above better, and often does a lot to make them worse.  Except for the interstate highways.  Those are actually pretty cool.

But I will tell you – you are the seed of the future of this country.  You are the seed of the future of this continent.

Never cross a Scrabble® player.  They’ll send you threatening letters.

You are the seed of the future of this world.  It doesn’t matter how old you are.  The time is coming, and coming quickly where great injustices will be attempted.  And you are the seed to make what comes after better for humanity.  Would the world rather live in 1950’s America or 1930’s U.S.S.R.?

The choice is stark.

Your mission is clear.  How will you act to make your county, your state, your country one where free men can walk?

It’s up to you.

Back to the mountain.

For me, it was a game.  That’s the advantage of being 12.  Pa Wilder and my older brother (also named John due to a typographical error) and I wheeled the tires so we had two good ones in front.  We locked in the hubs on the four-wheel drive.

I don’t know if you’ve ever tried to drive up a mountain path in a car with only two tires in a snowstorm as it got darker every minute.  It doesn’t work very well.  The flat back wheels couldn’t push the Jimmy® up the hill.

That’s where I came in.  It was my job to take the winch cable, run up the hill, and loop the cable up the base of a tree.  Pa would then use the combination of the winch and the two front tires to pull the Jimmy© up.

Tree by tree, cable length by cable length, we worked pretty flawlessly as a team to get the Jimmy™ to the top of the hill.  Thankfully, for the most part it was downhill from there.  Although Pa was driving on the rims, we got it home.

Don’t let the jack slip on your foot when you’re changing a tire.  You might need a toe.

Was there danger?  Certainly, there always is.  We had snow, so we had water.  Ma would have called the Sheriff not too long after dusk, and even though the mountains were a labyrinth of roads, people had seen us.  We also had matches, hatchets, wool blankets, gasoline, and a mountain’s worth of firewood to keep us warm.

But we also had a mission.  Each of us served our purpose, and we got home.

Pa was a bit raw about having to buy two new rims and three new tires for a day’s worth of not seeing any elk, though.  For the record, I never saw a single elk when hunting with Pa.  I’m telling you, that man knew how to hunt.  Finding?  Sometimes I think he just wanted a good drive in the woods and hike with his boys, teaching them about living.  Teaching them about missions, and the part that they play, whether they know it or not.

In this life, we all have a mission, and we all play a part in it.  I can assure you that your part is not done, because you’re above ground, breathing, and reading this.

I hate to repeat something so trite, but in this case, it’s true:  you are not done.  This is not over.  And the whole world depends . . . on you.

It’s up to you.  You will create the future.

So, go do it.

American Civil War: Four Fates, From Freedom to Soviet Tyranny

“Did we give up when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor?  No!” – Animal House

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On this blog recently someone commented, “When I was a kid, people used to say that ‘It’s a free country,’ but they don’t say that anymore.”  I tried it out the other day.  The response?  “It hasn’t been a free country in a while.”  I turned him into the FBI for that kind of hate think.

Again, this is a repost from back in 2020, partially because I’m going to add it on the Civil War 2.0 Weather Report page, and partially because it seemed a good fit as we keep sliding down.

I was driving around and one of the videos that was in my suggested list was about “America’s Cold Civil War.”  This isn’t a review of the video, but it brought up some interesting points.  The one I want to make clear to every single person that loves freedom in the United States is:  if you’ve ever seen a movie about that rag-tag elements of a group fighting a foe that has nearly utterly defeated them, it’s us.  We are the Wolverines.

I get to be Charlie Sheen, mainly because he’s still alive.  I think.

I don’t mean to say that to create a feeling of defeat – far from it.  But the first step in dealing with a situation is understanding reality.  And reality is very simple today.  At a minimum, the Left has coopted the following elements of culture in the United States – they have been, over time, “converged” into Leftism:

  • The K-12 educational system.
  • Colleges and Universities.
  • Most Protestant religious organizations.
  • Most Catholic organizations.
  • The psychological establishment.
  • The American Medical Association.
  • All mainstream news media.
  • All mainstream entertainment media.
  • Most departments of the Federal government, absent the armed services.
  • The general officer corps of the armed services.
  • The courts.
  • Silicon Valley tech companies.
  • Many (but not all) Fortune® 500™ companies.

This isn’t an accident, it’s entirely by plan.  And not only by plan, it’s by a plan that was entirely shared.  From Verified Communist Traitor® Herbert Marcuse, in his book Counterrevolution and Revolt (bold added):

To extend the base of the student movement, Rudi Dutschke has proposed the strategy of the long march through the institutions:  working against the established institutions while working within them, but not simply by ‘boring from within’, rather by ‘doing the job’, learning (how to program and read computers, how to teach at all levels of education, how to use the mass media, how to organize production, how to recognize and eschew planned obsolescence, how to design, et cetera), and at the same time preserving one’s own consciousness in working with others.

I could prove all of the above Institutions have been converged through the Long March Through the Institutions and will probably discuss a few of these in the future, because I could do a post on each one.  Heck, maybe it would be a great book, but only if I could figure out how to pair hot chicks and communist propaganda.

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East German girl swimmers bench pressing 300 pounds in 1976 is completely normal.

But if you doubt me, you have Google® (itself converged) and you can easily verify list above even through the Leftist-bias that’s now on that search engine.  I’ll leave you with one more question:  why else would Fortune© 500® corporations sign a manifesto saying profits were less important than social goals if Leftists weren’t in control?  Because there were extra doughnuts in the breakroom and they were feeling generous?

In almost any context, these organizations reflect the values of the Left, not of the Right.  I specifically don’t use the label conservative here – the conservative movement has utterly failed in the United States (to quote absolutely everyone) to conserve anything.  We live a country where adults telling four year old boys that being a girl is okie-dokie (and vice-versa) aren’t thrown directly in prison for a decade or more (after a trial, of course) for child abuse.  The goals of the above organizations would be cause for mass revolt if they had been publicized in 1990, but now, despite no vote, no public acceptance, each point of the Left has been accepted as the new normal.

And telling a boy that he’s a girl?  Oh, wait, that’s brave.  Sorry.

Despite all of that, this is not a post about giving up.  Screw that.  Each day makes me more independent, not less, more wanting to tell the truth.

And if you’re reading this, no one is done here.  Freedom is always the underdog.  I really wish we’d just stop waiting until 2:00 in the fourth quarter to start playing.

I remember seeing a film in Social Studies in High School about the Korean War.  In the black and white film, almost all of Korea had been lost.  The film ended right at what is known as the Pusan Perimeter, right where the North Korean Army was about to kick freedom off of the Korean peninsula, forever.  It was tough watching that film.

But then we learned what happened next:  MacArthur led the naval invasion of Inchon and turned the tide of battle, leading a combined United Nations® force that cut off the North Koreans.  This turned the course of the war, and in the process helped to create the free country of South Korea that is a world leader in technology, bad music videos, and wealth creation today.

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Spoiler alert:  we tied.

Our Pusan Perimeter is now.  I had a great boss once upon a time, he would continually remind me, “John, start with the end in mind,” which is #2 of Covey’s Seven Habits of Highly Effective People.  As I look at the state of the Right back in 2016, we were at the Pusan Perimeter.  As we as a nation blindly stumble toward Civil War II, I can’t predict the outcome, but I can see the full range of outcomes.

We’ll go from best case to worst case for people who love freedom.  Although there are variations, I think I’ve captured all of the big picture end games below.

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I named operation Aesop after the Raconteur Report’s Aesop.  You can read him here (LINK).

Operation Aesop:  Total victory.

What it is:  The Right wins.  Traditional society is restored.  Mothers and fathers in committed relationships are again honored.  A Constitutional republic of limited government replaces the democracy of unlimited power.  The United States is unified.  Think of it as a return to the 1950’s, but with color TV and microwaves.

What it takes:  Oh, not much more than the bloodiest war in the history of the country.  The only way this results in victory is as Von Clausewitz wrote about in On War:   [Accomplishing . . . ] “three broad objectives, which between them cover everything:  destroying the enemy’s armed forces; occupying his country; and breaking his will to continue the struggle.”

That’s what happened in the first Civil War.  That’s what happened to the Germans and Japanese in World War II.  The concept of continuing was even more horrific than the concept of trying to continue to fight.  It’s total capitulation.  This is actual war until the enemy is not capable of continuing.  Not talking heads on a television show.  Not voting.  Not discussion.  Not a “mission accomplished” after five weeks moving across Iraq where the “will to continue the struggle” is still clearly intact.

Outcomes:  Some freedoms we see now would be curtailed.  Political discourse would be constrained.  But teenagers would be pretty polite, again.  And you wouldn’t really have to worry about the border.

I’m related to Patrick Henry, or so my aunt told me.  I like to imagine Patrick getting a bit tipsy and writing mean letters to Madison about how short Madison was and how Dolly might want to give up on the chew.

Operation Founding Fathers:  50 Independent States. 

What it is:  A return to base principles.  Originally, the United States was conceived as just that, independent free States.  The majority of decisions to be made were to be made at the state, and not the Federal level.  Each state was to be free to make decisions.  Texas could be Texas.  California could be Venezuela.  Vermont could be stoned.  The free decisions of free States was allowed.  The free movement of free peoples was likewise allowed.  This is returning to that state.

What it takes:  Leftist thought is built around the universal adoption of their principles.  Individuals in society cannot be left to make decisions, so this is a hateful outcome to the Left.  I recall discussing politics with a Leftist when I was younger.  The Leftist thought I was on the Right.  That, at least they could deal with.  When I identified as a Libertarian®?  The look of disgust was clear – the Left hated Libertarians™ more than they hated the Right.  The Right was merely amused and not threatened by Libertarians©.  Maybe it was the Star Wars® shirts and poorly trimmed beards?

That taught me one thing:  the thing the Left hates the most is  . . . freedom.  Liberty.  In many ways the Left would rather lose a shooting war and be subjugated to the views of the Right than to be allowed to turn Seattle into the Siberia of the PacNorthwest.

The only way this can take place outside of warfare is a Second Constitutional Convention.  I think that alone would lead to a shooting war from the Left and a complete revolt from all of the Leftist institutions shown above.  But we can dream that the Second Constitutional Convention would turn out well.  If we did it, oh, in the next year.  The clock is ticking on this being a viable outcome.  It’s probably time to do it now.  As in, well, now.  Conservatives (not the Right) seem to feel that everything is going to come out fine, so until the wolf is at the door, I don’t think they’ll move an inch.

The problem is that Conservatives (again, not the Right) seem to think that the Left likes the Constitution.  Since the Left gained the institutions I’ve listed above, the Left doesn’t care about the Constitution – the Left cares about power.  Pure, unadulterated, 18 year old with a 12 pack of Coors Light™ behind the wheel of a 1969 Camero® power.

Outcomes:  In many ways this is the best outcome, but in my opinion the most unlikely.  This is the only outcome where we can still have the full freedom of political discourse and the full Bill of Rights.  I’d love to turn over freedom to choose to a California that can choke itself to death on Leftist feelgoodism while a Rightist Arizona can deny admission to every illegal and return them via a trebuchet if they want to.

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I was expecting more girls in bikinis from Bruckheimer, but this is a good start.

Operation Fort Sumter:  Going our separate ways.

What it is:  Secession.  Splitting up.  It’s not you, it’s me Oregon.  The problem is that unlike in 1860, the dividing lines aren’t so clear.  Then there was a line which, if everyone agreed, would have been fine for a split.  The North could be the North, the South could be the South.  Oops.  Now it would be a county by county fight.

What it takes:  Just like a psycho ex-girlfriend, if the Right tried to succeed in Texas, the Left wouldn’t accept it, and would demand tanks on the banks Red River by morning, which would be hilarious because tanks don’t float.  Unless the secession were overwhelming in number of states, numbers of the armed forces, and nearly immediate, I see only a small path to a peaceful secession.  For secession to stick, the Left and Right would have to feel that conquering the other side was more costly than trying to forge a peace.

Outcomes:  If secession happened and was maintained, the United States would be irrevocably broken, unless it was re-stitched by a Caesar sequentially conquering the Balkanized United States.  Maybe Caesar Pugsley Wilder the First?

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Think they need a reason to send you to the Gulag?  Sure they do!  It’s Monday – that’s good enough.

Operation Gulag in The Dakotas:

What it is:  This is the darkest timeline not only for our nation but for our world.  And, amazingly, the only timeline (outside of a Second Constitutional Convention) that we can vote ourselves into.  It is the Leftist takeover of everything.  Although it is sold as a Denmark, in reality Denmark is capitalist with stronger social institutions because Denmark is, well, Danish and I think they put mayo on their fries.  In the United States it will look much more like the U.S.S.R. – but not the basketcase 1988 U.S.S.R., but more like the 1932 “starve to death millions of citizens that Stalin doesn’t like” (In the World Murder Olympics, Communists Take Gold and Silver!) U.S.S.R.

What it takes:  Nothing.  We keep going as it is.  In less than 20 years, we will be in complete tyranny.  The erosion of rights we have seen won’t continue in a linear fashion.  It will accelerate.

Outcomes:  1984.

Now we know the stakes.

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Big Brother is our friend!  And we’ve always been at war with Eastasia.

Is the Vaxx AIDS?

“Um, well, as with any new vaccine, there were certain side effects associated with it.” – Evolution

I tried to get a refund on some bad batteries I bought.  They wouldn’t give me one, since they said the batteries were free of charge.

Hey, I’ve got a golden oldie from, oh, right before the Russians invaded Ukraine:  the ‘Rona.

I am not vaxxed.  I am not jabbed.  I thought about it, but they told me there were no refunds, so I opted out.  But I have had the ‘Rona.  I haven’t been tested to prove that, but The Mrs. was tested and had the antibodies.  So did Pugsley.  I was around those two losers enough if it is physically possible for me to get it, I’ve had it.  I even remember the afternoon I had it.  Felt a bit bad, had a temperature of 99°F (345 km) that day, and thought about going home early.

I’ve had it.  It wasn’t especially bad.  But then I was exposed again:  I sat for several hours next to a person who had it, 13 days ago.  He was vaxxed.  Again, if I caught whatever variant this was, I had no symptoms other than some extra phlegm.  And who doesn’t want extra phlegm?  It makes it so much easier to hock a gnarly loogie.

I give that to you only as background, though I freely admit I do appreciate the aesthetics of hocking a good loogie.  In all the people I’ve ever met in my life, I know of only a single person who died of the ‘Rona – and when I heard he had died, my response was, “He was still alive?  He was old!”  I did the math, and he was approximately 473 years old.

After getting the vaxx, my friend can’t hear himself urinate.  I guess the p is silent.

I have talked to friends that have lost older loved ones as well.  One of my friends even lost two relatives in their fifties – which was pretty young for COVID.

So, that’s the background.

As I said before, I’m not vaxxed.  I was against it because I generally believe the mice should do human trials before people.

So, what are the long-term implications of the vaxx?

Right now, some implications are showing up that look a bit grim.

One of the big concerns that had shown up in past trials of vaccines against strains of Coronavirus had been, well, AIDS.  The problem was that the vaccines that we tried to create made our immune system act like Nancy Pelosi surrounded by bottles of vodka – useless.  Oh, wait, that’s just regular Nancy Pelosi.

The concern of vaccines is that they can, sometimes, cause “immune dysregulation” which means the immune system doesn’t work right.  T-Cells, which are the semi-trucks that make the immune system work, have life cycle.  Those are the guys that roam around the blood stream and look for stuff that isn’t right – and kill it.

Sadly, still no refunds.

T-cells are like a Terminator® against disease.  No, that language won’t get me a doctorate in immunology, but since I’m typing this while watching a James Bond movie (Diamonds are Forever) while drinking wine, that ship has probably sailed.

To quote an actual immunologist-doctor dude named Bowdish stated, “Once a T cell commits to responding to one thing, it can’t respond to anything else.  As we age, more and more of them become committed to responding to infections, or all the other things we might be exposed to, and fewer and fewer are available to respond to new threats.”

Huh.

A super-short version of the nightmare scenario is this:  the vaxx injects mRNA, which creates a storm of COVID spike proteins.  The original thought was that there was a burst of these would tickle the neck of the immune system, give it a thrill and then be gone – which is not how the mRNA vaxx works – it’s really gene therapy.  Gene therapy might be a technology that will change the future, but right now, it appears to me it’s like we’re taking sledgehammers to fix a fine gold pocket watch.

Oops.  Apparently, the mRNA concoction (in some studies) stays active longer than anticipated.  Beyond that, the spike proteins don’t degrade very rapidly in the body.  The result?  They keep on jazzing the immune system.  But they don’t give a full picture of the virus that a T cell normally would attack, just the spike.

Still no refunds.

So, the vaxx hijacks the immune system and causes it to focus for a really, really long time on only one portion of the actual virus, and not respond like (for instance) mine did when I actually had the ‘Rona in looking at the whole virus, and not just a tiny bit of it like someone who was injected with mRNA vaxx.

This is bad.

It focuses a big chunk of the immune system on a single part of the virus, and ignores the rest.  Minor modifications would then lead people who had the Two Shots and All The Boosters® to be more and not less susceptible to the ‘vid.

This is combined with all of the other signs that we’ve seen:  amazing numbers of very healthy, world-class athletes either collapsing or just plain dying in the prime of their life in numbers like we’ve never seen before.

And, in the end, for what?

COVID wasn’t pleasant during the afternoon I had it.  And it absolutely killed quite a few people.  But it wasn’t going to kill kids.  And it wasn’t going to kill hardly anyone below the age of 50.

If I had taken the vaxx, I’d be mad.  Very mad.  They were marketed as safe.  They’re not.  Tens of thousands have died from them, and there are reports coming in that female fertility had been impacted.  They were marketed as effective.  As the last data seems to show, they vaxxed are more likely to get COVID than the unvaxxed.

Perhaps he has an agenda?

No, he’s clearly well respected.

In order to get people to take this untested new technology, the government engaged in massive amounts of unfounded and knowingly false propaganda and, in the end, coercion.  The ‘rona itself was a disaster, but in the end, the betrayal by every edifice of our public sector is worse.

I am in hopes that the worst is past.  I don’t wish evil on any person.  But in the case of the vaxx?  There’s one theme:  no refunds.

The Lie of Living Your Best Life (now including cookies)

“Smoking marijuana, eating Cheetos® and masturbating does not constitute plans in my book.” – Breaking Bad

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In a constantly downward spiral, Kermit finally found the downside in living his best life.

I thought I’d take a bit of a night off, here’s something that many current readers might not have seen . . . .

A few weeks ago my daughter, Alia S. Wilder was in town.  We were in the middle of preparing dinner of steak, steak, and more steak for the grill when I saw Alia diving face first into a plate of cookies.

When she came up for air I asked innocently, “I thought you were on the keto diet?”

I did notice a mood change when I was on the keto diet:  I got tired of cheese and my only joy in life consisted of watching television shows about murder.

“No, she said, “I’m living my best life.”  I could even hear the italics in her voice.  It’s amazing how well font choice carries in my kitchen.  I think it’s the tile.

John Wilder:  “Umm, what exactly does ‘my best life’ mean?”  I thought I could tell by context, but I wanted to give her a chance to explain.

Alia S. Wilder:  “It’s living your life by being who you are naturally.  It’s doing what you want.”

I slowly shook my head.  That’s exactly what I thought it was.  Cue volcano erupting:

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One of the nice things about being a parent is that you can be honest with your children when they are being utterly foolish.  This was one of those times.

My first words were:  “You know this is going to go into the blog, right?”

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Is this why they hold the neighborhood block party when we leave for vacation?

I then started a tirade.  As this was the second time that I’d met her boyfriend, you’d think I’d hold back to give a good impression that I was a nice, genteel father who wears cardigan sweaters and puts on loafers and talks to hand puppets as if they were real.  You’d be wrong, and I tried the hand puppet thing, but one of my personalities thought it was creepy.  No, Mr. Rogers© wasn’t here that night.  I let loose with a full broadside worthy of Nelson’s fleet at Trafalgar.

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I was a horrible pirate captain.  They told me, “The cannon be ready,” and I responded “are.”

“You realize that’s the single stupidest piece of advice you’ve ever been given, right?”  I continued, not even having gotten warmed up yet.  “It’s the advice a teenager thinks up in the shower and then considers it a deep thought because, well they’re a teenager in middle school, and middle school age children are the single stupidest subspecies ever set loose on planet Earth.”  I paused for breath.  You need decent lung capacity if you’re going to go into full rage enhanced by spittle.

I continued.  “Why is it stupid?  Because people are awful.  You’re awful.  I’m awful.  We have to work each minute to NOT do what we’d like, because what we’d like to do, if left only to our own desires is . . . also awful.  You, me, every single one of us.”

I could feel the full rolling boil starting.

Living my best life is the strategy of a three-year-old that wants to eat an entire box of Oreos® at one sitting and then lie about it and blame the poodle.  Living my best life combines all of the worst ideas of abandoning duty, honor, and responsibility in only four words:  ‘living my best life.’  Oh, I decided not to work today.  I’m living my best life.  I decided that I would rather spend my money on avocado-flavored non-fat organic vaping juice rather than baby formula.  I’m living my best life.  I don’t care if I offended you, I have to speak my truth when living my best life.  Oh, I’m sorry Western Civilization, we can’t go back to the Moon and advance the human race to the stars because I’m busy shopping.  I’m living my best life.”

What came to my mind during this tirade conversation were the words of the dead French scientist, mathematician, religious philosopher and part-time Uber driver Blaise Pascal:

“Man’s greatness comes from knowing that he is wretched:  a tree does not know it is wretched.  Thus, it is wretched to know that one is wretched, but there is greatness in knowing that one is wretched.”

In this quote when Pascal wrote “wretched,” he meant, “of inferior quality; bad.”

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Follow your nose, it always knows.  Specifically all about pressure, mathematics, and designing a computer by the age of 19, in 17th Century France.

Pascal didn’t think mankind was naturally awful, he knew that mankind was naturally awful:  prideful, selfish, lustful, mean, and greedy.  I’m not sure how Pascal got that idea, maybe he was picked on about nose size when he was in middle school.  But he was correct.  We’re inferior.  But our greatness comes not from that obvious inferior quality, it comes from knowing that you’re awful, and then not being awful.

If we know that we’re awful, we can do something about it.  If we think that being awful is okay, that we can live our best life, then it’s an excuse to be awful.  In fact, it’s worse than that.  Aleister Crowley wrote, “Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law,” which has been appropriated by the Church of Satan® and correctly interpreted to mean . . . do whatever you want to do.

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Apparently living your best life allows you to dress like Dr. Evil on a regular basis.

One particular website (not gonna given ‘em a link, they’re the first one listed when you Google® “living my best life”) has a list, which includes the following gems of personally corrosive advice on how to live your best life (note, my comments are in italics):

  • Do what you want – let your inner three-year-old make all your decisions.
  • Speak your truth – not the truth, your truth since hearing the actual, real truth from other people might make you sad.
  • Practice sacred self-love – and everyone should celebrate you for your sacred self-love since you deserve to live your best life because you suffered so much because of your (INSERT VICTIM STATUS QUALIFICATION HERE).

Not all of the advice on the website was horrible, but most of it was shallower than the gene pool that produced Johnny Depp your typical congressman.

  • So, under this philosophy, if I’m fat, the problem isn’t that I’m fat and should have fewer cookies: the problem is the world is fataphobic.
  • If I think I’m a cat, the problem isn’t that I’m delusional: the problem is that the world is transspeciesphobic.
  • If I think that being an American has nothing to do with the values and norms of the last 300 years: the problem is your problem for being tied to the past.

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When the cookies ran out, the monster came out.

So, in summary, living your best life is nothing more than permission to be the very worst person you can be.  All that being said, Alia S. Wilder really does make some tasty cookies.

28 Things That Make Me Happy

“Happy premise #3: Even though I feel like I might ignite, I probably won’t.” – Bowfinger

Why can’t you make coffee happy?  It’s always bitter.

What makes me happy?  Oh, sure, like everyone else I love it when Joe Biden falls off a bicycle and want to start a GoFundMe® to buy him a 350 horsepower motorcycle.  But beyond that motorcycle, what really makes me happy?

A lot of things.  So, the following are a few of them, in an absolutely random order:

  1. Helping people see what they otherwise would not have seen. That’s why I write.
  2. Writing.
  3. Helping people laugh. I stood up in front of several hundred adults when I was in third grade and did a standup routine.    It was awful.  Why do third graders not do standup?  Their material is awful.  I have been writing humor since about that time.
  4. A good cigar. I smoke them rarely enough that my insurance company calls me a non-smoker.  But sitting down in the hot tub with one and staring out at the peaceful night sky in Modern Mayberry as the coyotes creep out of their dens to howl at sunset?
  5. A good book. I’ve read several this year, and was planning on doing a post about those.  Regardless, a book is transformative.  I like mine in paper – something about the tactile feel of the book is hypnotic.  E-books are convenient, but are less immersive.
  6. A bad book. I generally learn something even from those.

I once mixed a snake with a fruit.  I called it a bananaconda.

  1. Cool days. I am really not a fan of summer except at elevations above a mile and a half or latitudes near that of Fairbanks.  Winter?  Never seen one too cold.
  2. The smooth taste of a cup of coffee in the morning makes me hate waking up a bit less.  Don’t get me wrong, I know that I have to get up, and to move from comfort to discomfort if I want to accomplish anything.  Coffee is our bitter friend that makes being awake work for me.
  3. Making the world better in big ways. If I can make the world a little bit better for thousands of people I don’t know, awesome.  I’ve been lucky enough to do that a time or two.
  4. Making the world better in small ways. I tip well and don’t complain (much) when I go out to eat.  Waitresses, even crappy ones, work hard so I don’t want to make their lives harder when for a couple of bucks I can make it better.

Chuck Norris and Superman® wrestled once.  Loser had to wear his underwear on the outside of his clothes for the rest of his life.

  1. Being with my family. Good heavens, I love those dunderheads.  The thing that family provides is, perhaps, the only lasting legacy that I’ll leave.
  2. I had a friend once who is an Orthodox Priest (I seem to attract priests and clergy – I have no idea why) and he asked me a simple, but profound question, “If you love learning, is that a good thing?”  Great question!  My only answer that I’ve come up with so far is that to know Truth takes us closer to knowing God.  To know what is False tells us what is not God.  Still a great question, and I can see the idea that learning can sometimes be a distraction that takes us away from Truth.
  3. Making liars uncomfortable. I have no idea why, but I cannot abide by those that aren’t faithful, and those that lie (there’s a difference).  I’ve heard it said that we all lie, and I must admit that in my youth I told a few.  I’ve since learned that I cannot escape the Truth so I try to be as faithful to Truth as much as I can be.  Has telling the Truth cost me when a lie would never have been caught?    Was it worth it?  Yes.  My honor is clean.  It’s not my job to judge, but when I can make them feel pain?  I love it.
  4. Good music. What do I like about music?  I like optimistic music, music that looks to a future that, while it might mean there’s a fight, means that there is hope.  Rock and roll used to be that music before it got whiney.
  5. A good mystery. I love being able to take clues and figure out the real answer.  Sometimes it works.  Sometimes it doesn’t.

In the 1970s, Led Zep™ went on vacation, so Pink Floyd® tended their gardens.  So, Roger Waters Robert’s Plants?

  1. Knowing that the main limitation to what I do in the world is me. I am lucky enough to be able to choose what (mostly) I want to do.  Because of that, my choices define my destiny.  Not Destiny, that’s a stripper that works down in McMaynerbury.
  2. Camping is a way to get away from the things that make us comfortable.  Huh?  I thought comfortable was happy?  No. Comfortable is comfortable.  When camping away from all of the things that mask us from the realities of the basic functions of life it leads me to focus on them, and understand that life in a cold tent in the rain after eating food that was poorly cooked is . . . still pretty good.  Comfort isn’t happiness.
  3. Knowing that there is much more on Heaven and Earth than is dreamt of in my philosophy. I believe, as the man said to those dudes in Corinth, we “see through a glass, darkly.”  I know that there is imperfection in what I know, and what I understand.  I also know that, (at least) as long as I’m alive, I’ll never understand it all.  How cool is that!?!?  We live in a time and place where we’ll never have all the answers.  The game is afoot.
  4. Being on time. I hate being late – I think it shows disrespect to those that you’re meeting.  When I’m on time, and not rushed?  It’s wonderful.  So, I try to do that because it makes me happy.
  5. Sleeping in. I love to sleep in.  It’s awesome.  What makes it awesome?  Getting up early.  I hate that – that’s why getting up early is awesome.

Fush u mang?

  1. Knowing that I have to do things that are uncomfortable to grow. Getting up early is one.  So, doing things I don’t like, things that are uncomfortable make me happy because I know that’s a chance to grow.
  2. Knowing that the most important thing I’ll ever do is probably in front of me.
  3. Or not.
  4. Fixing something. When something is broken it actively makes me unhappy every time I see it or have to deal with it.  Weirdly, I get an outsized amount of happiness in dealing with the things that I fixed or made better.
  5. Starting something. Every start is a new journey.  What an adventure!

After reading the dictionary, every other book is just a remix.

  1. Finishing something. Every completion is something in the past, something that I’ve done to my standard.  What’s next?
  2. Doing something pure. I used to make models, and sometimes I’d look at the unpainted model and love the purity of the completed plane or tank or starship.  I almost hated to paint it.  And then when the painting was done?  Also awesome.  But building something new and perfect is a thumb in the eye of entropy.
  3. Watching my children achieve. Like I said above, my children are perhaps my only legacy.  In three generations, most memories of me will likely be gone, so I’ll live on in the world only in the legacy of my children.  And maybe that makes me happiest.

Now about that motorcycle.  A Harley® or a Ninja™?

Why We Are The Luckiest People, Ever.

“Keep a memory of me, not as a king or a hero, but as a man.  Fallible and flawed.” – Beowulf

Donate one kidney, you’re a hero.  Donate six, and all of a sudden you’re a monster.

We are the luckiest people who have ever lived.

“Why, John Wilder, you must be insane!  Look at what’s going on,” you say.  Well, the nice men at the sanitarium said that the whole “insane” thing was in the past, especially since the surgery.  The doctor said the lobotomy was a no-brainer.

But really I believe that we are lucky.

When you look at the state of society, we see an amazing breakdown.  I chronicle that breakdown, week after week with this blog.  We see our government falling apart.  We see it brimming with fraud.  We see our lives mocked and insulted.

I hear summer in Finland is the best day of the year.

Functional cultures run on shared values.  The values built over hundreds or thousands of years of hard-fought experience on how to make that culture work?  To make a stable government?  These are all being subverted.

Discarded.

On purpose.

In a time like that, it’s easy to give in to depression.  It’s easy to give in to despair.

Seriously, though, why would you?

We can’t lose.  Why?

My boss calls me the computer at work:  if left unattended for ten minutes, I go to sleep.

We have the whole world against us.  We are called horrible names because we have beliefs rooted in those timeless values.  Even though they hate us, they’re more than happy to take the fruits of our labor – to tax and to take our productivity.  Despite that, at every point our politicians again and again take the road that gives them power – a road that is rooted in evil and lies.

And the world?  Many in the whole world have fallen for the lies, utterly.  Timeless values are overturned in the span of less than a decade.  In 2000, if young boys were dancing nearly nude in the streets, dressed as women, taking money from men, there would have been arrests.

Now, the pictures are printed and celebrated.

This is not evil, this is the Evil of books for children, of such a caricature that they’re nearly comical.  Charles Schumer?  Nancy Pelosi?  Joe Biden?  Soros?  Really?  They’re so over the top Evil that central casting wouldn’t send them to a serious movie – they’d be given roles as the Wet Bandits from Home Alone.

Pictured:  Chuck Schumer and Nancy Pelosi.

Their tactics are no better.  They brag about being tolerant while using the power of government and media to ruthlessly suppress any opposing voices.  They use the levers of government selectively – citizens visiting the Capitol on January 6, 2021 is the worst thing that ever happened.  Riots in the streets causing billions in damage, theft so brazen that stores pull out of major metropolitan areas?  They celebrate that.  Congress is used, again and again, to pass laws that push society away from values, destroy the family, and increase the power of the government over the governed.  Oddly, anarchists and Antifa® applaud that, and celebrate things that even thirty years ago would be called tyranny.

They hate us.  They are attempting to use the education system to make children hate the very culture and society that allowed the prosperity that they’re leeching off even now.  They want to erase the history that built this nation and the heroes that tamed a frontier and invented entire industries.

Galileo said that everything falls at the same speed.  He never saw Biden’s stock market.

Why do you think they want to destroy and desecrate our monuments?  Why do they hate our flag?  Why fill the media with propaganda?

They want parents to fear children in a mirror of the Soviet era.  They want to turn wives against husbands.  They want to split the atom that makes up society, the family, and replace it with the state.  Even religious institutions are rotting from within as the values of the Current Year replace the values that have proven themselves for over 2,000 years.

I started drinking brake fluid – it’s okay, though.  I can stop anytime.

That, my friends, is why we’re lucky.

Our backs to the wall, the entire world against us, we owe our enemy nothing.  We stand by our beliefs.  We stand by God.  We stand by our families, our wives, and our children.  We stand by the future that we are even now building.  To win, we will need to show virtue, courage, and strength greater than any generation that has ever lived.

We will do so.

We are in a place to bring heroism back to our world.  The future will remember us, not as the remnants of a world gone past, but as the founders of a world reborn.  They will speak of us for a thousand years.  They will write stories about us.  They will write songs about us.

That is why we are lucky.

Wilder’s Principle Of Greatest Amusement

“Get old, you can’t even cuss someone and have it bother ’em. Everything you do is either worthless or sadly amusing.” – Bubba Ho-Tep

Hunter wanted to start a new delivery service, but Instagram® was already taken.

I’ve stumbled on a principle that I think is currently guiding the flow of history.  Being a very humble person, I have named this Wilder’s Principle of Greatest Amusement.  Put simply, it’s the idea that if there are two more or less equal outcomes, the most amusing outcome will happen.  It’s like instead of being dead or alive, Schrödinger’s Cat had a choice of being a polar bear or nuclear warhead.

Amusing, in this context, doesn’t necessarily mean good.  It doesn’t mean beneficial.  The late, great comedian Norm Macdonald (PBUH, who I’m sure was part of the branch of the MacWilder side of the family) put it this way, “The job of a comedian is to make comedy.  Comedy is when something unexpected happens.  So, what’s funnier than a comedian that tells a joke and the audience doesn’t laugh?”

Norm’s joke.

I think, for reasons to be explained below, that we are in a time in history where the most amusing thing that could happen, will happen.  And I have evidence.  And not the burn a body at a funeral home it’s a cremation, but burn a body at home all of a sudden it’s “destroying evidence” sort of evidence.  Nope, most every story is one you’ll be familiar with.

The Trump Election in 2016 was my first clue.  I’m fairly sure that Trump thought he was going to lose on election night, but after the polls closed?  Amusing as can be.  Hillary’s mental breakdown and gin-infused refusal to admit that no one would announce her as “Her Cankleness” at the United Nations?

Amusing.

Also amusing was COVID.  Remember the pictures of people collapsing on the street in China?  Yeah.  People fell for that.  In the end, it became a meme.  Again, I’m not saying it was positive, but how amusing would it have been if people had said, “Oh, it’s a really bad flu.”  Heck, there are still people who so mRNA addicted that they get the Pfizer® shot into their eyes every other week.

Why did Hunter sniff artificial sweetener?  He thought it was Diet Coke®.

Amusing.  Even more amusing?  If the mRNA vax didn’t actually help people and was instead an amazingly irresponsible experiment where we tested it on people before we tested it on mice.  Oh, wait . . . .

Not mine.

Although I wanted Trump to be re-elected in 2020, I have to admit that the 2020 election was amusing.  What happens when a bunch of well-funded Leftists and Globalists decide they want to change the rules and control information flow so a barely-living reanimated corpse of a political hack so limited in intellect that he plagiarized law school work and so limited in charisma that houseplants regularly get more attention gets close enough that they can commit (what is likely) the biggest electoral fraud in history?

And Biden is doing such a wonderful job that he’s making Jimmy Carter look like an effective and competent President, while displaying worse morals than Teddy “pants optional” Kennedy.  Sad that Biden doesn’t remember any of that from day to day, and that his son Hunter doesn’t remember the years 2008-2021, and that the New York Times® doesn’t remember anything bad anyone named Biden ever did.

When NASA shows a picture of a hole at work it’s a scientific breakthrough.  When I do the same thing, it’s an HR violation.

It’s certainly amusing, and probably more amusing than if Trump were in his second term.  And what if that child-sniffing dementia patient picks the most vapid and, well, retarded mentally challenged person to ever sit as Vice President?

Amusing as can be.  Mike Pence was boring, mostly.  Kamala Harris regularly shows that her knowledge of foreign policy came through watching game shows and infomercials.  Sham-wow®!

If Kamala was amusing, the withdrawal from Afghanistan was even more so.  To have Joe Biden state, “There’s going to be no circumstance where you see people being lifted off the roof of a . . . .embassy in the—of the United States from Afghanistan. It is not at all comparable,” less than a month before that exact thing actually happened?

Amusing.

Like salmon return to spawn in the rivers, COVID-19 laid its eggs and became the Ukraine.  The Mrs. heard one young high schooler say, “Hey, COVID’s over!  We have World War III!”  The Ukraine became the Next Big Thing.

And then?

Elon Musk.  Pretty much everything he does is amusing.  Twitter® is hilarious.  Beating NASA with 1/1,000th of their budget even more.  And selling electric meme cars to Leftists that now hate him?

I hear that Amber will soon be touring with Korn.

That’s amusing!  He even showed up in commentary at the Johnny Depp/Amber Turd trial.

I think, maybe, that The Market Collapse of 2022 is at least partially from the Left trying to take down Musk and keep Twitter™ as the main source of Leftist indoctrination.  It bothers them so much that they actually panicked enough to appoint a Ministry of Truth.

See?  Amusing.

Now, just this week, I hear that “men” are lactating.  And that “men” can have abortions.  Oh, and did I mention the Supreme Court decision?

Yeah.  Amusing.

The dead writer Robert A. Heinlein wrote about this (when he wasn’t writing about Oedipus) in his Future History.  He called it the Crazy Years.  The Crazy Years were just that – the years after society broke down.  Heinlein didn’t write about that period much at all, mainly because it’s not a great story.

I do hear he was a savvy shopper, so they called him Bilbo Bargains.

J.R.R. Tolkien was going to do a sequel to The Lord of the Rings.  He didn’t.  Why?  After the One Ring was chucked along with Frodo’s finger (note to self, that would be a good band name) and destroyed, things were good.  The world had been saved from Evil, and anything that would be a sequel would have been dark.  It would have involved (from his notes) Aragorn’s kids idolizing Orcs and slowly being seduced by a decadence that prosperity brought, eventually leading to degeneracy and corruption replacing morality and virtue.

Heyyyyyyyyyy . . . .

Most years, most decades, haven’t seen as much amusement as these last six years.  We live in those dark years that neither Heinlein nor Tolkien wanted to write about because it was depressing.

That’s okay.  We’re not in a story.

What we are in, though, is a history moving ever so quickly that the novelty content is ever increasing.

There is one thing that we can do, and one thing only.  In the darkness of years where degeneracy and corruption replace morality and virtue, be moral.  Be virtuous.  Stand for what is right, even when the world flows around you and tells you that good is bad, and men can breastfeed.  Be virtuous, especially when those around you count virtue as the greatest sin.

Why?  It’s right.  And it’s not at all what they’re expecting.

I guess that makes it amusing, right?

Failure: The Source Of Success

“A wizard is never late, Frodo Baggins. Nor is he early. He arrives precisely when he means to.” – The Fellowship of the Ring

Next up, Schrödinger’s Hot Pocket®, which is both ice cold and lava hot at the same time.

In my life, I have been bad at a lot of things.  I’m still bad at most of them, but there are a few things that I’m good at.  The way I got good at them started with being willing to experiment.  By experimenting, I learned a lot of different ways to fail, just like the programmer that got turned down by the waitress – he had an error in connecting to the server.

When I failed, I learned how I failed.  I then stopped doing those things.  But experimenting always has the possibility of failure.

I’ve taken my sons through the same process – I’ve told them many times, “You can figure it out.”  Before he left for college, I taught The Boy how to cook steak.  I thought about teaching him how to make meringue, but I know the Australians hate it – they usually boo meringue.

I hope this joke doesn’t come back at me.

It’s not a lot for a legacy, but he grills steak like a demigod now.  He’s so popular that his college roommates pitched in and bought him a charcoal grill.  The Boy told me he grilled a chicken the other night for two hours, but the chicken still wouldn’t tell The Boy why he crossed the road.

How do you learn to cook well?

The same way that you learn anything – by experimenting, failing, and eventually getting it right.

Once you get it right?  Then you can exploit the knowledge.

A group of researchers looked at just this pattern.  The title of their article says it all:  Understanding the onset of hot streaks across artistic, cultural, and scientific careers.  You can find it here (LINK).

Related:  blind Martians are now known as “brailleins”.

What are hot streaks?  In my experience, it is when a person has exactly the right skills and is in exactly the right place.  The authors of the article indicate that those skills come from prior experimentation.  That is what I’ve observed in my life, too.

One example the authors use is Peter Jackson, who is most known for The Lord of the Rings trilogy and also the billionaire that looks the most like an actual hobbit®.  All of Jackson’s previous work had prepared him for his streak, which in this case was The Lord of the Rings trilogy.  Originally the studio wanted a product tie-in:  Frodo would have connected the keys to JCPenney®, Dillards©, Macy’s™, and all the restaurants in the food court and then tie them to the One Ring.  Then they’d have one ring to rule the mall.

What’s the difference between a Halfling and a Hobbit?  Copyright.

The work that Jackson had done prior to this was important – it taught him all of the things necessary to make a movie, and making The Lord of the Rings was no ordinary movie, since the movies were all filmed at one time.  On top of that, the movie required special effects on a scale that was unprecedented – they had to make Elijah Wood look Frodo-genic.

It was all coupled with Jackson’s fierce devotion to the source material so that the movies would be faithful to Tolkien’s vision.  He even explained why the Eagles couldn’t fly the hobbits into Mordor – it turns out they were on tour.

Making the three movies cost around $300,000,000, so there was quite a bit of trust involved.  Without his prior experience, no one would have given Peter Jackson the job.  Without his prior experiments and his prior failures, he wouldn’t have had the ability to make the film.

But he did have that ability.

Originally Jackson wanted to make a cartoon, but the studio thought that was sketchy.

The movies collectively made nearly $3,000,000,000 (which, for scale, is what we send to the Ukraine every 45 minutes) at the box office, so investing in these films made approximately 10 times the initial investment.  The movies weren’t just popular with people, they were popular at the awards, winning 17 out of 30 Oscars® and getting positive reviews and not getting slapped by Will Smith.

By nearly any measure, these are three of the best films ever made, so I’d call that a pretty good streak.

Peter Jackson must be driven, because he made hundreds of millions of dollars and still goes to work, but I’m thinking he only works on stuff he wants to work on.

That’s the power of being on a streak.  The components are simple:  experimentation, finding a challenge worth taking on that the experiments have prepared you for, and then exploiting those skills to take on the challenge at full speed.  That’s when the streak starts – the right person is at the right place at the right time.

I started teaching my sons karate when they were young.  I don’t know karate – I just enjoy kicking children.

My comment would be to keep experimenting because the experiments will provide skills.  And the combination of those skills will, perhaps, lead to opportunities and places that you’d never expect.

I have learned one secret that I’ll share with you about how to make a steak taste better:  eat it around a bunch of vegans.

Now What?

“Well, that’s the end of the film. Now, here’s the meaning of life.” – Monty Python’s The Meaning of Life

When my boss died, I spent a moment at his coffin.  “Who’s think outside the box now, Terry?”

I have (sometimes) in my life found myself in a weird and uncomfortable place.  No, it’s not the backseat of a VW® Beetle®.  No, it is something that normally people are happy about.  I had accomplished most of what I wanted to do, and then I asked myself, “Now what?”

That is a difficult question.  I have long made it a practice to observe people, or at least I did until the restraining order.  Okay.  Restraining orders.  My observation is that feeling like I felt came normally comes from:

  • a lack of ambition,
  • waking up with amnesia
  • too much success, or
  • having goals set too low.

In my case, it was probably the last one.  I can (happily!) say that I’ve accomplished almost everything that I’ve wanted to do in my career, and I’ve done a lot.  Do you know the team that got Osama Bin Laden?  Not to brag, but I’ll have you know I read a news story about them once.

It must be nice being a Democrat, knowing who voted before the election.

Could I have accomplished more than I have?  Probably.

I suppose that could be viewed as a lack of ambition.  In my defense, I’ve seen a lot of jobs that I don’t want.  And a lot of those jobs come with compromises I simply won’t make anymore.  At one point, when I was much younger, I had a job where I was on the road an average of three days per week.  I can recall one time my boss wanted me to travel to Chicago and I didn’t want to go, so we compromised – I traveled to Chicago.

I’ll admit, travel was fun at first.  One week I started Monday in Portland, Maine and ate lobster, flew to San Antonio and had Tex-Mex, and ended up in Fresno, which is known as the “Akron of the Pacific”.  When I was young, that was a pretty nifty gig, plus the work was fun and varied.

At first.

I ordered a “Chicago style” pizza.  It started shooting right out of the box.

It actually got to the point where I was on the road for eight straight months in the southern part of Chicago.  I did manage to come home alternate weekends – I will say that Midway airport is the only place I’ve ever been that rents cars with a slot for a tail gunner.  The charm of traveling went away.  The fortunate thing is that it cost me a marriage.

But I’m done traveling like that.  There are compromises that I’m not willing to make.  And, as I said, I’ve done most of the things I want to do with my career.

So, it’s not that.

What, then?

If anyone has no family and will be alone this Thanksgiving, let me know.  I need to borrow chairs.

What about family?  Family is always a challenge because being a parent requires almost as much responsibility from me as that one night when they asked me to be a designated driver.  But when kids are grown, it’s up to them to determine what course their lives will take.  Oh, sure, they sometimes want to chat with the old man, but for the most part, they’re independent.  That’s the way I raised them – drop a Bowie knife and some paracord into the crib and if they make it the first month, they’re keepers.  The result of this type of parenting (I think the technical term for it is “neglect”), though, is that the kids are able to make decisions and take action between therapy sessions.  No family is ever perfect, but mine is pretty good.

Okay.  Work was fine.  Family was fine.  What now?

That’s what I was struggling with.  What now?

Then I remembered Joe.

Joe is a friend that I’ve known for years.  Talked to him last week.  I’ve mentioned Joe before.  Pure genius.  Joe, however, wasn’t challenged at his job.  So, he’d let projects go until there were almost due, and then start work on them at the point where he thought that it was just nearly possible that he might not be able to make the deadline and then work at a furious pace.  If Joe had been a chef, the danger would have been that he might have run out of thyme.

Instead, it was a way to keep himself challenged and in the game.

Being a blanket weaver must be the worst.  They always have a looming deadline.

That’s not for me, either.  The challenge was a real challenge, but it was artificial.  It didn’t make Joe better.  It just kept Joe’s job interesting enough so he wasn’t bored enough at work to dial random numbers and say, “I’ve hidden the body.  Now what?”

So, I thought about it.  And thought about it.

What was a challenge big enough?  What could be my vision?

It turned out it was this place.  That’s the reason I keep hitting my deadlines on my posts.  Not every post ends up the way I imagined it would when the idea came into my head – sometimes the posts take on a life of their own in the writing.  And sometimes I have to take two or three runs at an idea until I get exactly the post I was looking for.

I was looking for a challenge, for meaning.

What’s the difference between death and taxes?  Death doesn’t get worse every time Congress meets.

So, I decided to give my life more meaning than that poor man who installs turn signals on BMWs®.  Now, on a given day when I come home from work, I’m a bit tired, but when I reach for the keyboard, it feels good.  I have a goal, a challenge, and meaning.

These things don’t come from without, they come from within.  Even if the circumstances are already there, they have to be recognized and acted upon.

Now what?

If you don’t have a vision of what you want to achieve, make one.

If your life doesn’t have meaning, give it meaning.

These things are in your hands.

That’s what.